Chapter 13
Zenia
The tone of Sawyer’s voice stirred me from my sleep. Something was wrong. I was on my feet as soon as I heard him say my father’s name. First, he’d tracked me to the casino. Now he knew who was helping me.
I should have known that his reach would find me sooner or later.
I actually did know that, but I trusted that Sawyer could protect me.
It was stupid to let him convince me that he could protect me.
It was even more foolish to let him put himself in danger to protect me.
He didn’t know what he was getting himself into.
Now that he knew who I was, my savior might not have been such a savior anymore. I swallowed hard when he turned to face me. His silence terrified me. I had no idea what they’d told him or what he was about to do about it.
“Sawyer,” I whispered, taking a step back. I needed to figure out how to get past his big ass without him catching me.
“Zenia, relax, mama.”
“Sawyer, wait,” I said, trying to buy time as I worked out an exit plan.
His eyebrows snapped together, and he tilted his head to the side as he moved around the bed.
“Wait!” I held up my hands.
“Z, what do you think I’m about to do, mama?” he quizzed.
“I have no idea, but hearing you say my real name isn’t very reassuring. Please stop moving.”
Upon my request, he stopped walking.
“You were Reed’s fiancée?” he asked. His chest rose but didn’t deflate, like he might have been holding his breath as he waited for my response.
“Yes,” I replied barely over a whisper.
His disappointment was palpable as his chin dropped to his chest.
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t tell you. I didn’t know who I could trust to know who I really was. I definitely couldn’t have Reed knowing.”
“He’s my best friend, Zenia. What the fuck?”
“I couldn’t tell you who I was for obvious reasons.
Reed and I weren’t in love. Our marriage was arranged, but I’m pretty sure you know that.
When he threw me away like trash, everyone, including my own father, treated me like I was a pariah.
I was telling the truth about my father using us for sex trafficking.
There’s no telling how much money he made off his pure virgin daughter.
He literally fucking sold me to the highest bidder and expected me to just marry him after my sister ran away and made the last deal fall through.
“I had just met the man I was supposed to marry right before I ran. He’s horrible.
He bragged about killing his cousin for not being a virgin when they had her checked.
I knew it was only a matter of time before he did the same to me.
He would get away with it too. There were a ton of missing girls that would never be seen again because of the men of The Force.
I decided before I let them kill me, I would do it myself. ”
“That’s why you took those pills,” he mumbled.
“I . . . I wanted Reed to see what he did to me. Since I was a child, I was raised and trained to be his perfect wife. My entire existence was being a good wife to him one day. Then he fell in love, real love. Something I thought I would never experience. One day he just woke up and decided that I wasn’t good enough. ”
“Mama,” he groaned, carefully taking a step closer to me.
I moved backward, making him stop.
“I didn’t have a choice, Sawyer. I’ve never had a fucking choice until you. Until you saved me. I felt like I didn’t have anything to look forward to. You changed that for me.”
“That’s why you should know I would never hurt you, baby. I need you to know that. I can’t stand for you to look at me like that. What did I tell you, mama?”
“That if somebody wanted to hurt me, they would have to go through you. That was before you knew how valuable serving my head up on a platter would be. That was before you had any idea how dangerous protecting me would be. You said that before you knew who I was. I know I can’t hold you to that now. ”
“None of that shit matters, Zenia. I’m a man of my word. I could have made one phone call and found out exactly who you were. Protecting you was more important than any of that shit. I care about you, Zenia. Let me help you.”
“Don’t you see there’s no helping me at this point? Once we had sex, I signed my death certificate. I signed it the moment I decided to run.”
“So what exactly happened after Reed pulled out on the marriage? When I met him, he was already working on the move to get out of it.”
“My father blamed me for him not wanting me. Suddenly, his beautiful sunflower was no longer desirable enough to make a man want her. There must have been something wrong with me. For years, I shut down and just waited.”
“What were you waiting for?”
I scoffed. “Waiting for someone else to decide my future, for someone’s no-good son to choose me. To my family, I was just a reminder of a business deal gone bad. The more I waited, the worse my depression got. Eventually, I stopped caring.”
“Just because your parents told you that was the way love and life works doesn’t make it right. Our parents can be our worst enemies sometimes.”
“I know now. I guess I always knew that the way they did things was wrong. I just had to accept it. Accepting that made me decide to go. I knew if I stayed and married Roderick, I wouldn’t survive.
I came here because I wanted Reed to pay for ruining my life.
If he hadn’t broken our engagement, I would have already been married. ”
“You think you would actually be happy? It was still an arranged marriage.”
“I don’t know, but I was way past that. When I found out he would be gone for months, I knew it was too late.
I met you, and for one night, I got to pretend that I was just another woman sitting at a bar, trying to meet a guy.
You didn’t know who I was, and you didn’t have any expectations.
It was perfect for what I had planned. I never expected to know you beyond that first night.
I definitely never meant to fall for you. ”
“I’ve spent weeks trying to figure out why someone would want to hurt you.
When you mentioned sex trafficking, I just figured you were connected to some sick people.
I never imagined it had anything to do with The Force.
I wish you would have trusted me to be able to help you.
I needed to be way out in front of this. I’m at a loss right now.”
“See, I was trying to protect you from knowing too much.”
“I was already in too deep after the first night, mama.”
“I know, Sawyer. I’m sorry. I don’t even know what to tell you.”
He sighed. “Just,” he said, shaking his head before turning.
“Sawyer, please don’t walk away from me right now.”
“I’m not walking away from you, mama. I just need to think. I have to figure out how to move. Just give me some time, OK.”
“I’ll leave if I need to.”
He switched directions, walking over to me. “Listen to me, Zenia. Don’t leave this house for any reason. Promise me that you’ll stay here until I figure out how to help you.”
“Me getting away from you might be the best way for me to help you.”
“Zenia, do not leave this fuckin’ house!” he roared, making me jump.
My eyes ballooned. The tone of his voice made me comply. “OK,” I rushed.
“I’m not trying to scare you, baby. I’m trying to let you know that I understand how serious this is, and I know you do too.”
“What are you gonna do?”
“I have no idea right now. First, I need to talk to Reed.”
I shook my head. “No. You cannot bring him into this. He’s just going to turn me in.”
“You think I would let somebody get to you?”
“If you let Reed know where I am, you may not be able to stop them.”
“I need you to trust me right now. I promise I’m not letting anything happen to you no matter what.”
“OK.”
“My house is a fortress. Don’t answer the door. No one can get in here unless you let them in. I’ll be back as soon as I can.”
“Sawyer, come back to me in one piece.”
“I will, mama,” he said, kissing my forehead before walking out of his bedroom.
Seconds later, I jumped when I heard the front door slam. Tears flooded my cheeks as I threw myself on the bed and buried my face in the pillows. No matter how despondent I was, the only thing I could do at the moment was wait.
At some point, Sawyer had come to bed. Not that I was asleep.
After drinking a glass and a half of wine, I thought I could convince myself to get some rest. I had been lying there staring at the ceiling for a long time before Sawyer crawled into bed.
Even with him back, I couldn’t sleep. His light snoring indicated that at least one of us could.
Instead of continuing to try to force myself to fall asleep, I got out of bed tiptoed to the kitchen.
After tossing back the rest of my second glass of wine, I emptied the dishes before putting them in the sink.
Fifteen minutes later, I had knocked out the kitchen.
I walked over to the sink and tore off a few paper towels to dry my hands.
I almost jumped out of my skin when a pair of huge hands landed on my hips. Sawyer’s lips on my neck steadied my heartbeat. “Imagine my surprise when I woke up to a cold, empty bed.”
“I’m sorry. I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to wash dishes while I was up.”
“And clean the entire kitchen. You mopped, Z. I didn’t bring you here to clean my house, mama.”
“I know, but I couldn’t sleep knowing the kitchen was a mess.”
“And I couldn’t sleep without you in my arms. I invited you here to have you in my bed, not in my kitchen.”
“Oh, wow.” I folded my arms over my chest as I turned to face him.
“Not like that, Zenia. I mean I brought you here to make sure you were safe, not because I wanted someone to cook and clean. I can do all that on my own.”
“I like pulling my weight, Sawyer.”
“I understand that, but I like having my woman in bed with me. A few dishes in the sink isn’t the reason you’re up mopping the kitchen at one in the morning. Talk to me.”
“What’s gonna happen to me now?”
“I don’t need you up stressing yourself, sweetheart. Come to bed.”
I sighed. “Sawyer, please. Just tell me how bad it is.”
“I don’t know yet, mama, but I also don’t want you worrying about it. I told you I would take care of you, and that’s what I’m gonna do.”
“Even now?” I asked.
“I’m a man of my word.”
“You don’t have to put yourself in danger for me, Sawyer.”
“Let me worry about the danger. You worry about getting some sleep tonight.”
“I can only try.”
“How about I make you some tea? It helps me sometimes.”
I shrugged. “I’ll try it.”
“How’s your head, mama?”
“All over the place,” I confessed.
“Well let me make us some tea. I bet some warm tea and one of my movies you can’t stand will knock you right out.”
I laughed, but he was probably right. Anything was better than tossing and turning, waiting to be found. There wasn’t much I could clean around here. Tea actually might help. If not, there was still more wine.
“Come on, mama. You might as well grab that bottle too,” he said, obviously reading my mind.