Chapter 16
Sixteen
Blaise
NOW
In the morning, I’m awakened again by Fenway barking in the yard and Jack telling her to hush before she wakes their guest.
The dog just keeps barking like he didn’t say anything.
I’m smiling when I haul myself out of bed and make a beeline for coffee. Since I told my story to Houston, I already feel so much better than I have in years. I honestly don’t care what happens next. Anything—and I do mean anything—is better than knowing about such a thing and not speaking up.
I pull on a zip-up sweatshirt and take my coffee out to watch the Jack and Fenway show.
“I’m sorry,” he says when I appear in the doorway. “She’s incorrigible.”
“Don’t worry about it. There are worse sounds to wake up to than puppy joy.”
“That’s a nice way of looking at it. I hope you don’t give me a crappy Yelp review.”
I laugh at the goofy face he makes to go along with the comment. “I’ve never written a Yelp review in my life, and I’m not going to start with you.”
“Oh, thank goodness.”
He’s so cute and funny, and I appreciate that he shared his painful past with me.
Losing both his parents in a matter of weeks had to have been a devastating blow.
That he turned lemons into lemonade by adding the cottages to help pay the expenses so he could keep his childhood home is also admirable.
But I have other questions.
“So what do you do with yourself other than walk around barefooted, play with your dog at the crack of dawn and manage your property?”
“Hello, nine o’clock is not the crack of dawn. It’s like noon for those of us who know how to make the most of a day.”
“I’m on vacation. Why do I feel judged?”
He laughs, and a little shiver of excitement travels down my spine.
When was the last time that happened? How about never?
I was a late bloomer in the boyfriend department, which is why what I witnessed at seventeen set me back even further.
I’ve dated here and there, had some sex I kind of enjoyed, but nothing special.
My newfound sense of freedom from the terrible burden has created space inside me to imagine things such as dating a guy like Jack, who’s fun, funny, handsome, sexy and he has a very cute dog. That’s definitely a plus. I’ve always loved dogs but never had an apartment that allowed pets.
Fenway comes rushing over to where I’m seated on the front step, drops her spitty ball at my feet and gives me a wet kiss before I have a second to prepare for any of it. “Damn, she’s quick.”
“The tongue is like lightning. It’s a weapon of mass destruction.”
I can’t believe the way I giggle like a young girl as the dog accosts me while her sexy owner says funny stuff about her.
“Fenway! That’s enough. Leave Blaise alone. She’s our guest.”
Fenway responds to his sterner tone of voice, plopping her rump down as she continues to pant and smile at me.
“She’s so cute.”
“And she knows it. That’s what makes her a holy terror.”
“You love her.”
“Desperately. She’s my best girl.”
“How’s a guy like you calling his Golden Retriever his best girl? And granted, she’s an exceptional Golden Retriever.”
“Are you asking why a sexy devil like me is single?”
I sputter with pretend outrage. “I never said that!”
“You didn’t have to. I know how it is.”
Rolling my eyes, I can’t help but laugh. “Whatever you say, stud.”
“I’ll have you know that I’ve had several girlfriends in my life that didn’t work out for one reason or another. Lately, I’ve decided single life is appealing, especially since Ms. Fenway came along and gave me someone other than myself to focus on.”
“I get that. Sometimes it’s just easier to stay uninvolved.”
“Sure is. You asked what I do. I’m an illustrator.”
“What does that entail?”
“I work with several children’s book publishers as well as ad agencies and others in need of original art.”
“Oh, wow. That sounds like the most fun job ever.”
“It’s pretty cool, and I get to work from home.” He gestures to the house. “The entire third floor is my studio.”
“Could I see it sometime?”
“Sure. Anytime you want.”
A crackle of something passes between us. I know he feels it as much as I do because he stares at me without blinking long enough that it would be awkward if it wasn’t for the crackle. “You want to come by later and check it out?”
“I’d love to. I have an appointment this afternoon, but I should be back before dinner.”
“Come find me. The door is always unlocked. Take the stairs to the top floor.”
“Are you sure I won’t be disturbing you?”
“Positive. Fenway and I like the company.”
“I’ll bring snacks.”
Hearing that word, Fenway launches from resting to full alert in one second flat.
As we laugh, Jack’s gaze collides with mine, and there’s that crackle again.
“You have to watch out for certain words around her.”
“Maybe you can give me the list.”
“We’d be happy to, but just so you know, I think she can spell, too, so that’s been a problem.”
“A dog who can spell. That’s a heck of a challenge.”
“You have no idea.”
I’m excited to have something to look forward to after reliving the horror of that long-ago night again with Houston. “Well, I’d better get myself together. See you guys later.”
“We can’t wait.”
“Neither can I.”
I’m nearly floating on air when I go inside to shower.
As I dry my hair, I relive every second in the yard this morning, right down to his perpetually bare feet.
Something about that strikes me as so endearing.
It shows how comfortable he is in his home, and I like that about him.
I like a lot of things about him, and for the first time in forever, that doesn’t scare me the way it would have only last week.
I’ve had such a strange relationship with men and dating and sex.
It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to tie that anxiety back to the trauma that changed my life forever.
The first time I had sex, I cried the whole time as I pictured such a thing being forced on Neisy against her will.
The poor guy didn’t know what to do with me.
He left, and I never saw him again. I remember being relieved to have gotten that first time out of the way, but when I thought about the encounter, it was mixed with images of horror.
Maybe later I’ll tell Jack why I’m in town. Houston wants me to fill him in, and something tells me I could trust him with my deepest, darkest secret.
Houston and I spend two grueling hours going through every aspect of my statement. He picks it apart for holes he says the AG will ask me about, but I have an answer for everything. Whether those answers will satisfy the prosecutor is anyone’s guess. We’ll find out tomorrow.
Feeling battered, I leave the police station and head to the grocery store to pick up a few things I need as well as the snacks I promised to bring to Jack’s.
I keep replaying the meeting with Houston and the emotions it resurrected.
It’s overwhelming to tell my story for the third time in as many days after keeping it bottled up for so long.
I leave the windows down to let in the scents of autumn.
That was my favorite time of year when I was a kid.
I loved the fall colors and have always had an interest in gardening, although I’ve not been able to do much of that since I live in the city.
My grandmother taught me the names of all the flowers, bushes and trees.
I love that I can identify any of them on sight.
It's nice to think about things other than why I’m here. With a week to ten days until we’ll hear from the grand jury, I could go back to New York. I should do that. Wendall is texting me nonstop, and I’ve heard from others at the theater that he’s been more unmanageable than usual since I left.
Call me crazy but going back to that doesn’t appeal to me at all.
I pull into a spot at the grocery store. Before I can lose my nerve, I text Wendall. The family situation is complicated. I’d like to work remotely for the next month. If you can’t allow that, I’ll understand. Let me know.
I’m coming out of the store carrying a brown bag when my phone chimes with a new text from Wendall.
Family is everything. I understand. You can work however you want. I need you to keep me sane, Blaise, the goddess of organization. Please don’t leave me.
I laugh out loud at his over-the-top-ness. That’s the nicest thing he’s ever said to me. I should’ve had a “family crisis” sooner so I could find some humanity in him. My friends at the theater will be shocked by his kindness, but they also know how much I do for him.
As I’m getting ready to pull out of my parking space, the phone chimes again. Assuming it’s Wendall with more drama, I glance at the screen.
Sienna. I never did take her out of my phone contacts, even though I should have a long time ago.
I heard you’re back in town. I just hope you’re not running your mouth about things that don’t matter anymore.
A chill goes down my spine. Is that a threat? How did she hear I’m home? I haven’t seen anyone but my mother, who’d never tell a soul because I asked her not to.
As I drive to Jack’s, I keep an eye on the rearview mirror to see if I’m being followed.
I’m the only car on the road, but I can’t escape the feeling that someone is watching me.
That people have heard I’m back in town.
That Sienna is the only other person on Earth who knows what we saw that night unless she eventually told Cam.
I doubt she did.
The anxiety her text arouses in me is tinged with sadness for a friendship that was destroyed on that momentous night.
At one time, she was the most important person in my life.
We told each other everything. And then that was gone, along with my innocence, my peace of mind, my sense of worth and so many other things suddenly lost because of one person’s actions.