31. Mia
Chapter thirty-one
Mia
To say I’m flustered when I arrive at my first official meeting with the staff at Montagne étoilée is an understatement. My flight from London to France was delayed due to fog. Even though Abigail, who arrived at the airport on time, has arranged a shuttle and for my luggage to be delivered to the resort later, we run in with only moments to spare, with me questioning my ability to make a complete sentence, let alone convincingly run a multi-billion-dollar resort chain.
At the Q the thing I’m focused on is getting to know you all and understanding what we’re doing well, and where we can see things can be improved’.
By the time Damien, Abigail and I meet in Damien’s office, a hot blush of shame has crept over me. There is no way I’m cut out for this. I must be stupid to even try. Fuck Will for convincing me I should. Though I wish he was here. Him giving me real time feedback would be so helpful.
“You’ve got to give yourself some more credit, Mia. At least as much credit as those people out there did,” Abigail says, lowering herself elegantly onto the couch next to me. My emotions are obviously playing out across my face.
Damien nods. “No one expected perfection. They just wanted to see someone genuine. Someone who is not like Bryce. And you did that.”
At least they don’t humor me, tell me that things are fine. I can be grateful for that, at least. It doesn’t take away the impostor syndrome coursing through me, but at least I have people in my corner willing to be honest.
I only have a few days at Montagne étoilé, meeting and greeting staff, getting to know the processes. Abigail and I spend every spare moment working on how we were going to work together. She’s impressed by the plan Will has helped me put together (he has even converted my whiteboard into a couple of A3s which makes my corporate brain scream in protest, but I have to admit, they do make me look extremely professional), and together, we flesh it out in more detail, dividing the tasks between us.
Working with Abigail is a dream. Will was right; she’s helpful from day one.
“So, what’s it been like, these last few months?” Abigail asks over lunch. We’re sitting right in the corner of the restaurant with a great view out the window. Tiny bright-colored blobs that are skiers and snowboarders; zoom their way down from the peaks.
I sigh. “It’s been…different. I’ve been so focused on not letting it change me, but it turns out, life has changed around me anyway.”
Abigail tilts her head, offering me a tight smile. “I can’t imagine. You were sure about not telling people other than your parents, and Will, right? He’s the guy who came to see you in Bern? How’s that been?”
I toy with my fork. I don’t know how to answer. It feels pathetic, to not feel confident enough to tell my best friends about the reality of what’s happening to me. What am I even worried about, really? They love me. I know they love me. That isn’t going to change. “I’ve still only told Will and my parents.” I squirm in my chair, uncomfortable. “I’m going to have to tell them now I’ve stopped working for a while because I try to never miss a Wednesday night quiz, and now with the travel, I’m going to have to. But I don’t know how.”
Abigail pushes her quiche around her plate, slight frown across her forehead. After a few moments, she asks, “I think you’re right about telling them. And I bet you’ll feel a whole lot better when you do. Why not tell them on your Christmas trip?”
I sigh, pushing my hair back off my face. I can’t put it off too much longer. “You’re right. It’s as good an opportunity as any.”
Mia
I found a message from Matt last night that I hadn’t responded to in three days
I am dropping the ball on everything in my life
Will
you’re too hard on yourself. they’re your best friends, Mia. they know this time of year is busy.
Just a heads up, I’m going to ask about the Christmas trip today. Planning for next weekend – I just hope everyone can make it.
Will doesn’t respond for nearly ten minutes, and I’m concerned my plan is going to fall through. Everything is difficult right now. I missed this weeks’ quiz night without warning my friends, because it completely slipped my mind. I’m less responsive in the group chat, and I’m falling asleep before dealing with any of my messages, thanks to late-night or early-morning meetings creating ever-present jet lag.
Eventually, he responds, saying he and Matt will make it ‘no matter what’. It sounds disconcertingly like a threat, but I’ll take it.
Mia
Hi guys, I’m so sorry I was AWOL this week. I’ve booked a cabin in the woods (it’s beautiful, Steph, you’ll love it!) for next weekend, and I really want to hang out with you guys. I know it’s close to Christmas, but please come hang out with me. Love you all.
Matt
I’m in, but I’ll only watch 1 xmas movie.
Will
in, and idc how many xmas movies I watch
Chloe
Steph has a giant list of them
Thanks guys. Chloe, Steph, you in?
Steph
reporting for duty! I’ll dig out my list, but fair warning, I’ve watched a lot this year already.
Chloe
Well if everyone else is going, it’d be rude to say no.
Matt
Love you too, Clo.
I’m grateful it didn’t take much begging or wrangling to get everyone to agree to come. Steph quickly dubs it ‘Friendsmas’.
At Abigail’s suggestion, I had booked the cabin for an extra night, and Abigail hired decorators to come in a day early so we’ll arrive to a true winter wonderland. I tell everyone we got a great deal on the cabin (which is true—this close to Christmas, I think the owners had given up on that particular weekend’s revenue). After some argument, I take a token amount from my friends to contribute to the cost of the rental. Abigail has used that to organize a massive delivery of food and alcohol to keep us entertained all weekend.
We agree there will be no work talk (this is mostly aimed at Will), we’ll put aside our concerns about our ‘real’ family Christmases (Chloe in particular is very concerned about seeing her sexist uncle), Steph promises that she won’t talk incessantly about her new boyfriend, I promise to be flexible and not be ‘type-A’ if plans change, and Matt promises not to gloat about his planned new year holiday to Australia. He’s leaving a couple of weeks after Christmas, and we are all disgustingly jealous about him jetting off to a new year in the sun.
And I have promised myself I’m going to tell them I’m running the resorts.