36. Mia
Chapter thirty-six
Mia
I leave London for Sternenschein Alpenlodge the same day we get home from Friendsmas. I planned this trip so I will only be in Switzerland for two nights and will be back home in time for our final quiz of the year.
It was so nice spending the weekend with my friends, and my conversation with Will…well, that has changed the game. Being upfront about my feelings is something there’s no coming back from, but it was a weekend that demanded bravery, and I delivered. I still haven’t been able to work out what’s going on with Chloe. Maybe it was my imagination, but I’m certain she avoided being alone with me for the rest of the weekend, and that tone of hers keeps reverberating in my head. I’m dreading seeing her at quiz night.
I run the same discovery sessions with staff in Switzerland at the Montagne étoilé in France. Will and Abigail helped with the design of the sessions, and so far, they’ve been successful. The idea behind them is to understand where the resort currently is, the existing tension points, and to collect information on how they think the resort can change to better provide for staff and customers. My plan is to make my way through the remaining five resorts over the next two months, then I want to have a couple of months where Abigail and I can synthesize the information we have collected and put together a plan for each resort, then an overarching strategic plan. Simple.
If all goes well, by the end of my six-month stint, I will have a clear action plan to hand over to the new manager we will hire, and I’ll go back to my real job and my normal life.
The discovery session goes well, much better than my first one in Montagne étoilé. Abigail and I have a quiet dinner together then I head up to my room early, pleading tiredness from Friendsmas weekend.
In truth, I’m homesick. Even though I’m only going to be at Sternenschein Alpenlodge for a couple of days, and I don’t normally get homesick, I find myself missing home more than previous trips away. But it’s nothing that a bubble bath can’t fix.
As I wait for the bath to fill, I can’t get Will out of my mind. He likes me. He has liked me for years. Have I wasted all this time we could have been together? At least having some alone time in the evenings gives me time to work out my feelings about a relationship with him. Every part of my heart wants to jump in with both feet. If we’ve both liked each other for this long, how bad could it be? I’m so certain now that he is my person. But a little part of my brain, the small, scared part of me has put the brakes on. What if I put my heart out there and he says no? He said he’d wait, but what if he changes his mind? Now it’s up to my heart to convince my head to take the leap.
And if I don’t have enough to worry about, I’ve been worried about Chloe since Friendsmas. She started off full of energy, but once I shared my news, she got mean. Even when we were playing ‘never have I ever’, a little cruel streak I don’t often see in her had come out, and I’m still not sure why. I have a horrible feeling it was related to my news, but I can’t figure out why that would be. Surely her being weird was just the general lead-up to Christmas.
I brought both a book and my phone to the bath with me.
Mia
Hey Clo, want to grab lunch on Thursday? I was thinking of trying that new bao place. Maybe do some last minute Christmas shopping afterwards?
I don’t want to try a new lunch place, but I hope by offering, Chloe will know I’m making a real effort. Chloe finally messages me back fifteen minutes into my bath.
Chloe
I can’t make Thursday.
Friday? Next week?
Sorry, I’m really busy right now.
I slump back into the bath. How worried should I be? Her messages are short, with none of her usual banter, or any explanation of why she can’t make it, no alternative times we could meet. That’s not normal for Chloe. I message Steph.
Mia
Do you know what’s up with Chloe? She’s blowing me off for lunch.
Steph:
I think she’s just busy.
Well, that's unhelpful.
I lay back in the bath, abandoning my book, and instead, try to plan the next couple of months of travel.
The next resorts I will be traveling to are in Italy, Canada and Austria. I met one or two staff and the resort managers for a short period at Craig’s living memorial. Thinking about visiting them feels quite different to here, or France, where I have already met a chunk of the workers and at least know my way around. After those, I have one other resort to visit in Switzerland, and of course, New Zealand.
Abigail will be coming with me on all but the Italy trip, the next one on my list. When we discussed it, Abigail suggested I ask Will to come with me. At the time, I had dismissed the idea, but after our conversation during Friendsmas, I’m beginning to come around to the idea. He knows the plan for the sessions we will be running—they were practically his idea—and I have no doubt that he would be just as good, if not better than Abigail to bounce ideas off afterwards.
As I think about it more, I wonder, not for the first time, whether it makes sense to simply hire him full-time to advise on the future direction of the resorts. Between me, him and Abigail, we could make quite the team. He has the exact skills I’m looking for help with, and I know he’s been thinking about taking a break from his usual run of clients anyway. I’ll have to take some time to think about it. Maybe Abigail will have more thoughts on it after the second resort visit.
I land back at Gatwick right at five pm, which means crawling my way through town at rush hour. The second I buckle myself into the taxi, I pull out my phone.
Mia
Dinner before quiz anyone?
Steph
I’m in!
Will
Sure
Matt
Why not
I’ll book. Clo, you keen?
I had booked a table at our usual dinner spot (I’m nothing but a creature of habit, after all) and let Chloe know I included her in the booking. As we inch our way closer to the city, I reflect on my upcoming resort visits.
I’m going to be heading to Chalet Stellare in Italy early in the new year. Despite me begging her earlier today, Abigail hasn’t been able to change her plans and come along, which means unless I do as she suggests and ask Will to come with me, I’ll be going alone.
Even though I’ve only visited two resorts so far, Abigail and I have gotten into a solid rhythm so far. It’s useful for her to record notes of the sessions, and her commentary afterwards is always invaluable. The idea of trying to manage all of that by myself is overwhelming. Abigail and I aren’t doing it alone though. Will agreed to review our notes after each visit. He’s been using the notes to slowly build up a picture of what are common issues to the resorts, and which ones are novel problems. From there, he promised, he’ll be able to help build a good picture of where to best start for the most impact.
He’s been so helpful. I just wish he would accept some money for it. He’s planning to take January and February off work but has agreed to keep helping me out. But especially when he isn’t bringing in any other money, I wish he’d take mine. God knows I have more than enough. Besides, without his support, there's no way I’d be doing this. Bryce would still be running the resorts into the ground.
Chloe doesn’t show up to dinner, and she doesn’t message to say she can’t make quiz until ten minutes before it starts. I force down the worry that’s brewing in me. Chloe hasn't missed a quiz in, what, more than a year? The last time she missed quiz was because she was sick, but tonight is the last quiz of the year; a big event. I’m sure she said she planned on coming when we chatted about it over the weekend.
“Is Clo okay, do you know?” I ask Steph as we walk the block to the bar. I keep my voice low. I don’t want Will and Matt to overhear and start a big thing.
Steph looks down at her feet, grasping the straps of her backpack with each hand. “I think she’s fine. Maybe she just has some stuff on tonight.” Her eyes stay trained on the ground.
“The last night of quiz before Christmas?” I hold the door to the bar for her. She mutters a thanks without looking at me. Is she avoiding looking at me? Is there something going on I don’t know about? Or am I right, and Chloe has been weird since I shared my news, and Steph knows and doesn’t want to talk about it? I don’t have any time to ruminate because we arrive at quiz with only a few minutes to spare. That doesn’t stop the pit in my stomach from growing, especially when I notice Chloe hadn’t even responded to my message asking whether everything is okay.
Matt stands right after quiz ends. “Jesus that was a terrible showing. I can’t stick around tonight, sorry team.”
“We’re nothing without Clo, turns out,” Will says, standing up too. “Another drink, Mia? Steph, are you staying?”
I nod. I’ll stick around for a bit. Steph and Matt gather their things and head out.
“So, I wanted to ask you something,” I say as Will gets back to the table. He grunts, sliding my beer over, then sits. I look around me to make sure no one is listening in, though, to be honest, I don’t know why anyone would be. I lower my voice anyway. “I’ve got to head to Chalet Stellare in Italy just after the New Year. Abigail can’t make it, and I'm hoping you’d be willing to come along.” I pick up my drink. “I’d pay for travel, and your time, of course. Whatever your rate is. I need someone to take some notes, and it would be so helpful to have you there.” It comes out in a rush.
A frown creeps across Will’s face. “First week of January? I’m sure I can help out,” he says, spreading his massive hands on the table, pressing his wrist up to crack his fingers. “If you cover travel and accommodation, I’m happy to come. No need to pay me.”
“Will, you’re spending so much time helping me out. Of course I should be paying you.” I know he’d say he’s doing it as a favor, that he doesn’t mind helping, but I feel like I'm taking advantage of him. And it is true that he doesn't mind, I’m sure, but that hardly makes me feel any better about it.
“I’m not fighting you on this one, Limpet. Travel and accommodation only, those are my terms.” His voice is almost a growl. Heat grows between my thighs as I recall the last time he spoke to me like that. “Take it or leave it.”
“Okay,” I say, my voice breathy. God is that all it takes to get me this worked up? Some mildly stern words? “Okay. Flights and accommodation it is.”