Chapter 22 #2
Fox’s arms are crossed, and he looks pissed, but Theodore doesn’t seem to care as he steps closer, smiling brightly.
“Who’s that? I don’t remember anyone delivering pizza like that before,” Strike scoffs from my side.
“I don’t know. He knows Fox, said he was his first love,” I grumble as I watch them. Theodore is talking, and Fox is staring at him. There’s this connection between them that wouldn’t take a genius to figure out.
“I hate him,” I mutter.
“Of course you do.” Dash laughs as he swings his arm around my shoulders. “He’s a rival.”
“No, he isn’t. Fox is mine,” I snap.
“Sure thing.” Strike hugs my other side. “He is hot though. Fox has good taste. I wonder how long ago they dated and why they broke up. Has Fox ever mentioned him?” He looks at me.
“Not once.” That is weird in itself. Fox tells me everything, even before we started dating. I suppose I never asked about his love life, not wanting to know.
We all stand there watching until Fox opens the door, and then we scramble away to look like we weren’t eavesdropping. I grab a mug and pretend to fill it. Strike lies on the table, playing with some fruit, and Dash dives into the fridge.
Fox just blinks at us, looking around. “You guys are so weird,” he mutters as Theodore appears at his side. Fox spares us another glance and begins to head through the kitchen, but Theodore stops.
“So this is your band.” Fox turns back, and it’s clear he isn’t happy, but he remains silent. “I guess you finally got everything you wanted, huh? I’m proud of you. I always knew you would make it.”
“Sure you did,” Fox scoffs.
Theodore’s smile fades for a moment before he looks at me. “You must be Ryker. I’ve seen you on TV with Fox. Thanks for taking care of him for me.”
“It wasn’t for you,” I snap.
“Of course,” he replies slyly. “I’m just glad you aren’t alone in this,” he tells Fox. “I know how hard you worked to become the best you could be. How many hours did we spend at music shops and lessons?”
I freeze, my gaze swinging to Fox. Just how long have they known each other?
“Theo,” Fox warns. “Enough, I don’t want a trip down memory lane. It’s called the past for a reason.”
“Not everything,” Theo retorts, and he looks at me. “I guess some things do change though. He’s not your usual taste. He’s . . . very raw.”
My heart pounds and anger fills me. Dash and Strike step in front of me before I can smash my fist into his perfect face.
“Enough,” Fox barks. “Do not speak to Ryker or any of my family like that. You’ve said what you wanted to, now leave. I’ve made it very clear that I don’t want you in my life. You made your choice, Theo, so live with it.”
“And if I don’t want to?” he counters, stopping before Fox. “What if I want what we had back? What if I made a mistake?”
“Too bad,” Fox replies, his voice cruel. “Now leave.”
“Think about what I said, okay?” He looks at me. “When you get tired of slumming it, come back to me.”
My eyes widen, and then he’s gone, the door shutting softly behind him. Fox scrubs at his face then spares us a look before heading outside, and I shove Dash and Strike out of the way, going out after him.
Irrational jealousy and fear control me.
I yank his arm, turning him around. “Not now, baby, please,” he murmurs.
“Yes, now!” I snap. “Who the fuck was that?”
He looks at me, and I wait, furious. “My ex,” he answers.
“And why was he here? Why did you let him in and talk to him?” I ask. I’m acting crazy, but what did he mean about going back to him?
Is Fox going to leave me?
The idea makes it hard to breathe, and I implore him with my eyes to make this feeling go away.
“He wanted to talk about something, but it wasn’t important. He’s gone, and he won’t be back,” he promises.
I’m angry, really angry and jealous as hell, which is something I hate. “He seems to think he will be, that you’ll be back together.”
“You know that’s not true. I’m dating you,” he soothes, stepping closer, reaching for me, but I shove his hands away.
“How can I say anything?” I hiss. “I’m not even officially your boyfriend, everyone knows that, and I didn’t even know who he was! Evidently, I don’t matter.”
“Ry . . .” Fox sighs.
“How long did you date?” I ask. “When did you break up? Why? What did he tell you?” When he stays silent, I scoff bitterly. “You won’t even tell me? That lets me know exactly where I stand in your life. I’m good enough to fuck, but not good enough to trust, huh?”
“Ryker,” Fox snaps. “That isn’t fair, and you know it isn’t true. I trust you more than I’ve ever trusted anyone.”
I’m quiet then, my heart aching. It hurts as I stare at him. I don’t know why. I guess I always thought I was Fox’s first love, but hearing it from that bastard? It ripped me to pieces and made me unsure in our relationship, and now I’m taking it out on him.
“This is what he wants, for us to fight,” Fox says sadly as he stares at me. “Can you just hold me? Seeing him fucked me up.”
His words make all my anger disappear. Fox never asks me for anything, and seeing how troubled he is makes everything else seem stupid.
Despite my own pain and uncertainty, I wrap my arms around him, and he rests his head against my chest. “I’m sorry,” I murmur.
“I shouldn’t have reacted like that. He just pissed me off. ”
“He has that effect on people,” he grumbles, holding me tighter before he pulls away, cupping my face.
“Next time, don’t let him talk to you like that, okay?
You’re all that matters. I mean it, Ryker.
He’s nothing to me anymore. You’re my everything.
I’m sorry if that hurt you. Ask your questions, and I’ll answer.
I promise.” He takes my hand and leads me over to sit, and I debate if I really want to know.
Is it better to be oblivious? That bastard might use it against me though.
I saw that look in his eyes. He doesn’t plan on going anywhere.
“Tell me everything,” I say.
We sit side by side, and Fox takes a deep breath. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It hurts me more not knowing, like he’s worthy of knowing it and I’m not,” I admit.
“That’s not true. He is my past, Ryker, before I even met you.
I don’t want you to question anything, but I’ll tell you.
We met when we were teenagers, when he moved into my class at school.
His dad owned a music shop, so I spent time there, learning to play.
We grew close, and we started to date. He was my first everything.
” That hurts like hell, but I try to cover it.
It’s my own insecurity. He can’t help who he loved before, but I’ll admit it hurts knowing that Fox is my first love but I’m not his.
“I thought I’d marry him. I thought he was my forever, Ryker. I loved him a lot. I won’t lie about that.” He takes my hand and presses it to his chest. “But this is yours. I vow it. There is nothing left of him in there anymore. He made sure of it.”
“What happened?” I ask.
“He cheated on me. When I found out, I even forgave him. I was so young and desperate for him to love me. We graduated and were living in his shitty, one-bedroom apartment as I tried to support us, and I couldn’t bear the idea of losing him.
He was all I had, Ryker—no family or friends, just him—but he did it again and again, and when I confronted him, he admitted he didn’t love me anymore and that he couldn’t stay with a ‘futureless loser fighting every day for his meals.’ He moved in with the guy he cheated on me with that very same day—some older, Wall Street motherfucker.
It hurt a lot. He fucked me up with mind games and cheating, and then I turned back to music, more determined than ever to make it. I met you two years later.”
“Oh.” It’s all I can say as I process his words. His ex sounds like an asshole. How could he do that to Fox? If you don’t love someone, just leave. Why the hell did he need to cheat and break his heart and trust?
Gripping my face, he stares into my wide eyes.
“But I never loved him the way I love you. I needed to lose him to find you, and I’m so fucking glad I did.
This thing between us is forever. This is what I was missing.
This is real love. Don’t ever doubt that.
I loved him as a kid, but I love you as a man.
I’m sorry you aren’t my first love, but I swear, Ry, you will be my last.”
“I better be,” I grumble as I lean into his side, holding his hand. “I hate him,” I admit childishly.
“Good. Don’t ever let me see you insecure and cowed like that again.
The Ryker I love is crazy and bold and not afraid to say anything.
” He kisses my head. “Don’t change because of him.
I don’t plan to. He doesn’t matter, and our past doesn’t matter.
Only this does.” He lifts my chin. “I love you, baby, so much.”
“I love you too.” I sigh as he kisses me softly until there’s a crash.
We both turn to see a smashed plant pot, Dash holding the tree that was in it, his wide eyes visible through the foliage. Strike is at his side, and it’s very clear they were eavesdropping.
“I guess you have a family now. We are just a bit insane,” I comment, a smile tilting my lips.
I still hate that I met his ex, but it isn’t his fault. It’s my own issue, not his.
“I do, and I’ve never been happier. I wish I had all of you back then, but now will do.” He kisses my head again. “Don’t let him ruin our night. Let’s go watch movies with those two dumbasses, and then I’ll make it up to you all night.”
Desire floods me, and I crane my head back, a flirty smile curving my lips. “You better.”
“It’s a deal,” he says as he kisses me, chasing away all those petty, insecure feelings.
Nothing has changed between us, and that makes me feel safe.