Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
THE HEATHEN
Psycho, Bones and Reaper leave for the night and finally I’m alone with my men. Well, other than Grave tied to a tree but he’s in and out of consciousness anyway.
We are staying here tonight in an open field. When we first made this decision Killian and Knox both expressed their displeasure in roughing it. Carter has spent many nights in the woods so he didn’t care. I lived in the woods before he found me so it’s nothing new.
Kill glances around the mostly bare property, a question looming in his eyes.
“What are we going to do for a bathroom?”
I look at Carter who, much like myself, tries to hide his grin.
“Oh don’t worry, princess. There are plenty of places in the woods if you need to tinkle.”
His response is a low growl and my insides light up like the fourth of July.
“Careful, baby. Be very fucking careful.”
I shrug my shoulders and flash him my best bratty smile.
“You’re still injured, sir. What are you going to do about it?”
Knox chuckles, clearly enjoying our bickering.
“Tesoro. It’s not nice to pick on the unwell.”
Killian shoots him a glare as he grumbles under his breath.
“I’ll show you both unwell.”
The laughter fades and I spot Carter lost in thought.
“Everything okay?” I ask and Knox says, “A penny for your thoughts.”
Carter drags his hand down his face, the anxiety visible in his dark eyes.
“I’ve been wondering what Grave said to Kill during the fight. I remember seeing them talking and Kill looking furious. And I just wondered.”
Killian glares at his brother, his eyes are intense as he issues a warning.
“Carter enough.”
I glance at him and can’t understand why he’s so angry.
“Why won’t you tell us? I think it’s a fair question.”
He shakes his head in response.
“Don’t. I promise you don’t want to know. And even more so, I don’t want to have this conversation. Fucking let it go.”
I get up and walk over to him and crawl on his lap, facing him. The storm brewing in his eyes says far more than he is willing to.
Pressing my hands to his face I stare into his gaze as it softens for me.
“There isn’t only one victim here. I know how hard this has been on all of you.
I can only imagine what it was like for you when you found me.
And whatever Grave said to you, if you don’t want to talk about it, that’s okay.
But if you do, I promise I’ll be okay. He’s vile and honestly nothing he says would even surprise me. ”
Killian wraps his arms around me and lowers his forehead to my shoulder.
“He said he was going to fuck you with a branding iron and destroy what was left of your cunt. When I warned him to not even speak about you-“
Killian exhales a long breath fanning over my skin.
“He said he would videotape it and force us to watch him torturing you. Vile doesn’t begin to describe him. Grave had every intention of killing all of us but he wanted the three of us to experience the worst thing imaginable before we died.”
I turn to the sound of movement behind me and am surprised to see Knox standing with clenched fists. His gaze is darker than I’ve ever seen. The rage is visible as he walks to the tree where Grave is tied.
We all get up and go after him. Knox pulls his fist back and punches him in the gut. He wakes with a pained grunt.
“Fuck!” He yells and Knox pulls his fist back again, landing a punch to the right side of his jaw. The audible snap echoes through the quiet area.
Killian and Carter try to stop me as I move closer but I push them both away.
I place my hand on his back attempting to calm him down.
All three of my men have been patient and kind with me but it didn’t come without a personal cost for them.
I may be the only one that was beaten and raped but they were affected too.
I can’t imagine walking in on what they did.
“Knox, I’m okay. It’s only words. None of those things happened.”
He turns around, facing me, and hangs his head down.
“Tesoro. Only because we found you first. If we hadn’t-“
I wrap my arms around his waist and he does the same to me.
“I know but you did. I’m here, safe and really don’t want him to die tonight. It’s too easy. He needs to suffer.”
Lifting his head, he gazes at me, his eyes filled with love and it causes my heart to pound.
“Tesoro.”
He bends down and scoops me into his arms and carries me back to our spot on the grass. Sitting down, he holds me on his lap.
“I’m the only one who hasn’t kissed you today.”
Placing my hands behind his neck, I scrape my nails over his flesh.
“Jealous?”
He nods.
“Very.”
I press my face against his neck and place soft kisses against his skin.
“Jealousy is dangerous, Knox. You should do something before it’s too late.”
Tilting my head back, I stare into his eyes, the heat between us intense.
“Tesoro.” He groans as he presses his lips to mine. Sliding a hand into my hair he becomes more aggressive with his kiss. His tongue slides against mine as he tightens his hand in my hair.
“Fuckkk.” I hear Carter say behind me, and as hot as he sounds, I panic.
I pull back from Knox and hurriedly admit, “I’m not ready for sex. I know it has been months. I’m sorry.”
He shakes his head at me.
“There’s no timeline, Tesoro. Nor is there a need for an apology. When you’re ready, we will be here. Until then, we are content with holding you and kissing you.”
I lie my head on his shoulder and inhale his scent. It’s quiet out here, there's no traffic, only the occasional sound of animals in the forest scampering about.
Kill and Carter move closer as I sigh a sound of contentment. Turning around on his lap, I reach out and they both take one of my hands.
Killian clears his throat, his eyes slightly fearful as if he’s afraid of upsetting me.
“We can have the marks covered up. Have you ever thought about getting a tattoo? Maybe something meaningful?”
I nod and wipe the tears falling down my cheek.
“I think the physical reminder is why I can’t move forward. I’m stuck. Can I see yours?”
Killian reaches behind his head and pulls his shirt off and moves closer. I run my fingers over the purple petals before tracing the letters of the words above it.
Living without you is my punishment.
“Will you get this covered up now?”
“No.” He says one word, but there’s so much pain in the tone of his voice.
“Pretending history doesn’t exist is dangerous. The way we don’t repeat mistakes is by remembering and honoring the past. As painful as it is, I don't want to forget what I did to you before. It serves as an important reminder of everything I almost lost.”
I don’t want him to torture himself with those memories, but I understand, and have to respect his choices.
“I want three roses on my stomach. One for each of you. I’m not sure about what to put on my ass.”
It’s unbelievable that I even have to do this. As I sit here thinking about what has been done to me, the fury grows again. I glance over at the tree holding Grave in place, and I know I said I wanted to wait until ?morning, but I can’t.
“I’m ready for round two.”
“No.” Killian says and I tilt my head at him in response.
“No?”
He shakes his head and flashes me a stern glare, leaving no room for argument.
“No. You need sleep first. This man is the first of many, and it’s important that you are taking care of yourself and getting adequate rest.”
I want to argue with him, but I know he’s right.
“Carter, wake Knox up in three hours. Knox, wake me up three hours after that.”
Knox strokes his hand through my hair as I feel his heartbeat against my skin. It’s soothing and lulls me into sleep.
Three hours later, when Knox wakes, I crawl into Carter's arms. He kisses the side of my head and tightens his arms around my back.
I never want to be away from them again.
Not even for a single night. The warmth of my men, the sound of their gentle breaths, it all makes me feel so safe.
Knox stares at me, only a few feet away, his gaze is warm yet stern.
“Go back to sleep, Tesoro.”
My eyelashes flutter as I close my eyes, knowing when I wake they’ll still be here.
Watching me.
Protecting me.
And loving me.