Rewind

Chapter 1

Chapter

One

A mina’s hands shook as she pulled the keys out of her purse and unlocked the front door. If she wasn’t so shaken up, from having a gun pointed in her face, she’d be angry at her husband for not answering his phone.

She was a fool to believe he’d follow through with his promise to pick her up after her shift considering she’d been scheduled to work past midnight. These extra shifts at her second job, after all, were a result of her needing to pay off the debt he’d raked up on their credit cards.

It had been a year since he’d totaled his car under a mysterious circumstance, he’d never shared with her. And since then, he took her car whenever he pleased, forcing her to rely on public transportation to get back and forth from work. It was easier to catch the bus and train to get to her day time job, but it was trickier with the second one she’d recently taken.

Working at a gas station at night in a sketchy part of town wasn’t an ideal situation for anyone but they paid a decent wage and she’d been hired on the spot. She was desperate enough to take it, thinking it would only be a temporary thing. Now here she was nearly a year later and this place had been robbed twice. The first time, she had been in the back taking inventory of the stock, while the cashier was held up in front.

This time she had been at the cash register and there was no Plexiglas window for protection because it had been damaged in a prior incident and the owner had not gotten around to replacing it.

The worst part wasn’t having her life threatened while she stared down the barrel of a pistol, but calling her husband after the police statements were given, to come pick her up only to be sent directly to voicemail. She left three messages and texted.

He left her on read.

So he knew the gas station had been robbed, yet he ignored it.

The last bus and train had already run for the night and she was forced to call an Uber, and pay with money she barely had.

Her chest burned with rage to see her car in the driveway along with another car she didn’t recognize. The blasting of loud hip hop music reached her before she opened the door.

Was he having a party this late? On a weeknight? And then another thought crossed her mind. There was only one other car. Could it belong to another woman?

She’s suspected there could be someone else judging by the way Mark guarded his phone like it was the gold in Fort Knox. And how he always had errands to run, yet he’d come home with nothing to show from them. There were also the many times he’d start an argument just so he could walk out the house and be gone for hours and sometimes days at a time.

And each time she voiced her suspicious, she was either gaslit into thinking she was the crazy one or smacked in the face. The last time resulted in a black eye that her concealer could barely cover.

She wore an eye patch to work to hide it and claimed she had scratched her cornea.

For the first time in a very long time, an anger she hadn’t allowed herself to feel out of fear for her safety, encapsulated her. She’d given her everything to make this marriage work, only to be lied to, emotionally, financially and physically abused.

She stormed into the house and was met with the pungent scent of weed. Clothes were strewn along the floor. She caught sight of a lacy pink bra that didn’t belong to her, on top of the coffee table in the living room.

Hot blood coursed through her body and a vein throbbed in her forehead as she hurried up the steps, taking two at a time. The door to the bedroom she shared with Mark was wide open, saving her from kicking it in.

Amina already had an idea of what she’d find inside that room, but the literal breath was stolen from her lungs at the sight that greeted her. Lying in bed, nonchalantly smoking a joint was her husband Mark, buck naked with her cousin Candace, lying next to him in an equal state of undress.

Their glazed eyes were fixed on the television mounted on the wall that played a music video of a rap artist she didn’t recognize. The room was laced with the scent of marijuana, ass and rotten fish. Nausea roiled her stomach and she fought the keep the bile from traveling up her throat.

With her hand over her mouth, she walked further into the room, carried by despair and rage. It was only when she stood at the foot of the bed did they realize she was even there.

To her annoyance, neither of them seemed to be a bit shamed by being caught in bed together after they’d clearly just had sex.

Mark squinted at the smoke he casually blew into the air. “You’re blocking the television.”

Candace giggled. “No wonder the room suddenly got so dark.”

Amina flinched. This wasn’t the first time her cousin made a disparaging comment about her melanin rich skin but this dig was the perpetual straw that broke the camel’s back.

“Are you two kidding? Mark, what the fuck? You’ve made excuse after excuse for not finding a job because of your bad back, but your bad back didn’t stop you from fucking my cousin who once literally spread her legs because some guy offered her a cheeseburger.”

“And I fucked your man real good too. What are you going to do about it?” Candace taunted, crossing her arms over her surgically enhanced breasts. An evil smirk tilted her lips and her hazel eyes twinkled with malice.

“You can get the fuck out of my house. And you can go with her Mark. I have had it with you. Get out and take this skank with you.”

Mark unmoved by Amina’s words, took another puff from his joint. He slowly exhaled, sending a puff of smoke in her direction. “The fuck are you going about? This is my house. I ain’t going no damn where.”

“My grandmother left this house to me and I want you out of it.”

He shrugged with a chuckled. “You added my name to the deed, you dumb bitch. Like I said, I’m not going anywhere.”

Candace’s shrill giggle punctuated the total disregard either of them had for her as a human being. This was clearly a joke to the both of them.

This anger burning inside Amina’s chest finally gave her the courage to say what she’d been holding on to for longer than she cared to remember. “What kind of man are you?”

He swiveled his head in her direction with a cutting glare? “The fuck did you say? You need to watch your fucking mouth.”

“Or what? You’re going to hit me? You may be stronger than me, but you’ll always be a weak mama’s boy who takes advantage of women because you’re not man enough to stand on your own two feet. You are such a loser and I don’t understand what I ever saw in you!” Amina screamed at him with a force that made her chest rumble.

Besides the blaring of the television, no sound was made. Mark’s mouth fell open, clearly surprised Amina had the courage to speak up to him.

The silence stretched as Amina and Mark locked eyes, but with each passing second, she realized the danger she’d put herself in. His fists clenched and his lips curled into a snarl.

“Damn, you gonna let her talk to you like that?” Candace instigated.

“Bitch, you clearly forgot who I am!” Mark roared as he jumped off the bed.

With adrenaline coursing through her body, Amina sped out the room and bounded down the stairs with Mark on her heels.

She’d never spoken to him like that before and though she didn’t regret it, she realized it would cost her if she didn’t get away. Not only did she dare to stand up for herself, she did it in front of Candace whom she knew he had a crush on from the moment they met.

Just as she made it to the front door, Mark grabbed her by the hair and yanked her back with so much force, she stumbled to the floor.

Not giving Amina a chance to crawl away, Mark pounced on top of her and swiftly issued a stinging back backhand. “I don’t know who the fuck you think you were talking to but I will fucking kill you if you ever buck up to me again.”

Smack!

The second slap was delivered with so much force, stars danced before her eyes. The metallic taste of blood coated the inside of her mouth.

She pushed his shoulders to get him off of her but he wouldn’t budge.

“Oh? You trying to fight back? What the fuck did I just stay?”

He circled her throat with his hands and squeezed with what seemed to be every bit of his strength.

Amina opened her mouth to scream but no sound came out. Her lungs burned from lack of oxygen and dark dots danced before her eyes.

Was this the end?

She was briefly tempted to give in to the sweet embrace of death’s arms where she’d no longer feel the constant pain of living. The daily agony, the stress, the heartache. When it was all over, she’d no longer be in despair. But just as quickly as that thought crossed her mind, a spark from deep within ignited, awakening her will to fight.

She clawed at the hands wrapped tightly around her neck.

He released his grip but a heavy fist that had the impact of a brick connected with her nose, followed by a sickening crunch. “Bitch, who the fuck do you think you are? You think you’re tough now?” demanded the enraged demon straddling her with the seeming intent to kill.

Mark’s face twisted into an angry caricature of itself and he bore his teeth, like a rabid beast, giving him every bit the appearance of something evil.

Pain splintered throughout her entire body and the pull of darkness grew stronger.

Yes, she was certain this would be the day she’d die.

One would think by the anger radiating from her attacker that they were the aggrieved party. Probably in his twisted mind he was, but Amina was simply a convenient punching bag for whenever he needed to vent some of his many frustrations in life, either real or imaginary.

Maybe this was her fault for accepting this for so long and not leaving the first time he put his hands on her. How had this escalated to this point? What happened to the kind man who would give her sweet compliments and put a smile on her face? How had the disrespect become so normalized that he thought nothing of sleeping with her cousin in their bed and not giving a single damn.

When did her Prince Charming turn into a monster?

Was it around the time he wiped out their joint accounts to pay off gambling debts he’d racked up? Or was it when he lost his job for missing too many days to go to the horse tracks? Maybe it was when he began to show deference to her cousin Candace whom they’d taken into their home…no her home, as a favor?

Candace.

That was another betrayal for her to swallow on top of everything else. Ever since they were children, Candace went out of her way to make her feel unworthy of love, unattractive and a loser. Amina’s mistake was thinking her cousin had changed and wanted to repair their relationship when Candace had come to her begging for help and an occasional place to stay when things were unstable in her life.

But in the end it was all just a ruse. Candace was a user and a horrible person just like the rest of her family. Flashes of her life played like a movie in the back of Amina’s mind.

From a young age, all she knew was neglect and abuse. Her father had been in the military and died overseas shortly after she was born. Unable to handle raising her child alone, Amina’s mother ushered a series of ‘uncles’ into her life. Some were okay, some were creepy and others were downright scary and violent.

The last one ended up killing her mother leaving Amina in the hands of the foster system. When she was eight, she was claimed by her mother’s older sister. Amina thought she’d be a part of a real family that consisted of her aunt, uncle and three cousins.

Instead of being cherished like a valued member of the family, she was treated little better than a slave. She did most of the cooking and cleaning, all while her aunt made Amina express her gratitude for them taking her in. She had been a modern-day Cinderella, only clothed in hand-me-downs, and made to eat alone in the kitchen away from the rest of the family. She didn’t even have her own bedroom. She had to sleep on the living room floor in with a tattered comforter and one of her cousin’s discarded, drool-stained pillows.

That all changed when she was 13 and her paternal grandmother found her and fought for custody. Those years with her grandmother were the happiest Amina had ever experience. Grandma had been eccentric and heavily into the occult but she was loving and for the first time in her life, Amina felt safe and happy.

When her grandmother was taken away from her by illness, Mark entered the picture to fill the void.

Little did Amina know, welcoming Mark into her life would ultimately be her downfall.

There was one face that flashed in her mind that took her by surprise. Her former boss. He had always been kind to her and she wished she had the courage to be as friendly toward him as the rest of her coworkers. He seemed like a nice person and had very kind eyes.

No!

She couldn’t give up just yet. She could hear grandmother’s voice that screamed, “fight!”

Using a move she’d seen in an action movie Amina brought her hands up slapped them against Mark’s ear’s with all her might.

“You fucking bitch!” Mark screamed, clutching his ears.

She managed to push him away and wobbled to her feet. This time when she made it to the door, she was successful in getting outside. She blindly raced to the street, and didn’t notice the oncoming car until she found herself flying.

Her body hit the concrete with a crunch but there was no pain, only a euphoric sensation as she grandmother stood over her and held out her hand.

A smile briefly crossed her lips as she closed her eyes and walked into death’s embrace.