Chapter 47
LUNA
The first time I wake up is when Charlie climbs out of bed. In a whisper, he tells me he’s going to let Pig back inside, then come back to bed. I’m asleep before I can discover if he’s fulfilled his promise.
The next time I wake up, there’s a dog leg digging into my back and a warm man at my side.
Despite my being fully awake, there’s nothing strong enough to pull me out from under these covers.
Charlie still sleeps beside me, his long, lean body sprawled out over his portion of the bed.
He’s belly down, arms gripping a pillow, his face turned toward me, jaw slack, and emitting faint snores in his sleep.
I can’t pinpoint exactly what about last night forced me out of my comfort zone and demanded I do something about my attraction to Charlie.
But when we got home and I felt his eyes on me, I couldn’t imagine going to separate bedrooms or sleeping in the same room but with our normal dog buffer.
I couldn’t imagine being married to Charlie for one more day without treating him like my true husband.
I just wanted him. Wanted to pretend this could all be real.
That we could be happy together. That I could fall in love with him.
When I had been a kid, I wasn’t really a kid.
My mother’s disinterest in parenting meant the responsibility of caring for myself and Dash—and, at times, Leo too—fell on my shoulders.
I had grown up fast, missing out on all the freedom children get to enjoy when they don’t have to worry about grown-up things.
Where the closest they get is playing house.
I want to play house now. I want to pretend with this man. Believe we’re a happy little family with no problems on the horizon.
Can’t I have that? Can it be my birthday present to myself? Pretend for this year, we’re not in a fake marriage, but a real one. Indulge in the fantasy.
And then, at the end of the year, the game will end.
I’ll have had my taste of joy and partnership, and I’ll use those memories as comforting blankets when he’s gone.
And he will leave.
They always do.
“Good morning.” Charlie’s voice rumbles deep with sleep, pulling my focus back to the bed and his warm eyes.
“Morning.” I shift on my pillow, facing him. “I want to amend some of the marriage rules.”
A slow smile pulls his mouth wide. “You do?”
“We’d both have to agree.”
“Of course.”
“The keep it platonic rule.”
“You added that in the first place. You want it gone? It’s gone.”
We both know it was truly gone when he sat me on the kitchen counter and licked me until I was gasping his name.
“Okay. It’s gone.”
“Good. And what else?”
The one saying this ends after a year, my mind begs. But I don’t let the urge take control of my mouth.
“That’s it.”
He frowns. “You said rules. Plural.”
Shit. I did. I scrape my brain for the other items on the list.
But that’s the thing. I have trouble remembering what they are.
Because when I’m with Charlie, I don’t care about the rules. All I think about is him, how he makes me feel. How I want him to make me feel.
With his hands. And his mouth. And his tongue.
And that perfect dick of his.
The thoughts are too much. I lunge across the mattress, pinning him back against the sheets, bracketing him with my thighs, and stealing possession of his lush lips. Charlie kisses me back just as hard, melding our mouths together.
Pig lets out an unhappy huff at all the jostling and climbs off the bed, throwing us major side-eye as she waddles from the room.
We share a laugh before I recapture his lips. My body aches for him, and I rub myself against his form, searching for every way we can touch. Be together for this short time we have.
Charlie’s groan spills out, vibrating through me.
I trace his strong jawline with harsh, hurried kisses. “I’m on birth control, and I want you. Now,” I growl into his ear before biting the lobe.
He jerks, and in a surprising move, he turns us until I’m under him. Not a position I normally let partners claim, but his weight on me sets off delicious twisting in my lower belly. His chest against mine has me sinking into the mattress.
“I need you.” Charlie hisses the words against my neck as he slides inside me.
I let the pleasure of being with him rise, ignoring his words. I know what it’s like to be needed.
But that doesn’t mean I’ll ever let myself need somebody else.