Chapter Thirty #2
“You heard from him? You know how it went?” Max asked, wiping down the bar top.
“No, he’s been strangely quiet. I’m hoping that means he’s been taken out by the guys to celebrate.”
Tilly came back and it was finally time for the bull riding. Since it was only a highlights program, the clips on each rider were very brief. A few hit the mid to late eighties in score. Tilly kept spouting off stats and I let her, I was too nervous to watch Leo and needed the distraction.
“There he is!” Tilly cried and my head snapped up to the screen.
There was my blond-haired, fearless daredevil, sitting astride the bull. His powerful thighs clenched tight, his expression studious as Frank shouted words of encouragement at him.
“Based on the other scores, he’s got a real good shot at getting to the final,” Tilly said.
“Just needs to hold on tight and put a bit of flair into the ride,” Max added.
“He’s got a good bull too which should help,” Tilly whispered.
All of us were tense. The volume in the entire bar had dropped, like all the patrons knew how important this was and had shut their yapping.
Then the gate crew were tugging the chute open and the bull leapt out. I ignored the commentators talking about how aggressive this bull was. My heart was racing fast enough without having to know he was the most aggressive bull that could have been drawn.
But that was my man. He took on the toughest with a smile on that gorgeous face of his.
My heart was in my throat as the bull kicked and twisted in the air, throwing Leo forward. I gasped softly when it looked like he was going to be flung but then he righted himself and relief flooded me.
“Only another second!” Tilly cried.
“Come on, Leo!” Max cheered. “Did you see that spurring?” Max tossed the question to Tilly, excitement driving their words louder.
“Incredible! He’s got to be a top scorer!” Tilly replied.
The buzzer signaled Leo’s eight seconds were up and I pushed out the breath I’d been holding, dropping my head. He’d done it.
“Oh no!” Tilly cried and my stare snapped back up to the screen.
After the buzzer sounded, the bull had bucked Leo and dislodged him, but he was still attached by his hand. Leo landed hard and then immediately disappeared under the bull. The bull fighters surrounded them, trying to distract the animal but I ignored them, I just wanted to see Leo again.
“Is he okay?” I demanded, trying to strain my ears to hear the commentators.
“I don’t know,” Max replied softly.
One of the commentator’s voices rose out above the crowd in the bar. “Oh and that was a hard blow to the chest! Big Bucker really making a name for himself!”
“They need to change his name to Big Stomper after that, hot damn!” another one added.
I clapped my hand over my mouth as they replayed the wreck in slow motion. The bull had stomped on Leo’s chest.
“Hang on a minute there, Chuck. I don’t think he’s looking too good,” the first commentator said.
Nausea churned my stomach as Leo appeared, but he wasn’t standing strong, he was swaying. His legs buckled and he collapsed into the dirt, clutching his chest. His mouth opened but he didn’t say anything and then he was being helped to his feet by the bull fighters.
“What’s happening?!” I gasped, panicked.
I watched as Tori rushed into the arena and hurried to Leo’s side. Then she was gesturing and shouting, her expression anything but calm. When the camera showed Leo again, he was unconscious.
“Oh God!” I cried, hands covering my mouth. The camera cut back to Tori as she signaled for help. My heart was racing, and I was sweating despite goosebumps raising on my skin. I grabbed for my phone and pulled up his contact and rang him.
There was no answer.
“Come on!” I shouted as I rang him again and again, and each time it just rang out.
“Tori,” Max shouted. “Try Tori!”
I pulled up her number, my fingers fumbling. Tori answered immediately.
“I was just going to call you,” she said.
“Tori?” I choked out. “Is he okay?”
Max tugged my arm and dragged me and Tilly to his office located in the back of the bar. He shut us in the room. Tilly nervously chewed on her thumbnail and Max stood with his arm around her, trying to calm her down.
“He’s stable, for now,” Tori sighed.
“For now?” I gasped. “What the hell happened”
“When the bull stomped on his chest, it cracked his ribs and a sharp edge of bone punctured his lung. He’s got a pneumothorax.”
“English, Tori!” I demanded, reaching out for something and finding Max’s hand. He gripped mine tight in support.
“He’s got a collapsed lung,” she replied.
“Oh my God!” I cried, releasing Max and clutching my chest.
“He’s okay at the moment, Mads. He’s on a breathing tube to help until he’s more stable.”
“You just said he was stable!”
“It’s a lung, Maddy. It took a serious beating in that arena. It’s going to need time to repair and until it does, he’s not out of the woods.”
Tears ran down my cheeks. “I need to see him.”
“I figured you would. I’ve already looked and there’s a flight out in three hours. Let me know when you land and I’ll come get you. Stay calm,” she reassured.
“Th-thank you, Tori.”
“See you soon.”
I stared at the phone blankly for a while before I relayed the information to Max and Tilly.
“Come on, let’s get you back,” Max said.
I was running on autopilot. Max drove us back to the ranch and then the girls were helping me pack and bundling me in the car to the airport.
I don’t remember the flight. I don’t even think I called Tori, but she was somehow there waiting for me.
I don’t remember the ride to the hospital or if I even spoke.
I just needed to see him.
And when Tori took me to his room and I saw him lying in that bed, my legs gave out. Tori held me up and walked me over to his bed.
My eyes couldn’t move from the tube sticking out of his mouth. His skin was pale. His strong chest wrapped up tight with gauze.
“He’s doing really well so far. He’s a fighter, Maddy. We just need to wait. I’ll leave you with him,” Tori murmured and then I was seated in a chair beside his bed.
I gingerly reached out, lifting his hand in mine. It was still warm; that gave me some relief.
Seeing him injured had shaken something in me.
The fear I’d always worried over was suddenly front and center.
A serious injury that could have killed him.
Could have taken him away from me. Why was I having to face this already?
We’d barely begun our life together. We’d had decades in each other’s lives, but it wasn’t enough.
I needed more. I couldn’t lose him now, in some ways my life with Leo was only just beginning.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as thoughts flooded my mind.
Different scenarios where I lost him. Where he was injured beyond repair.
Me at his funeral. Me raising our children alone and having to tell them about him.
Tell everyone about the man who stole my heart, so slowly, over the course of two decades, like a subtle thief he came for me.
Made me love him.
And now he could leave me.
Where was the justice in that? Where was the fairness?
“It’s not enough. The time we had wasn’t enough. I need more, I need forever.”
I didn’t know who I was speaking to, just needed to get the words out. Was this how Daddy felt when Mom was taken away too soon?
Agony gripped my heart as I stared at Leo, silent tears running down my cheeks. We both had dangerous jobs, we knew the risks and loved the rewards. It’s who we were, and I would never make him change that.
But I couldn’t stand the thought that we’d not done more.
Not experienced more. We needed more time.
I wanted to live our lives together. To watch as we continued to develop as people, celebrate everything he achieved, witness him become a father.
See him grow old and eventually slow down.
Enjoy retirement together, cheer on our children to succeed and spoil our grandchildren.
Live out the rest of our days in love, before returning to the earth together when the time came.
I wanted to give him everything. All my love. All my life. All of me.
And that alone chased away every fear I had.
“Come back to me. Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me,” I murmured, kissing his hand. “We’ve got a future to plan.”