Thirty-Two
Nico put down the ax to balance the log on the stump.
He was chopping wood to pass time productively, since his attention was shot to hell.
He’d looked for Roger after the fight with Valerie but had only found his phone on the table, and one of the canoes missing.
Roger was somewhere on the water, communing peacefully with nature, and while normally Nico encouraged that kind of healthy behavior, today it was extremely inconvenient.
He took aim with the ax and slammed it down with a resounding crack.
He couldn’t bring himself to text Valerie, although his phone had been flooded with messages that eventually slowed, then stopped.
She’d been in the wrong, that was undeniable, but he was ashamed at how unnecessarily cruel he’d been.
He took aim again. The impact reverberated through his arms but wasn’t enough to shake out the thoughts running through his head.
Valerie’s words had hurt because they were true. He had enmeshed too much of his life with Roger’s because Roger needed him. Or he thought Roger did. Maybe it had been the other way around and he’d been the needy one.
He stared down at the pockmarked stump. What was he to the family he’d spent so much of his time and effort easing life for, instead of focusing on himself?
He’d insisted to Kimmy that he was perfectly happy, but was he?
Was he loyal or was he scared? Was he willing to give up a good job with Roger for a dream he wasn’t sure would work?
Stability for change and uncertainty? To jump into life the way Valerie did?
Maybe.
He’d been at the Bread Company since he started work, and Roger’s executive assistant for much of that time. Perhaps it was time he tried something new.
He didn’t want to work as an assistant anymore.
He didn’t need to be so closely invested in the Badgertons.
He didn’t need to subsume his own life into Roger’s.
He prodded gently at this, as if testing the limits of an injury. He thought leaving Roger would be devastating but instead he felt almost free, like slipping off a weight.
Nico grabbed one of the log segments and put it upright, then brought down the ax.
The pieces fell to the grass and he thought about the future he wanted.
He pictured it like a flowchart. There was the oval start coming down to the diamond representing his first decision.
Did he want to stay with Roger in a life that was increasingly stagnant?
To the right, no. Below, yes.
Nico retrieved the email from Gia from his trash folder and thought about Valerie telling him to just see.
He could just see where this went. He typed out a short reply to tell Gia he’d been looking at a career shift.
Could they meet when she got back from her cruise to talk about roles like the one she’d been hiring for? He read it over. Then again.
He sent it.
It felt like the end of an era when he lifted his finger from the screen, but perhaps he would never be ready. Perhaps life simply came at you on its own terms regardless of whether you were prepared. You either ducked or grabbed for it with everything you had.
Like Valerie. He hadn’t been looking for her, but here she was.
He visualized the next decision diamond. Did he want a future with Valerie? There wasn’t a moment of hesitation. Every arrow pointed to yes.
He wasn’t going to duck. He was going to find Valerie and he was going to apologize and hear her out. Nico was going to have to talk about his feelings, which he didn’t love, but he wanted to get it out in the open so they could move on and not let it build the way he had with Stefanie.
However, locating Valerie, like finding Roger, was an issue.
She wasn’t by the lake or in her bunkie or on any of the paths.
Finally, he went into the house, where people were helping themselves to the seasonal yogurt parfaits and brioche breakfast sandwiches laid out by the assiduous yet unseen staff.
Nico checked the Mariposa room but it was empty. “Has anyone seen Valerie?”
Alice looked up from the new washcloth she was crocheting. She must have a dozen of them now. “I thought she went out. Oh, here she is.”
Valerie arrived, and it killed him to see how forlorn she looked. Before he could ask if they could talk, Roger came in from the other entrance. “The lake is like glass,” he said happily, grabbing the oatmeal pack left for him.
Nico thought this moment would be one of triumph but instead he felt sick with nerves at telling Roger what they’d found—and sicker with the desperation of wanting to talk to Valerie.
Valerie shifted from foot to foot, and when he glanced over, he saw the smile on her face was more like a grimace.
She was nervous too. At least they were united in that.
The door opened to reveal Penny. Her arms were filled with flowers wrapped with string and a tote bag that had a baguette poking out like a Parisienne coming back from her daily shopping.
She zeroed in on Valerie with a small smile Nico wasn’t sure he liked.
It wasn’t friendly, or kind, but the sort of smile worn by someone sitting in a futuristic egg chair petting a white Persian cat.
“Hey, Pen,” said Roger. “Have fun at the farmers’ market?”
Penny tossed the bags on the island without looking. “I’m glad you’re all here.”
“Did you get apple cookies?” asked David, grabbing the tote. “You know those are my favorite.”
“Oh, apple cookies.” Fernie joined him in looking through the bag.
Penny ignored them. “I ran into Jim Walker.”
There was a slim possibility this conversation might not be as bad as Nico and Murphy’s Law assumed it would. He tried not to make eye contact with Valerie, for fear it would be noted as suspicious.
“Walker.” David frowned. “The investments guy from the next lake over?”
“Yes, but that’s not important,” Penny said impatiently.
“Then maybe you should get to the point,” suggested Alice.
Penny waved her down. “Valerie, he told me he knows your father. Your real father.”
Valerie didn’t move. “Oh?”
Nico applauded her attempt to bluff this out as much as possible but the fatalistic look she cast him said what they both knew. This was it. Roger had cut off his conversation with Brayden and was now paying attention to what was going on.
“Jim said you weren’t adopted at all. He was shocked you were passing yourself off as Roger’s daughter.” Penny tilted her head. “I suggested Jim call your father right away and informed him we would call the police.”
“Penny, can we talk in private?” asked Roger urgently.
Penny approached Valerie with a deliberate walk that was almost a prowl.
“I knew you were lying. Something was off about you from the beginning. I don’t know how you fixed that DNA test but I’ve been watching you.
You’re no Badgerton. But I knew not even Jim’s story would be enough given the claws you had in Roger.
Luckily, on the way home I got a call from my investigator. ”
“The one I told you to stop using?” asked Roger, incensed.
“It’s a good thing I didn’t. Jared managed to get a very interesting document.” She pulled out her phone. “The birth certificate of Valerie Xingyi Peng.” She gave Valerie a triumphant look. “I knew you were lying about your birthday.”
David grabbed it from her. “Parents. Anna Liaoming Peng and Scott Innis?” He frowned. “You’ve got your mother’s last name? Weird.”
Valerie didn’t answer and the room was quiet as David passed the phone to Roger.
“Did you lie about who you were for the money?” Penny said.
“It must be. That’s why you wouldn’t sign my papers.
” She paused as if a thought occurred to her.
“Or some sick revenge? Did you blame us for your business’s collapse?
It was going to fail soon enough anyway.
Ridiculous idea, to plan funerals like that. ”
“For the last time, I don’t plan funerals,” Valerie said loudly, then looked shocked at herself.
“Penny!” Roger made a slashing motion with his arm. “That’s enough.”
“Enough?” Penny was dumbfounded. “Did you hear a word I said? She’s playing you, Roger.
I have her birth certificate, actual proof she’s not your daughter.
She knew you were desperate to find your child and used that.
Thank God she didn’t sleep in the house.
I knew she wasn’t one of us. I knew it. I bet that woman Yvette was involved as well. We can’t trust anyone.”
Nico wished he’d managed to get to Roger two minutes earlier. He wished Roger had checked his phone, for God’s sake, because how could he tell Roger about Yvette and Rory in the middle of this? He couldn’t. Roger deserved to learn that news in a moment of peace and not this commotion.
“Valerie is here because I asked her,” shouted Roger. “I asked her to pretend to be my kid, and the reason I had to do it is because one of you is lying about Yvette and my daughter. I know you are, so don’t deny it.”
“You asked her?” Penny asked in disbelief. “This was your idea?”
“All mine.”
“You did what?” bellowed David, a moment behind in the conversation. “How dare you!”
“Christ, do you think I wanted to?” Roger glared at him.
“I had no choice. The investigator wasn’t getting anywhere and my kid is out there thinking I don’t want her.
Do you know how that feels? Do you?” His voice was thick with pain.
“You got to see Fernie’s first steps. You got to watch her grow and be there when she needed her dad.
You taught her to ride a bike and make pancakes, and to swim in that lake right fucking there, the way Mom taught us.
I got none of that and I didn’t even know it was something I should be missing. I failed her and I didn’t even know.”
David looked away as Penny put her hands on her hips. “You have some nerve, hiring someone to spy on us when you were all high and mighty about telling me what I should do. We’re Badgertons, Roger. We don’t act like this.”