Chapter 10
Chapter ten
Raegan
Do dresses carry bad luck?
I pick at the black fabric of the skater dress I’d worn to the Guild party that feels like forever ago. The one that was interrupted by Thorne’s untimely fake death and Gordon’s real death, which led to Harvey’s betrayal and Charles’s attack.
The only other black dress I have is the one Kellan got me for dancing at a nightclub, and it doesn’t seem appropriate.
Like Vera gives a shit what you wear to see her.
Three sharp knocks at the bathroom door precede Aiden’s voice. “Are you ready?”
I check myself in the mirror one last time.
The dress covers my arms and hugs the curve of my shoulders before cutting to a V-shape in the front, and an even deeper one in the back.
The skirt flows and moves with me, and between its shorter length and my heels, showcases my legs.
My hair is pulled to one side over my shoulder, and I stuck with simple eyeliner and mascara.
Trying to look nice does nothing to ease the knots in my stomach.
I’ve hardly seen Dane since we left him at Reid’s apartment. He’d stayed there all night working with them to get the enhanced security features in place. The last thing we’d need is GE catching us off guard during Harvey’s service.
They were able to make some sort of quantum field that blocks dimensional travel on each floor of the Tower. There are gaps, but Dane says they’re tiny and tucked into places that don’t matter. As soon as they’d finished, he crashed into his bed. Aiden was going to wake him up while I got ready.
The bathroom door opens. “Oh! Yeah. I’m read—” The words die on my lips when I see him.
I’m expecting a suit as he usually wears, but instead, he’s dressed down from his standard.
Black slacks and a black cashmere sweater with a loose V-neck, teasing his smooth chest and lining the swell of his biceps.
His hair is still styled back with a single strand falling to his forehead.
His dark gaze drags up my legs, heating me where it lands as it continues upward.
“You’re underdressed,” I scold him, but it’s diminished by the breathiness of my voice when he swiftly closes the distance between us.
His fingers graze down my back, his touch gentle over my exposed scars.
“You’re perfect,” he purrs, and a shiver curls at the base of my spine.
Aiden kisses the side of my neck, sending a parade of goosebumps across my skin.
I close my eyes, my mouth popping open as I inhale sharply, and my body comes alive at his touch.
Suddenly, I’m pressed against the vanity, his mouth devouring mine, his hand sliding up my thigh beneath my skirt to grab my ass. He kicks my feet apart,guiding my thigh to his hip, while his hard length rubs against my core.
I moan, wrapping my leg around him to pull him closer and grinding my hips to increase the friction between us.
“What’s taking so long?” Kellan shouts from the living room, and I nearly jump out of my skin and shove Aiden back.
He releases me but doesn’t move away. He grips the counter on either side of me and pants, his intense stare drilling into me as if I’m his greatest vice and he’s given up fighting it.
“I almost dragged you out of the crowd that night,” he eventually says.
“You thought you were safe being a brat with the Guild around, but you should know that I don’t care about that.
” His hand curls over my throat. He squeezes lightly. A soft but no less real threat.
“Everything goes out the window when it comes to you. I’d have no problem throwing you over my lap and spanking your ass in front of the others if it teaches you a lesson. Remember that.” He gives me a peck on the lips and leaves.
My heart races from what just happened, flooding my veins with heat as his words replay in my mind.
As they finally sink in past the lust.
He wouldn’t dare.
I rush to the living room, ready to throw him a retort, until I see the somber expression on Dane’s face. The rush of anger instantly fizzles out.
Fuck.
Dane smiles when he sees me, then stands. “I like that dress.”
“Thanks.”
He nods and turns to the door that Aiden’s holding open.
Right.
Time to see Vera.
The office is overflowing with flowers of all colors, shapes, and sizes.
There are stands with flower wreaths, massive vases of bouquets, and even hanging garlands with flowers interwoven in them.
The single desk is pushed against the back wall, and an ornately carved box sits at its center.
A champagne bucket and stand of white roses are off to the side of it.
I’ve never been to a funeral or wake before, but I’ve seen enough movies and shows with them. No loved ones or friends of Vera sent these flowers. There are no pictures, no memories of her displayed anywhere in the room, because we have none.
For all the beauty in this small space, it’s also a harsh reminder of Vera’s life.
And I wonder how lonely she’s been all these years, hiding behind anger and her wish to be a part of something. Only for that wish to be twisted and abused.
Aiden goes first, picking a white rose from the bucket and speaking softly to Vera. The rest of us are on the opposite side of the room to give him privacy. I keep sneaking glances at Dane to check on him, but his face is carefully calm.
Too calm.
Kellan is next. His time up there is shorter than Aiden’s before he lays the rose over the box. Jackson takes a rose and then sets it beside the others before walking back.
Kell nudges me forward.
I use that push to propel my feet across the room as much as I’m dreading it. I move on autopilot, letting my body mimic the moves I’d watched the others take. Stop in front of the desk. Take a rose.
Breathe.
The box is simple on the front and sides, but the lid has carved flowers, vines, and branches surrounding a heart in the center. It’s beautiful.
But one of the vines, snaking down and then splitting into two... it reminds me of the scar I’d given her when she’d died the first time. The one that ran into her eyebrow and continued to her cheekbone.
“I’m sorry. I don’t think I have anything nice to say.
I already grieved for the girl who’d been like a sister to me a long time ago.
I can’t mourn your death this time like before.
” I tighten my grip on the rose stem. “I guess... I’m sorry for everything that happened after.
You didn’t deserve to be used and controlled like that.
And I’m sorry that I was the one to kill you again, but I understand why you wanted it to be me.
” I think of Harvey’s sister and what she’s going through, what she’ll have to live with.
“You didn’t want Dane forced to kill his sister. At least you gave him that.
“But,” I continue, my throat thickening, “more than anything, I’m relieved that you’re gone.
That you won’t put Dane in any more danger.
I’m happy, but I’m also terrified of what this is going to do to him.
To us. I killed you again, and I know he swore what happened to you wouldn’t change anything between us, but—”
My breath catches when Dane steps up next to me. I place my flower on her urn and start to leave to give him privacy, but he takes my hand and holds me there.
“Hey, Ver,” he greets, his voice soft. “I didn’t mean to interrupt you two, but I felt like it couldn’t wait.” He squeezes my hand like a silent plea to stay.
So, I do.
“Thank you for giving me whatever kept Royce’s gift from controlling me.
For thinking of me at all when you were with them.
I know we stopped seeing eye to eye a long time ago, but seeing that you still cared about me.
.. it meant a lot.” He swallows hard. “I never stopped caring about you. Even when you did and said shitty things. Even when you refused to read my letters. There were times I think I hated you, too. But because I cared so much and you seemed not to care at all.”
A tear slips past my defenses. I don’t look at him. I can’t. I know I’ll lose it if I do. I stare at Vera and listen to his voice. I hold on to his hand as much as he’s holding on to mine, grounding ourselves in each other as his words rip me apart piece by piece.
“I wish I could have saved you. I wish this had been a second chance for us to start over. I wish I had seen what you were going through on the island before they got to you. Sometimes, I wish so hard that I think my chest is going to cave in, Ver. And there’s a hole at the bottom, waiting for me if I let it, just like I had last time, when I couldn’t let you go or let go of my wishes.
Where I could stay with the good memories of you.
But... I can’t this time. I hate who I was then.
I never want to be him again. Don’t be mad, okay? ”
He draws a shuddering breath. “When all this is over, I’ll bring our parents to see you so you won’t be lonely.” He lifts the lid of the urn with his notebook, sliding it into a slot at the back, as if it’d been made for it. “Here. I wrote you one last letter. Read it for me?”
I break, a sob slipping free. Dane presses a tender kiss to my cheek, then releases my hand and leaves the room.
I drop to my knees as the emotion crashes through me like a storm at sea, raging in my chest and spilling over.
Anger and sadness thrash and collide within me, and I feel my gift churning in my gut.
GE did this. They made Dane go through her death all over again. They use us like tools. Like test rats to get what they want, then toss us aside when they’re done. Like Vera. Like Harvey.
Heat flashes through me, searing my veins and glowing red.
I’m pulled into a broad chest and thick arms. “I’ve got you, beautiful.”
I’m too emotional, my thoughts so rampant that some of my gift cracks his skin. I try to push away when I see it, but he embraces me tighter. “It’s okay. Let it all out. I won’t let go.”
“Kell, I’m hurting you,” I choke, still struggling.