46. JJ Woodford
JJ WOODFORD
A fter a long run on the beach, I’m sweating from every crevice of my body to the point I had to go shirtless for the last twenty minutes. Even though the beaming sun was dipping in and out of the clouds, the sweltering heat was blistering.
I purposely left my phone at home because I needed some alone time. Especially after knowing everything going on with Finn.
I don’t know how long Finn is going to be in rehab, but I want to be here when he gets back to tell him that I’m here to support him, even if I don’t agree with what he did to Ivy. He needs stability, otherwise I fear he’ll end up in a worse state.
Soon, summer will be over, and I won’t have the luxury of visiting this beach. It’s the perfect spot for refreshing your mind and body—lungs included.
My chest heaves as I reach the house. Andrea is in the kitchen making food. I catch my breath, and she glances up at me, red rings around her eyes.
“Hi, Andrea,” I greet as I throw my sweaty T-shirt back on. “How are you?”
“So-so.” She forces a smile. “How are you doing, JJ?”
I shrug. “I’m okay. Have you heard from Finn or the doctors?”
“Yeah, a little.”
“How is he?”
Andrea’s face tightens before she exhales a long breath. “Struggling,” she confesses. “I feel so awful, I had no idea his drinking was this bad. I should have listened to Ivy when she told me. God, I hate myself for it.”
My heart strains. “I saw the signs, and I should have done or said something sooner. I didn’t know he was struggling with what happened to Ivy.”
“Me neither,” she sighs. “We’ve been away a lot and I blame us?—”
“You can’t blame yourself. Finn shut us all out, I just wish I did more.”
Andrea nods. “Me, too. At least I know he’s getting the care and attention he needs.”
“If there is anything I can do,” I say gently. “Or if I’m in the way, please tell me to go.”
“No.” She gives me a sincere smile. “You’re not in the way, JJ. Not at all.”
“I want to see him before I leave. I don’t know when he’s coming home, but I would like that.”
Andrea places her hands on the counter. “Yeah, I definitely think he needs his loved ones around him.”
“Of course. I’m gonna go shower.”
“I’m making lunch.” Andrea turns back to the kitchen. “So come down when you’re ready to eat.”
“Thank you.”
After I head upstairs and jump straight in the shower, my phone lights up on my bed as I get changed. My heart stops in my chest when I find three missed calls from my father.
“Shit,” I curse before reaching for it and tapping on the notification.
I return the call and place my phone against my ear, anxiously chewing on my lip. I haven’t heard from my father in a few days, but multiple missed calls? Something is wrong.
My stomach flips like a rollercoaster. Oh fuck.
I perch on the edge of my bed, my knees giving out because I physically can’t stand anymore. My teeth clamp down on my lip so hard I taste blood in my mouth.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“Pick up the phone, Dad,” I heave, dropping my head into my hands. “Pick up.”
The line cuts, and I hear his voice. “Hi, son.”
“Dad?” I gasp, lifting my head and staring straight at the wall. “Is Mum okay? What happened? Did something happen?”
Every question I want to ask falls from my lips. All I can think about is Mum. My eyeballs burn, and I shake my head. My father breathes, and I grit my fist together. “JJ—” he starts. “Everything is okay.”
I exhale a breath of relief. “Okay?” My voice wobbles.
“More than okay, in fact,” he says, and I can hear the smile in his voice.
My chest blooms with warmth.
“Tell me,” I beg.
“The new treatment the hospital has been trying with mum,” he says slowly. “She’s been showing results. Good results.”
Tears gather in my eyes. “Really?” I whisper under a shuddering breath. “Oh my god.”
“Amazing, isn’t it? We’ve still got a long way to go, but it’s a start, and she’s been fighting.
” My dad’s voice cracks, but there is so much happiness and relief behind the words.
“She’s always been a fighter, and us being here, supporting her every step of the way, is exactly what she needs right now.
She needs as much optimism as possible.”
I drop my head into my hands and release a small sob. “Fuck,” I curse because I don’t know what else to say. My chest feels a thousand times lighter than it did before. The most amazing news I could possibly hear. “She’s getting better?”
My dad hums softly. “They say it’s very promising. They’ll have more to report next week. That way they can see what exactly the treatment is doing, but they’re certain it’s going in the right direction.”
“Can I talk to her? Is she there?” I mumble out my words, wiping my face free of tears.
“Of course,” he says before I hear a muffled sound on the other line.
I clutch my phone tight to my ear, desperate to hear my mother’s voice. “JJ?”
I’m crying again, cheeks damp and vision blurry. “Mum,” I rasp as I shatter into pieces. “How are you?”
“I’m doing okay, my boy. And you?”
My head shakes. I don’t want to talk about myself. This is about her. “Fine,” I say as I straighten my spine. “I heard about the treatment. That’s amazing, Mum. So amazing. I can’t wait to see you. I miss you.”
I hear her sniffle, and my lungs painfully squeeze. “I miss you too, so much,” she says, as if she’s trying not to cry herself. “I’m so proud of you, you know that? I’ve always been so proud of you. I hope you’re having a lovely summer away. Be sure to send pictures. You haven’t sent any!”
A laugh rumbles from deep inside my chest. “Okay, okay.” I grin. “I will. Sorry.”
“What’s been going on with you? Tell me, I want to hear what you’ve been up to.”
“I met someone.” I smile.
My mother gasps. “You have?”
“Yeah, and she’s great.”
“Oh, JJ,” she swoons. “That’s amazing. What is she like?”
I bite my bottom lip as Ivy flashes through my mind. “She’s beautiful, and she’s lovely, and she makes me so happy.”
“Oh my goodness.” Her joy radiates through the phone. “I’m so pleased for you.”
“Hopefully soon she can meet you,” I say optimistically.
“I’d love that. I can’t wait to meet her. What’s her name?”
“Ivy.”
“Beautiful name.”
“Beautiful indeed.”
“Lots of things to look forward to when we get home,” she says cheerily.
My cheeks ache from smiling too hard. “I can’t wait.”
“Me too, my boy. The doctor is coming over to check on me in a bit, so I’ll let you go,” she says, her voice full of warmth and hope. “I love you.”
“I love you too, mum.” I release a shuddering breath. “I’ll call you soon, okay?”
“Of course, speak soon. I love you more.”
“Not true.”
When she laughs, my heart expands, and I wish I could be there with them, holding her hand and supporting my father. A family. But I know I’ll see her soon, when she’s better. “Take care of yourself, JJ.”
Her words have my chest tightening. “You too.”
The call ends and I pull the phone away from my ear. I stare at the screen for a long moment. A smile etches its way onto my lips, and I soar with an emotion beyond relief—it’s all-consuming.
Sadness I’m not there, but reassurance that she’s getting better.
And the first person I want to tell is Ivy.
After getting dressed and heading downstairs, Andrea is setting the table with Ivy, James plating up the food. She catches my eye and offers me a smile as sweet as sugar. I return the gesture, even though my eyes are still slightly blurry from crying a few moments ago.
Her head tilts, as if she knows something’s up. I stare at her for a moment, signalling that I’ll tell her later. She nods, and I smile further, our silent conversations mean the world to me.
She fucking gets me. We get each other. Without even trying.
That’s what I adore about her. She’s always observant, always watching, always understanding.
We sit and eat lunch together, talking about light topics because I know Finn has been the main conversation, and it’s clear they need something else to talk about.
As soon as we clean up after our meal and dismiss ourselves from the table, I grab hold of Ivy in the upstairs hall. She blinks those massive green eyes at me, fanned by her long lashes.
“Hey.” She smiles, making my soul melt.
She has no idea how powerful that smile is. One little flick of her lips and she could send me into an early grave.
“Grab ice cream with me,” I say, tucking a strand of blonde hair behind her shoulder.
Her head tilts. “Ice cream?”
My eyes gleam with joy. “Yeah, please? I need to tell you something.”
“Sure,” she says before rising up onto her toes and kissing my cheek. “I’ll meet you downstairs in a second.”
I bathe in the warmth of her kiss, pleasantly surprised by the action, not taking it for granted. Her affection is my fucking weakness. I could live off her acts of tenderness for the rest of my life.
When I go downstairs and wait for her in the kitchen, I notice her parents watching a movie in the living room. They’re cuddled together, holding hands, and despite their position, they look restless. I can’t imagine how difficult Finn’s situation must be for them.
Ivy comes downstairs a few moments later. “Ready to go?” I ask when she joins me.
“Yeah.” She smiles brightly.
She tells her parents we’re going out, and they tell us to have a nice time. I lead her down the street until we reach the beachfront, the sun still high in the sky.
“What did you want to tell me?”
I suck down a breath and shove my hands into my pockets. “I got a call from my dad today.”
Ivy’s face falls slack. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is good.” I turn to her, not being able to fight the smile on my face. “Great, actually. Mum’s new treatment has had good results, and they think it’s the one that will make her better.”
She claps a hand over her face, both of us stopping outside the ice cream shop. “Oh my god,” she gasps through her fingers. “JJ, that’s amazing!”
Then she’s up on her toes and wrapping her arms around my neck, tugging me as close to her as possible. I smile gently and bury my head into her shoulder, telling myself that it’s okay to be emotional.
“You’re the first person I wanted to tell,” I say into her ear, holding her tighter than before. “I was getting worried, I hadn’t heard from my dad in a while.”
“Thank you,” she murmurs into my T-shirt. “For sharing it with me. I’m so pleased for you, JJ. I’m pleased for all of you.”
I press a kiss to her neck and pull away slowly. My hands stay on her arms as I’m looking down at her. “I remember when you wished my mum a healthy recovery with your shot of sambuca on our first date.”
Her eyes light up like fireworks. “You remember that?”
“I remember every moment with you, princess.” I lean down to nuzzle my nose with hers. “Even if I wanted to forget, I couldn’t.”
Ivy’s eyes flutter shut for a moment, and she presses a soft kiss to my lips. “You are so special,” she whispers, and her words make me shiver. “To me, to Finn, to your parents. You are a breath of fresh air in this world. We’re all lucky to have you.”
I fist the back of her hair, tilting her neck to get better access to her lips. “Don’t make me cry. I’ve already cried today, and that’s one too many times for the year.”
She laughs against my mouth, and it comforts me to the bone. “Let it out, JJ. I don’t care, but you have to know how much you mean to me. In the short time I’ve known you, you’ve changed my life in ways you can’t understand.”
“I do understand,” I groan, kissing her deeper. She hums in surprise when my tongue invades her mouth. “Because you’ve done the same to me.”
Ivy gasps into the kiss, gripping my shoulders. For a moment, I forget we’re standing outside the ice cream parlour until the man behind the counter clears his throat. I pull away from her but keep my arms firmly around her shoulders.
She buries her head into my chest, embarrassment swarming her, but I’m grinning ear to ear. “Sorry, man,” I say to the owner who stares at us like disgusting horny teenagers. “We’ll get whatever she wants.”
Her head raises, and she walks to the counter, looking through the glass at the different selections of ice cream. I watch her cheeks remain tinted pink as she folds her arms over her chest. I smile at her innocence.
“Can we get hazelnut and strawberry, please?” she asks.
The man nods, and I sweep my arms around her from behind. “I wish I could tell Finn.” I lower my head. “He always asks how she’s doing.”
She glances up at me over her shoulder. “You can soon. When he’s home and better. I pray it helps him.”
“I know.” I sigh in agreement. “But I’m sure it will. I know he doesn’t want to live with those demons anymore.”
“He will get better,” she says confidently.
“I think so too.”