Chapter 19
TOMáS
I’m on my second drink by the time everyone arrives at Hummingbirds. Everyone except for the one person I’ve been nervously waiting on to arrive. The disappointment I feel inside must have transferred to my face, since it’s the first thing Lorena comments on as she gives me a hug hello.
“Nice to see you to.” Her sarcastic jab goes in one ear and out the next. I’m too busy looking past her, scanning the room.
Where is she?
Tino taps my shoulder. “She’s outside,” he says, as if he can read my mind.
“Who?” My attempt at playing it off or being casual doesn’t land with him.
“Who do you think?” He offers me a sly grin, keeping his voice low so my sister doesn’t catch on. “Sarina.”
My throat tightens, nerves working their way up my airway.
“She said she’ll be right in. Don’t worry.”
“Why would I be worried?”
The question is rhetorical, but it’s answered for me when I feel my pulse quicken watching Sarina make her way through the crowd.
There’s a lot I should be worried about.
Mainly how I’m going to pretend that my connection with her is purely professional.
My heart skips a beat when Sarina stops in front of me.
The off the shoulder dress she chose to wear has her skin glowing more than it already does.
But it’s the confidence she exudes that has me in a chokehold, commanding every ounce of my attention.
The way she stands with her shoulders upright, like she owns the room, not in an arrogant way, but in a way that makes you want to be a part of whatever she’s about to do next, has me entranced.
It’s an electric feeling, and something that I so desperately need more of.
Lorena sandwiches herself in the middle of where Sarina and I are standing, face to face, but a good foot apart.
She wraps one arm around Sarina’s shoulder and then attempts to get on her tip toes to do the same to mine, so I help her out by bending slightly.
Bad idea. My attempt at being helpful has resulted in the three of us clumsily rocking back and forth, until Lorena gives up and steps back and then, as luck would have it, it’s me and Sarina, mere inches apart, arms grazing one another’s.
“My god Tomás, you almost knocked us all over,” Lorena scoffs.
I try to play off the nerves that are working overtime, making my pulse present in my ears. “Yeah,” is all I can say.
Relief should be what I feel as Sarina swoops in to speak, sounding calm and collected, but I’m feeling anything but.
Maybe everyone was right, maybe I don’t have game. Since the first hookup I’ve had in who knows how long, has made me feel so out of sorts.
It was just a hook up.
It was just me and her in a room full of mirrors, with a front seat to how at peace she looked when she rode my face.
It was just a moment. That’s all.
Lorena’s fingers snap, breaking me from the trance I embarrassingly got lost in. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I murmur.
“Good.” My sister takes the half empty glass I’ve been nursing and hands it to Tino, whose facial expression towards me is screaming, ‘Get it together’.
Trust me, I’m fucking trying.
Lorena continues. “Now I believe you owe my friend a dance like you promised.”
No one knows better than I do the domino effect that happens when I truly let loose.
But the freedom it gives me, not to mention the confidence that I need to be around Sarina, is worth the risk.
Before I can put up any more of an internal fight, her hand is in mine and I’m leading her out onto the dance floor.
And just like that, even in a crowded room, it feels like we’re alone.
“I love this song,” Sarina breathes. The opening instruments of Marc Anthony’s cover of Preciosa, spilling through the speakers, filling the room.
“Me too.” Nostalgia tugs at my heart.
This was one of my father’s favorite songs, and in turn, it has become one of mine.
It’s a song about pride for our Puerto Rican heritage.
A song celebrating the love and resilience of our island and people.
Some of my fondest memories throughout have been accompanied by this song playing in the background and now, I get to add another one to the list.
Dancing to it with her.
I’ve lost all track of time. We both have.
It’s not until the previously dim lights burn bright, and the DJ thanks everyone for coming out, that we both register Salsa night is over.
I couldn’t tell you how many songs we danced to.
Time didn’t cross my mind. If anything, it froze.
Not a word was spoken between us. At least not with our mouths.
Whatever we needed the other one to hear, and whatever we wanted to get off our chests, our bodies spoke for us.
Moving in sync with the other, trusting that with each dip, twist and turn, we’d be there to continue what we’ve started.
Just as I’m about to thank her for dancing with me, Lorena and Tino walk over to us.
A slow clap dramatically sounds from Lo. “You two got your steps in today.” She nudges my arm. “You promised her a dance, not the whole night.”
“What can I say? Sarina’s an excellent partner.”
Tino’s eyes scrutinize me, likely waiting for me to either correct what I just said or put my foot in my mouth further.
“Dance partner,” I correct. “It’s been a while since I’ve actually danced at Salsa night, so it was good to get it out of my system.” My attempt at downplaying has my heart racing with guilt.
“Whatever you say, man. It was good to see you let loose,” Tino cuts in.
“Yes, very,” Lorena adds. “Gabriella will be pleasantly surprised.”
“Why’s that?”
Lorena and Tino exchange a loaded look between them.
“Hello?” I press.
Lorena walks to Sarina, interlacing arms. “After I showed Gabriella Sarina’s picture, she said that she’s too beautiful for you, and that you’d chicken out of dancing with her. So,” the inflection in her voice increases. “She will be very surprised that wasn’t the case.”
For a moment I can’t tell if Lorena is really being naive or she’s waiting for me to say something incriminating.
Either way, I’m not engaging with it. All I care about is timing my exit perfectly, so that when I see Tino and her leave, I can try to convince Sarina to not let our time together end just yet.
After all, we technically have a lot to go over.
Last I saw her —earlier today in the office— we left on the cliffhanger of me attending her sister’s wedding.
We were supposed to go over the details.
Sure, that could wait until tomorrow or another day, but after we quite literally danced the night away, I’m not ready to call it quits, just yet.
I let out a yawn, and Tino must be reading my mind, because he mimics one himself, suggesting him and Lo call an Uber.
Thankfully she agrees and they say goodbye to us.
The sigh Sarina lets out matches how I feel. Both of us relieved that we’re alone once more.
Sarina looks over my shoulder. I turn around to see what she’s looking at and see Dante by the bar, glaring at us in between talking to some of his staff.
“Tino’s brother?” Sarina asks.
I can’t help but chuckle as I wave to him, and the grump that he is, barely cracks a smile while returning the gesture. “Correct.”
“He looks…protective,” she observes.
“I think suspicious is more like it.”
“Does he have reason to be?”
I can’t tell if she’s being playful or if she’s trying to find out if I told him about us. Either way, I go over it.
“What do you say we get out of here?”
She looks around, pointing to the almost cleared crowd. “Given that this place is closing, I think that’s a good idea.”
Not sure what overcomes me, I reach for her hand. “Then lets go.”
Her eyes light up, and without a word she follows my lead.
It’s been a while since I’ve stayed out this late, but luckily for us, we are in the city that never sleeps and I know a place we can go that will give us some more time together.
When I try to order us a ride and see how long the wait times are, I figure our best bet is walking. That is, until I see how visibly uncomfortable, she looks in her heels as she leans from side to side wincing. Not surprising, given how long we were dancing for.
“Feet hurt?”
“What gave it away?”
Her sarcasm brings a smile to my lips.
“Hop on,” I say, patting my back.
“To your back?”
“Sí, unless you can think of another way we can get there.”
“Fine,” she huffs out, snapping her fingers. “Well, you need to kneel so I can get on.”
“Of course.” I lower myself to my knees, but instead of facing away from her, I’m on both of them looking directly at her as I take off my suit jacket. “Here. Wrap this around your waist.”
She takes it, twisting the sleeves into a double knot.
“There we go.” I maneuver myself on the uncomfortable sidewalk, lifting myself slightly, still low enough that she can get on my back while making it easy for me to stand straight and walk us to our destination.
Her arms wrap around my neck, sending a shiver down my spine from the contact especially as her mouth lowers to my cheek. Pressing a soft, barely there kiss to my skin, she murmurs, “You’re always looking out for me, aren’t you?”
“Maybe.”
“Well, whatever it is, I like it. It’s nice to be treated like a queen for a change.”
“I don’t know who you’ve dealt with in the past, but that’s changing now.”
I can’t see her fully through my periphery, but I can feel the shift in her demeanor. Her voice becomes timid, subtle. “With our fake dating arrangement?”
Fake as it may be, I mean it. “Yes.”
“Right. Speaking of my chariot, wherever you’re taking me to, we are going to need to discuss the rules and expectations, since we don’t have much time until the wedding and we didn’t do much talking back at Hummingbirds.”
“How much time do we have?” I ask, stopping in front of the entrance, letting her off my back.
“The wedding is in one week. You seriously have no idea how much you’re saving me. My dad has been on me about settling down forever. At least this will get him off my case for the time being,” she says, taking in our surroundings. “A club? You didn’t get enough dancing in before?”
“Yes, but they have some of the best food carts inside. I figured we both could use something to eat. And if we so happen to dance some more, I could think of worse ways to spend my night.” I open the door for us. “After you.”
Upon entering she sees the pastelillo cart, which is why I chose this place. Squealing, she taps at my arm. “I can’t believe you remembered.”
It’s not lost on me how cruel this feels. This is the first connection I’ve had with someone in a long time, and it’s not real.
Right?