52. Chapter 52
CHAPTER 52
Rawn
T he carriage cell lurched to a stop; startling Rawn awake. His heart jumped next at the sound of rushing of water. Sitting up, he exchanged a look with Elon then both looked out at the glistening lake of Naiads Mere. It was a vast body of water, so large Rawn would think they were at the seashore.
The scent of algae carried on the wind, and his pulse quickened. They were thirty feet away from freedom. Rawn discreetly flexed his stiff limbs and Elon did the same. The guards allowed them out of their cell once a day to relieve themselves.
This would be their only chance.
Rawn and Elon stayed still, feigning disinterest as one of the guards unlocked the carriage cell door. As soon as he heard the bolt click, Rawn lurched up and threw his body at the door. It knocked back the guard and he bolted outside.
“Follow me!” Elon hissed, sprinting alongside him. Rawn followed close behind as shouts rang out behind them.
His heart sped wildly at the sound of horses and Bloodhounds beasts giving chase. He kept his gaze on the water. All he had to do was jump in.
He was twenty feet away.
Fifteen.
Ten.
Please.
A blast of magic hit them. The air was torn from his lungs as he crashed into the ground headfirst. His vision skewed and sound dulled. But none of it compared to the devastation he felt. A shadow approached and Rawn looked up as Anon rammed a boot into his face.
Twenty-Five Years Ago
Within the castle’s garden, Rawn pathetically attempted to drown himself in a bottle of wine. But he had chosen the worst place to do so, when he was surrounded by Aerina’s scent. The dynalya blossoms seemed to mock him as he heard the wedding bells toll.
A shadow fell over him and he looked up at Sylar’s father.
“Master Eldred,” Rawn slurred. He held up the wine bottle to him in a toast. “To love and prosperity and wishes unattained.”
The old magi master sighed, and his sad eyes only saddened more. He sat beside Rawn and took a drink from the bottle. “Look at what grief has done to us.”
Rawn’s throat tightened. “I miss him.”
“I know. I do too.” Eldred rested his staff on his lap. It was now woven with the wood that had once belonged to Sylar’s staff. “I am afraid to ask why you are here, young master.”
Rawn looked up at the many glowing windows of the castle. “I wanted to her…”
The old Magi Master shook his head. “You can’t, Rawn. Not today. You have fallen into your drink and are in no position to speak to anyone. Where have you been?”
Rawn had taken a leave of absence from his duties and spent most of his time at the bottom of a barrel, drowning in wild berry wine, searching for something to fill the hole in his chest. But he could not put Aerina out of his mind or the last thing he said to her. In some drunken stupor, he had stumbled his way here to tell her the truth.
“I need to tell her before it’s too late, Eldred. I need to tell her—” Rawn’s voice cracked, and he dropped in his hands. “That I lied. That she was my wish.”
Eldred’s eyes widened and he glanced fleetingly at the castle with alarm. “She is to marry Varden Karheim today,” he hissed under his breath.
“I know,” he choked.
“She is a princess, young master. This cannot be. The king would have your head.”
Rawn shut his eyes. “How cruel the fates be for she is so far out of my reach and beyond the dreams I am worthy to covet. I kept my distance and settled to only watch over her from afar. I tried to harden my resolve, yet I am weak, and I despise myself for it…” He pressed on his chest that seemed to weight beneath an invisible weight. It was crushing him. Maybe it was the wine, or maybe it was knowing he had a chance to confess and relinquished it for the sake of duty. “My love for her betrays my king and country. I know this, nonetheless I cannot seem to let it go. My yearning for her is too great, beyond what I can bear. If I am to die for it, then so be it. But I cannot … I cannot go another day without telling her as I should have the night we danced. That she had been my wish...”
“And you are mine.”
Rawn blinked and looked back through his tears to Aerina standing in front of them. She was in a white gown, a crown of silver in her hair, a stunning beauty in the backdrop of the setting sun.
Rawn’s breath caught. “Aerina…”
Her pretty eyes shone wet, her lips trembling. And he knew she heard his confession. Every word.
“I … forgive me...” He looked away. “I…”
Leaning down, she cupped his cheek and made him look at her, fingers cool and gentle against his skin. “Do you think of me?”
Rawn swallowed, though it did nothing to dislodge the lump in his throat. “With every passing thought and breath,” he whispered.
“Do you long for me?”
His voice caught. “With every beat of my heart.”
“Then what more could you want, but to be in my arms, dreaming of more days where you are my own?” Aerina held out her hand to him and his own shook as Rawn took it. He couldn’t stop the ridiculous tears that keep falling. She pulled him up to his feet and started leading him away. “Master Eldred, please tell my brother I will no longer marry Lord Karheim.”
Rawn gaped at her. “What?”
“Wha-what do you mean?” Eldred stuttered, equally aghast. He quickly got to his feet. “What am I to tell him, Princess? The entire kingdom is here to see you wed!”
“Tell him, I have chosen another.” Her eyes danced with laughter as she pulled Rawn into a run, and they dashed toward Fair.
He helped her up and quickly mounted behind her. Eldred and the Karheim guards rushed to them, shouting at them to stop.
“Ralov, Osomreh,” Aerina told Fair, encouraging him to flee. “Ralov!”
Wrapping an arm around her waist, Rawn snapped the reins, and they galloped away. They were chased but somehow made it past the drawbridge before they could be stopped. This was the most foolish thing he had ever done. Rawn wasn’t sure where he was even taking her.
He would most likely be thrown in the dungeons for this.
The only thing he cared about now was her. When they reached the road outside of Avandia, Rawn brought Fair to a stop. They paused there, looking back at the castle.
“Princess, it is not too late to go back.”
“Yes it is…” Aerina whispered.
“It is wrong to steal you away. The king would never let this go …” He shut his eyes as he was suddenly very sober. “I have tarnished your name.”
Even if Rawn had not touched her, he took her away unescorted. Most, if not all, would assume what they had done.
“I care not what they say,” Aerina said faintly. She turned her head to look at him. “Have me no so no other will. Keep me so I will no longer suffer your absence. Take me away, so no other will attempt it again, for I now belong to the Red Shade.” She moved closer, her lips faintly brushing his. “The Vale will surmise its own story, but I know the truth. I am foolishly in love with you too, Rawn Norrlen.”
Rawn breathed her in, shutting his eyes. “I must have fallen of my horse and fallen in a ditch half dead imagining you say such things.”
Aerina laughed and kissed his cheek. “Does that feel imaginary?” He stilled as she kissed his mouth. “How about this one?”
Rawn held her to him and deepened the kiss. She wrapped her arms around him and sighed against his lips.
“Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife,” he asked between kisses.
“I will.”
They rode away together, but when Aerina fell asleep in his arms, Rawn looked down at her serene face, and knew stealing her away was no better than what Red Highland had done.
It was enough to know she loved him as much as he loved her. Even if it cost his life, Rawn took the princess back the next morning. She woke as soon as they arrived at the castle, weeping as the guards dragged him to the dungeons.
Rawn waited for death during the week he was left in his cell. His only company was the strip of sunlight from the high window in the cold, weathered stones of his walls.
“You swore your allegiance to me,” a voice surfaced from the shadows.
Weak from a diet of only bread and water, Rawn’s head lolled to where King Leif stood by the dungeon doors.
He worked his dry throat to speak. “If you did not have it, I would not have returned her to you, sire.”
“I should take your life.”
Rawn closed his eyes. “If that is what I deserve, then so be it.”
“I would if your blood would remove the stain on her name. Rumors have already begun to spread that you have bedded her.”
A knot tightened in Rawn’s throat, offended and angered to not only have his integrity tarnished but also hers. “I swear before the God of Urn, I have not.”
“It matters not, most already believe it. No one will have her now.”
Brow furrowing, Rawn looked up at him. “Should my blood be of no use to you, I fail to understand why I yet breathe.”
King Leif was quiet a moment as they studied each other. “Aerina has told me the truth.” Rawn’s heart sank into the pit of his stomach. “She is now cursed and unable to bear children. The future of our kingdom is lost.” Leif rubbed his face, suddenly looking so tired, shocking Rawn when he sat on the dirty floor on the other side of the bars. “I suppose this is the end of our line.” He shook his head at the cobwebs on the ceiling. “Could you still love her, knowing she would never give you a son?”
“There is no question, sire,” Rawn said. “I accept her as she is in any form, in any status, in any life. If she would have me.”
Leif scoffed faintly. “I thought as much. Likewise, Aerina refuses to eat in protest if I do not terminate her engagement to Lord Karheim. I fear she will leap from her tower should I sentence you to death. It is the duty of royalty to marry for wealth and power. By which you have none.” He groaned and rubbed his face, but Rawn sensed Leif wasn’t truly here to kill him.
He held his breath, not daring to move or even blink.
“My reign now hangs in the balance now more than ever. It cannot be said that my own men betray me.” Leif mouth pursed in a thin line. “Your father, the most reserved elf I know, has offered his life in your stead.”
The news left Rawn speechless. His father was never affectionate. He was a hard and cold elf, driven by honor and duty. He would lay down his life for the king, but Rawn never expected he would lay it down for him.
“Are you my enemy, Rawn Norrlen?”
“If you truly believed me to be your enemy, sire, I would not be alive to speak to you now.” Shifting to his knees, Rawn bowed his head. “Whatever your verdict, my life is yours.”
Leif’s dark green eyes held his, the intensity behind them piercing a hole through his chest. “Yes, it is.”
Thereafter, the King granted him a dukedom over the land of Sellav.
The previous lord had passed without an heir, thus it was given to Rawn as a reward for his deeds in preventing the capture of Greenwood’s princess. At least that was the tale fed to the court. With such a title, he now had the status to marry Aerina.
It was not a reward well earned.
Rawn knew it and the people knew it. His family all but shunned him, and society scorned them. Making them the subject of gossip and malcontent. Even when he felt regretful for ruining her reputation, Aerina held up her chin through all of it.
Their wedding ceremony was small and private.
No fanfare. No guests.
Regardless, as Rawn spoke his vows, he could forget everything else, for he could at last be with the one he loved. It was perhaps the best night of his life. So perfect, it felt like a dream.
But the morning after, when he woke to the golden light of dawn streaming in through their window, he saw his bride tearfully gazing at herself in the mirror with a hand over her flat stomach.
Rawn thought he could live with never having any children, but he saw the sadness in Aerina’s eyes whenever a baby was in her sights. That was not for them. Yet it was another secret wish neither of them dared to say aloud.
The best thing he could do was give her his heart and comfort hers, except he could hardly give her that either. Now as Greenwood’s Red Shade, Rawn was forever tied to King’s Leif’s control. He was called away nearly every day on missions for the crown.
Payment for his bride.
Four years passed as he fought battles for the crown.
The more Aerina was left alone, the more her desolation grew. Rawn could see it in the effort of her smiles that no longer glowed, and in her eyes that always seemed on the verge of tears. This was not what she had envisioned for them.
On a whim, Rawn took her for a short holiday away from the castle as an excuse to visit their appointed lands of Sellav. They traveled alone together off the main roads, and after a day, the change in scenery seemed to lift her spirits.
On the third evening, they arrived in a beautiful wood south of River Myst. The rush of water greeted them as he rode Fair onward until they reached a pool crowned by three cascades. Dynalya flowers glittered in the moonlight, petals floating on the surface. Their sweet scent filled the air.
Aerina’s face lit up with a true smile he hadn’t seen in months. “Oh, Rawn, it’s beautiful. Where are we?”
Dismounting from his horse, Rawn took hold of her waist and brought her down. “The Melodyam Falls.”
They paused there by the shore, watching the water glisten beneath the moonlight.
“This place was all Sylar spoke about,” Aerina said with a sad smile. “It was the subject of his healer studies, he was convinced…” she trailed off and softly gasped, looked up at Rawn with wide eyes.
“He was convinced the water infused with the dynalya flower, may hold great healing capabilities.” Rawn began to unbutton his tunic. “Beyond our understanding…”
Her eyes went wider when she saw his shoulder. Her fingers lightly traced the spot of where the spear had pierced him. The same spot Sylar had treated. The scar was gone.
“This is…”
“Impossible?” Rawn smiled.
Her eyes welled. “Are you saying…?”
Sighing, he pulled her to him and pressed his forehead against hers. “Aerina, I cannot promise to undo your curse, but I can promise I will love you and give you your heart’s desire. Regardless, if we should adopt a son who does bear our blood.” He lightly kissed away the tears on her cheek, then traced her trembling mouth with his own. Rawn’s pulse danced, so highly aware of Aerina’s warmth pressed against his chest. “You deserve the world,” he murmured against her ear. “For you are the entirety of mine.”
Lifting Aerina in his arms, Rawn carried her to the pool where he made love her under the moon. Perhaps it was magic. Perhaps it was love. But after a month in Sellav, Aerina announced she was with child.
It was a miracle.
An impossibility.
But their joy quickly faded into distress. Neither of them had truly expected the healing waters to work, and now that it had, Rawn realized the birth of their child threatened the future of the throne.
The first matter was to extend their holiday by hiding away in their estate for fear of what Leif would do. After a month of avoiding the King’s summons, Rawn had no choice but to bring a bottle of the healing waters to Leif and confess.
He was right of course.
Lief was furious they kept this from him.
It was only the fact that they had found the answer to undo his own curse that pardoned Rawn. By Leif’s command, they were to remain in Sellav and to keep Aerina’s pregnancy a secret. Their child would not be acknowledged until the Queen herself had given birth first.
Rawn couldn’t have hoped for anything better.
They found peace in their corner of Greenwood. Aerina was a glowing light of happiness as her belly grew.
“What shall be our child’s name?” she asked one night in bed. “It must be a great name.”
“Not only great, but one of meaning,” Rawn said beside her. “So they will know what they mean to us.”
He laid a hand on her perfectly round stomach and laughed at the little kicks against his palm.
She smiled. “Do you have one in mind?”
“I will ponder on it.”
The sun was low on the horizon of red blooms when Rawn’s son came into the world. Pink and screaming, with a tuff of blond hair and his mother’s eyes. He was a fussy little thing, but Rawn had never seen anything more perfect.
“I’ll take him now,” Rawn said softly when Aerina finished feeding him. “Rest.”
“Oh, darling, the nursemaid can take him to the nursery,” she said sleepily.
“Absolutely not. I’m here. He has no need of a nursery. This little one is staying with me.” Rawn kissed her forehead and tucked her in before slipping outside onto the terrace. “Best we let your mother sleep, yes?” he murmured as he swayed their newborn in his arms. Rawn could only gaze at him in wonder, at his little miracle.
It seemed at last their wish had come true.
But Rawn had only held his son for one day before the King’s messenger came riding up the road with a cryptic letter.
The desert searches for an eye, and the forest lacks a fang.
Return to the castle at once.
The message could only mean Red Highland had brewed a new scheme. Rawn had been a soldier most of his life, but at that moment he abhorred it. His wife had just given birth. He wanted to be home with his family, not on another mission for the crown.
It wasn’t as if he had a choice. It was a royal command. Perhaps it was more punishment, for King Leif had not yet forgiven him. Or perhaps retaliation, because the Queen had not yet fallen with child.
Aerina wept as she held their baby close. “It’s not fair…” she told him. “I gained a son, but he may lose his father. If anything happened to you, I could not bear it.”
Rawn curled behind her on the bed, holding his family tight. “I have thought of a name,” he said.
“Tell me.”
He did.
Tears rolled down her cheeks. “It’s perfect.”
The day he had married the love of his life, Rawn had sworn to do whatever necessary to repay the gift he had been given. So at dawn the next day, he sent word that he accepted the mission.
If only he knew he would never keep what he had wished for.