Chapter 6 #3
The way it was always supposed to be.
“Well, if I didn’t love chocolate mousse before, I certainly do now.”
Connor grinned as he licked the last little bit of mousse off her nipple. “See? Food can be fun.” He sat back and crashed against the pillows beside her. “But I have more that we can actually eat later on.”
Breathless, she laughed. “You really have thought of everything.” Turning her head, she couldn’t help but smile. The day wasn’t even half over, and he had already made it something she would never forget. “Thank you,” she said softly.
He arched one brow at her—which shouldn’t have been sexy, but it was.
“This has been an amazing day,” she admitted quietly. “I was nervous and insecure, and you just made all of those negative feelings go away.”
“I’d say you didn’t need to be nervous or insecure, but I was too.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “Hell, yeah. I’ve been thinking about it ever since you showed up at the resort.” Then he shook his head. “Actually, that’s a lie.”
“Oh?”
“I’ve thought about it ever since that last summer we spent together.
I always regretted the way things ended, and I had created so many scenarios in my head over the years about what would happen if I ever had the chance to be alone with you again.
” He let out a long breath before continuing.
“Every one of them started with me groveling and apologizing and essentially begging for your forgiveness.”
In her mind, she fully agreed that he’d have to do that because of the way he’d hurt her, but she kept that to herself.
“Then we’d talk and realize how we were always meant to be together, and we’d tell the rest of the world to just leave us the fuck alone and they would.
” Turning his head, he gave her a sad smile.
“Or maybe it’s just me telling my family that.
” His expression saddened. “That’s what I should have done back then.
I should have fought for us. By the time I manned up and stood up for myself, I knew it was too late. ”
It wasn’t the first time he’d made that admission, but every time he elaborated a bit more.
“We’ve been over this, Connor,” she softly reminded him. “We can’t keep looking back because it won’t change anything. We’re here now and getting to know each other again.”
“I know and I’m so thankful for it, but I hate how much I cost us.”
She wasn’t sure what to say to that, so she didn’t say anything. The truth was that she did blame him for a lot—well…all the things that had gone wrong in her life since they broke up. He was an easy target, and he couldn’t fight back or tell her she was wrong.
Something her ex did all the time.
According to Adam, she couldn’t do anything right. Ever. That was why her self-esteem was so low and she ended up in the situation she did.
Although…it kind of got her back here, and maybe this is exactly where she was supposed to be.
Or maybe I believe in fairy tales…
Turning onto his side, he studied her. “Do you remember our first time?”
Lexi’s eyes went wide. “Seriously? Of course I do.”
“We were supposed to be at the teen social over in the rec building,” he said, taking one of her hands in his. “I had swiped a couple of blankets and hid them behind the boathouse. We were going to do some stargazing. At least, that’s what we told everyone.”
She remembered it as if it were yesterday.
It was a perfect night for looking at the stars.
No one was allowed near the boathouse after dark, but they ignored the sign.
Hand in hand, they walked the path, thankful no one was around, and set up the blankets on the shore of the lake.
There was a secluded area that you couldn’t see from the main beach area, and that’s where Connor led her.
It was romantic and sweet, and he was incredibly tender.
However…
It was also awkward and clumsy and not the most comfortable place to make love for the first time.
Still, it was a cherished memory. Just like today was.
“I’d ask what made you think of that, but I’m pretty sure I know,” she teased.
“I always regretted that we only got that one night.” His voice was gruff. “I mean, I know we had another entire week that summer, but that was the only time we ever had to ourselves like that.”
“It wasn’t ideal, but it was still special.” Kissing his hand, she snuggled closer. “And this more than made up for it.”
As his arms went around her and they got comfortable, she told herself she’d be perfectly content if they just stayed like this the rest of the day. She was sated and relaxed, and hearing his heartbeat as her head rested on his chest was absolutely perfect.
“You think everyone’s having a good time out there?” he asked. “Like…are our kids making our friends crazy?”
Just the imagery made her laugh. “I know Jonah can be a handful, and I’m honestly a little nervous about how he’ll behave if he gets too tired. I warned Walker, but he assured me everything was under control.”
“Annabeth’s a little easier. I think she was so excited about doing stuff like a grown-up that she’s going to be on her best behavior.”
“You know we’re going to hear stories about this for weeks, right?” she mused.
“Yeah, but it’s worth it.” He paused. “I haven’t exactly been the best dad. I worked so much because I didn’t want to be home with Rachel. And then when she left, I floundered a bit and felt like I had to work to provide for my daughter.”
Lifting her head, she looked at him in disbelief.
“Connor, you’re a multi-millionaire. It wasn’t as if you were living in poverty.
That’s the direction I was heading. Adam left when Jonah was two and rarely paid child support.
I worked my ass off to keep food on the table.
But you? Please. Cry me a river.” She rolled her eyes and then felt bratty for sounding so judgmental.
“Sorry. That wasn’t very nice of me to say. ”
He gently guided her head back down to his chest. “You don’t have to apologize.
You’re one hundred percent right. When the opportunity with the resort came up, I knew I wanted it, and I knew it would be great for Annabeth.
Unfortunately, I had to come here and get things started and to a point where it was safe to have her here.
So she spent a lot of time with my parents and I traveled back and forth and video chatted with her every day. ”
At the mention of his parents, she had to remind herself not to react.
They were snobs, but not to her face. All the years she’d known them, they had been nothing but polite to her, but it was just an act.
Like…they liked her just fine if she and Connor were friends, but apparently she wasn’t good enough to marry into their precious family.
But instead of commenting with that, she simply said, “That was nice. And I’m sure Annabeth loved getting to talk to you.”
“She did, but I felt guilty every damn time.”
They lay in companionable silence again.
“I wish I could give you more than stolen moments,” he said after several long moments.
“I know we have this whole day, and I’m thankful to our friends for helping us, but if given the chance, I’d whisk you away to someplace fabulous where we could be away from it all for days instead of hours.
I’d take you to the best restaurants where we’d drink wine and dance under the stars before going back to a private suite and making love all night. ”
Her hand smoothed over his abs. “That does sound nice, but I’m perfectly content where we are. This room is amazing, the food you brought—even though we only ate a little—has been delicious, and we’ve made love twice already. So…”
“It’s not the same. There’s a clock ticking on our time together, and when that time is up, we have to leave this all behind and go back to the real world.”
“The real world’s not so bad. Not anymore.”
He kissed the top of her head. “You know what I mean. We’ll go to separate cabins tonight, and then our kids need our attention after being out all day today without us, and then Monday’s back to work.
” He groaned. “And then we’ll not only be in countdown mode to the opening but also to Jayce and Kelsey’s wedding.
There isn’t going to be a time like this again for… who knows how long.”
“Or…”
“Or…?”
“Or we take some initiative and make time. I get that we have jobs and kids, but we also have to have boundaries with our work lives.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I get that we’re all friends and we kind of play it fast and loose with the schedule—like there are no normal hours. Not really. However, we’re entitled to lunch breaks where no one bothers us.”
He nodded.
“I know for a fact that Harlow and Walker have asked not to be disturbed during lunch, and so have Axel and Maisie. And what I find funny about both situations is that they all live together! I mean, not all four of them, but…”
“I get what you’re saying, and you’re right. So if they’re entitled to some private time mid-day, so are we.”
Lifting her head, she grinned. “Exactly.”
Reaching up, Connor caressed her cheek. “I like the way you think.”
“Well…it was either come up with a solution or miss out on more of this. And this was far too good to have to wait weeks for it to happen again. I’m afraid you may have created a monster.”
That seemed to please him. “A monster, huh?”
She nodded. “Yup. And weeks are just not going to cut it. I’m not saying we have to lock ourselves in one of our cabins every single day, but I also want to be able to have that option if we want it.”
“Um…if that option’s on the table, then I’m going to want it.”
The giggle was out before she could stop it. “Me too.”
His smile turned sexy. “We don’t have to wait weeks or even for a lunch break right now. We still have eight hours to ourselves. Let’s not waste any of it.” Slowly, he rolled her beneath him and kissed her.
And as she wrapped herself around him once again, she happily gave herself over to the moment.