Chapter 14 #2
“Evie, I…” Pausing, he cleared his throat. “I want to talk about this. I mean, obviously we can’t right here, but…I don’t know…I kind of like that you had an emotional moment and I think we should talk about it when we leave.”
She eyed him warily. “Really?”
Nodding, he gave her a lopsided grin. “Yeah. Really. I don’t want you to hide how you’re feeling, remember? I like the version of you that doesn’t hide.”
Whispering his name, he saw her visibly relax. “Okay. When we get back to the cabin, we’ll talk. But for now, we need to celebrate our friends.”
And because he couldn’t help himself, he leaned in and gave her a quick but thorough kiss. “Deal.”
Taking her by the hand, they walked over to the table to join everyone, Slater held her chair for her before sitting beside her. The conversation was as loud and lively as ever, and as much as he loved nights like this, he knew this wasn’t going to be the norm anymore.
Although he seemed to remember thinking that more than a couple of times before, and here they were.
But…Connor and Lexi’s baby was due in a little over two months, and she wasn’t planning on coming back to work at the resort.
Connor was opening a restaurant in town.
They’d be spending their nights at home as a family.
Walker and Harlow’s resort near West Stockbridge was nearing completion, and they were going to spend the first few months being hands-on with the day-to-day operations.
At least, that’s what they’d been saying, but Walker was still doing consulting work for the luxury resort chain he had been working for, and Harlow was making real estate deals practically wherever she went.
But basically, they were going to be spending less and less time here.
Taking a sip of his wine, he glanced over at Milo and Nora. Yeah, they were going to be hanging out here through the fall, with Milo going back to Seattle every once in a while, but never for long. And once they were married, it was anyone’s guess if they were going to keep the logistics the same.
“I think we’re going to have to start looking at houses at some point,” Maisie was saying. “The owner’s suite is fine for just us, and I know we can use the second bedroom as a nursery, but eventually, we’re going to need space of our own with a yard.”
“We definitely want to get a dog,” Axel added. “I don’t know about puppy training with a baby, but it would be cool as hell for them to grow up together.”
Slater couldn’t help but smile because that was such a great image—Axel, Maisie, a baby, and a dog in a place of their own. Axel deserved to have all those things.
Do I? he wondered.
Evie reached over and rested her hand on his thigh and gave it a gentle squeeze. When he looked over at her, she looked completely relaxed and serene. He draped his arm along the back of her chair, and he swore they could communicate without words.
I wish we were alone at the cabin.
Me too. But it’s nice to be here with everyone.
It would be nicer if time would speed up so we could leave.
Patience. We’ll be there soon enough.
Leaning over, he kissed her cheek before settling in for an evening with his friends. Connor began placing giant casserole dishes on the table, with Walker and Harlow helping.
“I know it’s not overly fancy or creative, but I went old-school Italian tonight,” he announced. “Lasagna, meatballs, sausage, salad, and garlic bread. Buon appetito!”
Slater served Evie and then himself, and it didn’t take long for him to forget about watching the time because things were good right where they were.
They got back to the cabin later than usual, and as much as she hated to admit it, she was exhausted. Between work, packing, rambunctious sex, and then an amazing Italian dinner complete with cookies and gelato for dessert, Evie was ready to fall asleep.
“Penny for your thoughts,” Slater said as he closed the door behind them.
She let out a happy sigh. “This was a good night. No…a great one. The perfect way to end my stay here at the Lakeview Harbor Resort.”
Toeing off her shoes, she kicked them aside and stretched. When she faced Slater, she saw he was still standing by the door, watching her.
“How about a penny for yours?” she teased as she sat down.
He didn’t move right away, but she could tell there was definitely something on his mind. She just couldn’t tell how serious it was.
When he finally stepped toward her, his expression bordered on somber, and she hated that they were going to end the night like that.
“Slater…”
Shaking his head, he sat down beside her. “I hated that you apologized for your feelings earlier,” he said carefully. “But more than that, I’m sorry if I made you feel you had to.”
Relief washed over her. “Is that all?” she asked with a small laugh.
“That really didn’t have anything to do with you.
That’s kind of what I do no matter who I’m with.
I’m not big on public displays of emotion.
No one in my family is. Unless it’s joy and happiness.
That I can do in abundance and with no apologies.
But anything negative, I try to keep to myself. ”
Reaching for her hand, he took it in his. “You’re doing it again.”
“I’m not…”
“And that’s wrong, Evie. You’re allowed to have emotions. You’re allowed to have negative thoughts and feelings and express them. I hate seeing you shrink away like you’re not entitled.” Pausing, he let out a soft sigh. “But you know what I hate most of all?”
She shook her head.
“I hate that I’ve been doing the same thing.
I don’t…” He paused and took a moment to organize his thought.
“I don’t say the things that I’m feeling because they’re things I’ve never felt or said before.
And when you started crying earlier, there were plenty of things that I should have said, but I was too much of a coward to say them. ”
Her heart began to race, but she wasn’t sure if the next thing out of his mouth was going to make or break all of her romantic dreams.
“This last month with you has been like something I never knew existed. For the last few years, you’ve been a friend, someone I enjoyed talking to and hanging out with.
When Milo told me he wanted to bring you back to the resort, I was totally on board with it because it meant we’d get to hang out more.
But once you were here, I knew I didn’t only want your friendship, but I was afraid to do anything to change our dynamic. I didn’t want to lose you.”
“You never would have. With the way our logistics are…”
With his free hand, he placed a finger over her lips. “I really need to say this.”
So she nodded.
“The night we played trivia and you jumped into my arms, I could no longer pretend that you were just a friend. I was so damn attracted to you and I was tired of pretending I wasn’t.
But with my history, I was still afraid of messing things up between us.
” Lowering his hand, he caressed her jaw.
“You showed me that it’s possible to cross some lines and have it turn into something amazing. You are something amazing.”
Tears stung her eyes because this all sounded like it was leading up to everything she ever wanted. She wanted to join the conversation, but he wasn’t done yet, and she had to just bide her time.
“Tonight, when you said you wanted all the things that everyone in the room had, it scared the crap out of me. I keep thinking of us in terms of the here and now or in the near future. I think about going with you to Seattle.”
Her heart leaped for joy!
“But marriage and babies…well…that’s some heavy shit, and I don’t know if I can commit to that.”
And just like that, Evie felt herself deflate.
Hard.
“I’m not saying it’ll never happen, but…I don’t want to lead you on, especially knowing how you feel and what you want.”
“And this is why I keep things to myself,” she murmured, putting a little space between them.
“No,” he said. “Don’t do that. Don’t…” Pausing, he let out a growl of frustration.
“I’m telling you, I’m really bad at this stuff because I’ve never done it before.
” Another pause and another huff. “You mean everything to me, Evie. Even thinking about spending a day without you is something I don’t want to consider.
I just…I’m asking you to be patient with me, that’s all. Just…know that I’m trying.”
He sounded so earnest, and she knew none of this was easy for him to say or to admit, so that counted for something, right?
“Say something,” he quietly prompted.
“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to say,” she admitted.
“It sounds like you’re willing to try us having something beyond what we’ve had here, but I don’t know what comes with that.
Are you moving to Seattle? Coming for a visit?
Are we going to do a long-distance thing like Milo and Nora tried?
Do you want me to move here? Or are you going to go back to bouncing around the country working for different tour companies and you’ll fit me in when you have time?
Am I supposed to quit my job and go with you?
Like…I don’t know what trying looks like. ”
Shaking his head, he laughed softly. “I know I said I hate when you shrink and don’t speak your mind, but those were so many questions.”
“Slater…”
“I know, I know. I’m just teasing. Sort of,” he added with a wink.
“I don’t know what it’s going to look like.
I wish I did. In my head, I’m following you to Seattle after you get back from your brother’s wedding.
I…I need time to figure some stuff out and see what’s out there for me.
I know I don’t particularly enjoy living in a big city, but maybe we can find a place just outside of it, a place that belongs to the both of us. ”
The first twinges of hope were back.
“I’d like that. My apartment is near the office, but it’s never felt like home, so…the idea of finding something with you sounds wonderful.”
Now he visibly relaxed.