Chapter 4
Paisley
O ur group are all over helping Noah settle into his new place. Every time they burst into laughter, I glare ice-cold daggers at the closed blinds of my living room. Noah shouldn’t be allowed to have fun with my friends while I sit here alone feeling sorry for myself. Mae, the sweetheart, offered to stay with me, but I knew she really wanted to join them, so I told her to go. Truth is, I’m not great company tonight anyway. I’m so miserable after last night. Part of me wants to call Jake up and demand he take back his hurtful words. But it’s too late. They have crept under my skin, their truth too much to stand.
Dragging my sorry body through my living room, I bump straight into the sharp corner of the coffee table in the dark. “Motherfuck…” I cry, grabbing my knee, trying to rub out the now thumping pain. Screw this shit. I need more wine. After my mammoth hangover this morning, I was going to be a good girl and enjoy just a couple of glasses tonight. But what’s the point? Right now, I need something to block it all out. I find the second bottle of wine in the top shelf over the fridge and grab it greedily.
Opening the back door onto the patio, I take a seat on the sun lounger, cracking open the bottle, and drinking straight from it. Jake’s words from this morning come back to haunt me. You’re a train wreck . Me. The girl voted most likely by my classmates to make it big. Once upon a time, I had dreams of getting out of this town and making something of myself. I wanted to work in fashion and travel the world. I could have done it too. In my senior year of high school, I was offered a position at a prestigious fashion house in Paris. The designer had been a friend of my mother’s, someone she once worked with, and it was the kind of opportunity that only comes once in a lifetime. Thrilled, I accepted it in a heartbeat and was making plans to travel abroad. I just needed to finish up the school year to keep my father happy. Staying that last month is the biggest regret of my life.
Laughter erupts from next door again, and I cringe, bringing the bottle back up to my mouth and chugging as much as I can before needing to take a breath. It slides down easily, warming my insides. I can’t do this. Live next door to him. It was impossible knowing he was hours away, even worse when he was at the hotel. But this close, I won’t survive.
“You could just come and join us.” Noah’s voice startles me with its cool charm. I thought I was alone out here. But right there peeping over my fence is his cheeky face. “My bedroom still needs to be set up; I could use your… creativity up there.” He grins slyly, and I know what he’s implying. We used to have a hell of a lot of fun in the bedroom.
Irritation snakes up my spine slowly. Of course, he thinks this is all some fucking joke. I place my wine bottle down on the concrete patio and slowly rise, strolling over toward the fence where he’s peering over. Smug-as shit grin on his pretty boy face. “Go back to your party, Noah.”
“What, and leave you alone to get blackout drunk again? I’m worried about you, Paisley. This isn’t you, guzzling wine from the bottle, alone.” His face turns more serious, and I hate him even more for caring. And for the pity in his voice. I don’t need any of it.
Even still, a flutter of familiarity at his protectiveness comes over me. It takes me back to our summer together, and for a second, I’m right back there, stuck in the past where he’s my savior. The man who brought me out of the darkness and taught me to live again after the hell I had been through. But then I remember what he did to me, and it’s like a cup of ice water to the face. My dagger-filled eyes meet his. How long has he been standing there watching me, and how the hell does he know about last night? “What do you mean blackout drunk again?” I snap back.
He raises an apathetic brow. “You know this town. Nothing stays quite for long.”
Spinning on my heel, I feel my hair fan out as I stalk back toward my bottle, picking it up and draining the remainder, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand for emphasis. “I’m not your concern, Noah.” I try to roll my eyes, but the action makes my head spin. I overcorrect my balance, and I trip over the deck chair, falling onto the solid concrete floor below. Pain throbs through my elbow, and I stay down in a crumpled heap on the cold floor, trying to rub the ache away, just waiting for the smug asshole to laugh his head off at me.
But when I glance up, he’s right there in front of me, his hand held out. “Come on, Paisley, let me help you.”
I shove his hand out of the way and pull myself up to standing. “Go back to your party,” I grumble under my breath. I can’t even look at him right now. I know he’s right, I know they all are. But he’s the last person I want helping me. He’s the reason I’m in this mess in the first place.
He takes my arm, gently pulling me back into his solid body. And for a second, I find myself momentarily lost in his charming eyes. The way he looks at me with so much longing. It’s a look I’ve dreamed about for way too long.
Tension crackles through the crisp night air around us.
Anger.
Frustration.
And something else so much more frightening. The deepest desire you could ever imagine. Even after everything he did to me, I still want him like crazy.
Delicately he skates a hand down my bare arm, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. I feel giddy, desperate. I want his hands everywhere, bringing me back to life like only he can. His cock buried so damn deep inside of me I can’t feel this fucking pain anymore.
“You’re freezing, you need a coat,” he says softly, looking me over like he actually cares about my welfare.
“I’m fine, I have wine to warm me.” I smile smugly, not wanting him to be kind to me. It’s too late for that. No matter how much I want him.
His face hardens in irritation. Then he removes the coat he has on and places it around my shoulders, forcing me to shrug into it. His calloused hands linger on my body longer than they should when he’s done.
I suck in a shaky breath, feeling even more light-headed than I did when I fell. I can’t be this close to him. His scent is damn intoxicating, and it’s bringing back way too many memories I buried long ago.
His hand sweeps into my hair, so naturally like it’s supposed to be there, tugging my head back swiftly and forcing me to gaze up at him dreamily. All the air is sucked from my lungs in an instant. My entire body is alight and tingling for his touch. “Paisley, I…”
The back door suddenly swings open, and he pulls back from me immediately, my skin instantly feeling the bite of the cold night air in his absence. Emerson and Mae fill the space, a hand wrapped around each other’s shoulders, their faces glowing with happiness. Their eyes are sleepy. They look a little tipsy. “Em’s staying here tonight,” Mae announces, looking between us in question.
“How did you get over here?” Emerson asks Noah, a look of bemusement on her face. “Did you fly?” She giggles at her own joke.
“Jumped the fence. This one’s drunk off her nut again and tripped over the deck chair,” he tells her, disappointment in his tone that I don’t appreciate. He sounds like my father.
My face wrinkles in disgust at the thought of placing the two of them in the same category. “I’m not drunk. I’ve only had one bottle,” I throw back at him. How dare he accuse me of being drunk. It takes a lot more than one bottle of wine to get me intoxicated. I’m a seasoned drinking professional, after all. Just ask our busybody neighbor.
His eyes rake over me slowly, and I think he’s supposed to be accusing me of something, but that look of desire’s still there. What was he about to say before the girls walked in? “I think your bleeding elbow speaks for itself.” He scoffs, even though I know he can’t see my elbow through his jacket.
I feel my sore elbow and realize he’s right, there is a trickle of blood from the cut sticking to the inside of his jacket. “I fell because of you,” I throw back at him, exasperated. Why is he trying to make me look bad in front of my friends? If he had any intention of coming over here tonight to make amends, he has a shitty way of doing it.
Emerson wraps her arm around my shoulder, patting me. “Come on, let’s get you all fixed up,” she says kindly as Mae opens the door for us. “See you tomorrow, Noah,” she calls over her shoulder.
I don’t bother looking back. What the hell was that look he gave me, the hold he had on me? And him throwing me under the bus like a tattling five-year-old. Paisley’s drunk. I shake my head at the thought. He has some nerve coming anywhere near me. But even so, I cozy into his warm jacket. It smells of him, and something about that is so comforting.
Emerson sits me at the kitchen counter while Mae finds a band-aid. I shrug the jacket off on the sore side, and Emerson places the band-aid on my cut. She pulls back to look at me, a motherly concern in her pretty features. “We’re worried about you, honey.”
I roll my eyes and sigh heavily. Toughing the jacket back on, I hug it around myself tighter. “Why does everyone keep saying that? You two have had more than me tonight.”
Mae’s gotten to work in the kitchen, taking out three mugs and placing them on the countertop in front of her as she heats the kettle. She holds up the empty bottle of wine I left on the bench earlier like it’s evidence. “Paisley, this isn’t you.”
I stand in a rush, snatching the bottle from her hands. “Maybe it is, Mae.” Maybe this is what my life is going to be reduced to, drinking alone on a Sunday night. And you know what? I’m okay with that. So, you lot better get over this whole we’re worried about you thing. Because I don’t need you worrying. I’m just fine.”
They both look at me like I’ve lost my mind, so I turn and stalk from the room, stomping my feet on every step as I make my way up to my bedroom.
“I’ll bring your tea up for you then,” Mae calls after me, unaffected by my meltdown.
I slam my door for emphasis. Not because I’m really annoyed at the girls. I love the girls. I’m just pissed at the world tonight, and it feels a hell of a lot like they have sided with Noah.
Dumping the empty bottle down on my dressing table, I find my PJs to throw on. Jerk Noah’s jacket off and place it on my bed. Shimmy out of the wide-leg pants and blouse I had on, followed by my underwear and bra. I pull on my shorts then turn as I’m slinking into my silk camisole, turning around just in time to find I have an audience again. Noah’s bedroom window is wide open. The smirk on his face tells me he just got a show. Probably full view of my tits and ass. For fuck’s sake. The previous residents kept their blinds closed all the time. Probably because they were always at each other’s throats, and they didn’t want us witnessing the crazy. I march over to the window and pull the drapes closed aggressively so I can’t see him anymore. The jerk is really pissing me off tonight. This town isn’t big enough for the two of us. And I’m not sure how I’m going to do it yet, but I need to get rid of him.
When I spin back toward my bed, I see his jacket. I should burn it. But instead, I pull it back on over my PJs and climb into bed. I’ll work out how to eradicate him from this town in the morning. Right now, I need to hang on to a little piece of him.