Seven #2
When Blair put it like that, it seemed that keeping Ad Astra alive would be a Sisyphean task.
It was on the tip of Valerie’s tongue to say she was shutting down but she couldn’t.
She just couldn’t give up, no matter what her mother expected.
Ad Astra was hers and it was her dream. Maybe Ruth was right, and there was a third option.
“Take a break for the summer.”
God, that felt so much better to say than she was quitting.
Alexis lowered her drink and Valerie waited hopefully for some support in her moment of need. “Let me tell you about my idea,” she said. “I’ve had plenty of time to think, since I’m now unemployed, so it’s perfect.”
“Sorry,” muttered Valerie to her lap. Also, Alexis was technically employed until Friday.
“I talked to my husband and he agrees. I’ll be partners with you. I always thought I’d be an amazing business owner if I bothered. I’ve got so many ideas, you know?”
Unbelievable, but that was Alexis. Valerie supposed she should admire the nerve but that took more energy than she could summon.
“That’s an amazing idea, Alexis. You’ll do so good,” said Blair. The women on both sides nodded approval.
“Right now, I’m taking a break and I’ll see what happens.” Valerie was too emotionally fragile to get into a discussion about why it was ridiculous, and unable to bring herself to say a direct no as usual, especially with a Greek chorus singing Alexis’s praises.
“This way you don’t have to feel bad about firing me,” added Alexis. “I mean, I get why you did but I thought friends looked out for each other.”
Valerie should have known she got off too easy with that text yesterday.
“So true,” agreed Blair as she pulled her dark hair into a claw clip. “Since that’s settled, Valerie, are you going to take some time to hold space for yourself and heal?”
She’d forgotten Blair had started at a new yoga place that was dedicated to centering the self. “I’m going to the Mariposas for the summer.”
“Mariposa!” said Alexis. “How old school. I’m going to Prince Edward County for the holiday weekend. It’s way cooler.”
Blair pursed her lips. “Cute, I totally see you as the glamping type. The last time I was in the County was before it got popular. Tom and I are going for a workcation on a goat farm.”
The conversation moved to wine tours and baby goat yoga, and Valerie was glad she didn’t have to talk to Alexis about Ad Astra or her summer. She already felt possessive over Roger’s secret.
“By the way, I brought a book for you,” she said to Blair. She’d been looking forward to Blair’s excitement, as the story was completely up her alley.
“That’s so sweet.” Blair tossed it on the table without looking and Alexis rolled her eyes.
“Are you still going on about that thing? We get it, you liked it.”
Valerie decided to call it a night. Alexis leaned over as she gathered her bag. “It’s good you’re going away for a reset,” she said. “I’m so excited about this partnership!”
Now was the chance to deploy her no. She’d done it with Nico about the clothes yesterday, and he was a stranger. Surely she could say no to someone who was supposed to be a friend. She clenched the handle of her bag and looked at the faces nodding around the table.
“I’ll think about it,” she said feebly, hating herself.
“Don’t worry,” Alexis assured her. “I can get Ad Astra to its full potential. Everyone gets married, so specialized bachelorette parties are a real growth area, and way more fun. I don’t know what you were thinking with the funeral thing. It’s bizarre.”
She turned away, and no one said goodbye when Valerie left.
* * *
Nico waved to the night security guard as he left the office around eleven. He wasn’t sure how much time he would need helping Valerie with her big Mariposa fake-out and had spent the day delegating tasks to free up what he could.
There was only one project he was keeping entirely for himself, and that was the one he’d emerged from twenty minutes ago, dazed after finishing a gargantuan tranche of work.
He wanted to provide Roger with a new process to streamline the supply of flour to the factory and had spent the last few hours working through his interview notes and research.
He loved breaking down processes into the individual steps and figuring out how to improve each one.
It was heaven to make order out of chaos and remove the tiny friction points that increased time and aggravation.
He could never say this to Valerie. You didn’t have to be Casanova to know it was deeply unsexy to tell a woman that the pinnacle of your day involved flowcharting.
It’s not like he was going home to level up his man credits by restoring a 1979 Corvette or bench-pressing his own weight either.
He was going to review the damn document over a chilled glass of sauvignon blanc.
For a moment, he let himself imagine some indeterminate future, sitting on the couch with his wine and notes, Valerie’s head resting on his thigh as she read a book or talked about her day in one of those gentle moments between two people that confirmed everything they had.
He missed that part of being in a relationship but it was a fantasy, nothing more.
He barely knew Valerie; plus his thoughts of her were tinged, however unfairly, with that thin skin of hurt that Roger had trusted her first and had excluded him the way his sisters always had.
It made him feel inadequate, and he’d never experienced that with Roger or his job. He disliked it.
Back in his apartment, Nico put away his jacket, unpacked his bag, and straightened his shoes. As he waited for some bread to toast, he checked his email to find a message from Gia, a former colleague who had switched to recruiting a few years ago.
Hey, Nico, long time! I’m posting a new role over at Levia and thought you might have someone in your social network who might be a good fit.
Nico often received similar messages, but this time the description made him sweat. This was close to his dream job as an in-house workflow analyst. It was more junior than his current role, but he knew he’d have to put in some time rebuilding his career if he wanted to shift focus.
Could he tell Gia he was interested?
No. He couldn’t. This was a bad time for Roger and the Badgertons, and he had to stay put, at least for now.
What kind of person would he be if he left Roger in the middle of this turmoil?
He typed out a polite reply to Gia to say he’d pass it on, but for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to click Send.
Instead, he saved the message to his drafts.