Risking it All

Chapter 1

Zenia (Zen-ee-ya) Morgan

“No,” I blurted before I could stop myself.

The bride-to-be blinked slowly in the mirror, frowning before she responded to my outburst. “Excuse me?”

I shook my head, bringing myself back to the moment. The last thing I wanted to do was ruin her big day.

“I mean, no, this isn’t quite right. I think the sleeves could be taken up a little bit. It’ll make you look leaner.”

Kimberly was actually stunning in the lacy snow-white gown. The sheer sleeves were decorated with lacy flowers giving her the dainty but elegant look she was going for. The dress was almost perfect.

“I was actually thinking that too. They should hit a little lower.”

“We’ll get that ready for you in a day or two.”

“I can’t believe this is really happening,” she said, patting her tear ducts with her fingertips as tears gathered in her eyes.

“Oh, my goodness, my baby is finally getting married,” her mom said, walking up to stand beside us.

“Don’t say finally like I’m an old maid, Mama.”

“I didn’t mean it like that. You know what I mean, don’t you, Zenia?”

“Yes, ma’am.” I quickly nodded.

The last thing I needed was another despondent bride. My heart was heavy enough just thinking about my pending nuptials. I didn’t need that rubbing off on my clients. It was my job to make sure the bride felt beautiful on her wedding day. There was no room for sad tears.

“Thank you so much, Zenia. You are absolutely amazing,” Kimberly said, turning to face me.

“Thank you. You’re going to be a beautiful bride,” I said, forcing a smile.

There was no reason for me not to smile, other than my heavy heart.

Kimberly was and would be beautiful on her wedding day.

Once Kimberly and her family were gone, I was finally able to have a much-needed moment of quiet.

I stood there for a while staring at the empty pedestal where she had been standing.

Every bride stood on that pedestal anxiously awaiting their wedding day.

Each one of them was ready to live out a dream come true.

For me, it only represented a nightmare.

“Zenny!”

“Yeah?” I turned around to find Emerson standing behind me with her hands on her hips.

“What’s wrong?” she quizzed, walking deeper into the room with a frown etched on her face.

“Nothing, I was just thinking.”

“I’ve been calling your name for a whole minute. You had me scared for a second,” she said with a nervous smile.

“I’m fine. I swear,” I assured her, tearing my eyes away from my reflection in the mirror and letting them drift over to my boss.

“You sure you good, girl?” she pressed, walking over to stand in front of me.

“I am, but can I try my dress on before we go?”

“Sure.” She agreed, but she stood there studying my face for a full beat before blinking away whatever unreadable expression covered her face. It only lasted for a fraction of a second, but I caught it.

“Thank you. I’ll be out in a second,” I said when she finally turned and left the dressing room.

I could still picture my own dress fitting, which had been two months ago. Now I was rapidly approaching my wedding day, and I had yet to try the dress on again to check the alterations.

When I was in my wedding dress, I almost felt like a real bride. For a moment, I forgot that I was being forced to marry the backup husband my dad allowed to buy me after my originally assigned groom decided that he no longer wanted to marry me.

In spite of the shitty hand that I’d been dealt, I really did love the dress.

It cost half the value of the luxury car I drove to work every day.

The only thing that made me feel good about what I had to do to restore my family’s good standing was spending as much of my father’s money as I wanted to in order to make my dream wedding a reality.

It didn’t matter that I didn’t know or love the man I was being forced to dedicate the rest of my living days to. It was my new destiny.

I was told to spare no expense when it came to my wedding. Out of anger, I’d been selecting the most expensive version of everything, even though I knew I could never break my father. If I was being forced into a marriage, I at least wanted to look good as hell for my big day.

I’d chosen to have my dress custom made by my boss at The Diamond Needle, because Emerson Cruz was the best of the best. She had proven herself a hundred times over. I looked like an absolute princess in my dress.

Tears welled up in my eyes as I reminisced on the dream of happily ever after that had been long abandoned.

I swept my butt-length blowout up into the hair tie that was around my wrist as I gave myself one last assessment.

Aside from my hair and complexion, I was nothing like the beautiful twenty-one-year-old girl with my whole life ahead of me.

Seven years ago, before my hopes and dreams were squashed, I woke up bright and early every morning, worked out and ate a healthy meal, and read a book in preparation for a long life with the handsome man I’d been trained to love and serve forever.

From the day I turned ten years old, I’d known my fate. As a member of The Force, my dad had the obligation to submit heirs to be wed into another family of the organization. When I turned twelve, I was matched with another family’s fifteen-year-old son.

The Fuller family was well known and well respected.

I was told that it was an honor that our families were matched.

I’d met and befriended their son knowing that, eventually, we would get married.

He felt like I was a little girl and kept me out of a lot of his personal business, but he was cool because he was so easy to talk to.

My parents never talked about anything. I at least wanted to be able to talk to my husband about my problems and concerns.

I felt like if I had to marry someone, who better than a person I considered a friend?

I never really questioned why my family got to pick out my husband because as far as I knew, that was just the way things went.

Our wedding was supposed to take place right after Reed graduated from college. Imagine my surprise when he called off the wedding and went on to complete his abduction missions and leave the family business altogether.

The man literally killed people so he wouldn’t have to marry me.

One of those men happened to be one of my cousins who’d been stealing from The Force.

My dad was glad that the blood didn’t wind up on his hands directly.

On the other hand, he was pissed that the wedding he’d been planning on using to leverage his power in The Force for years was never going to happen.

Reed’s dismissal came with heavy disdain from my family. My father, in particular, felt like I had been tainted by the rejection. He blamed me for Reed’s falling in love with another woman, saying I must have done something to turn him away.

For years, I went over every encounter and conversation we’d had, looking for my mistakes.

Had I been too eager to please him and make things work?

Had I not shown enough interest in the things he liked?

Was I too skinny? Too fat? At the end of all the stress and mental turmoil, the only thing I came up with was an antidepressant prescription and an extra fifty pounds tacked onto my frame.

Not a day went by when I wasn’t reminded of the wedding that didn’t happen. Especially since my sister’s commitments had also been called into question along with my family’s standing in The Force.

Once word of the cancellation spread throughout the organization, my family was put on probation.

I had to go through the humiliation of being checked out by a doctor to make sure that I hadn’t been tainted before the ceremony.

The procedure would have taken place anyway, to confirm my virginity, but having to do it without the promise of a wedding and a whirlwind romance at the end hit a lot differently.

I was violated for no reason, and my sisters were still not allowed to wed, not that they cared.

Back then, I was the only one looking forward to getting married.

Ironically, after everything was said and done, I no longer wanted to get married.

It didn’t matter what I wanted. In thirty days, I was set to marry Roderick St. Thomas.

Roderick was the second oldest son of Rodriquez St. Thomas. They were one of the four families that ran The Force. My family, the Morgans, were one of the others along with the Fullers and the Jenkins families.

As one of the family patriarchs of The Force, my dad’s number one goal in life was to have two sons to train to follow in his footsteps in the business.

That lofty ambition left him with four daughters before my mom finally had enough sense to say enough.

Having no male heir to offer meant that he had to give up two of his daughters.

Although we weren’t all obligated to carry that burden, my mom trained all of us to be quietly observant in the company, obedient, and always useful to the men in our lives.

My dad drilled the importance of maintaining our virtue until we were married into our heads.

Seven years after my wedding was canceled, I was still a virgin, waiting for my husband to appear.

“Fuck this,” I mumbled to myself, tearing my eyes away from my reflection.

Unlike me, my sister Zara had figured out a loophole and went to college to buy herself some time before she was required to get married.

I had accepted my fate, but Zara wasn’t with it.

She seemed to be the only sane one in the bunch.

She always preached about how the whole rhetoric of an arranged marriage was outdated and complete bullshit.

It had been weeks since any of us had heard from her, even me.

I was the only who she’d confided in when she decided to run. I was the only one she trusted. Zora and Zuri were such daddy’s girls that they would have ratted her out before she had the chance to get away.