Chapter 11 The Cat’s Out of the Bag
The Cat’s Out of the Bag
After two and a half weeks of nonstop escalating pranks and practical jokes, it was all I could think about.
I was eating pranks for breakfast. I was seeing pranks in my sleep.
Cooper was firmly planted in my head, and I found that I didn’t particularly mind.
I even sort of liked it. While we only ever said a few words to each other in passing or between classes, his continued dedication to the game spoke volumes.
Every time I was sure I had won our little war, he would counter.
I would leave a stapler in a Jell-O mold—a classic prank, inspired by The Office.
He would paper the cabinets with fifty copies of my—cheesy and painfully dated—yearbook photo.
I would replace all of the test tubes with manicotti noodles.
He would line the file drawer with plastic to create a live aquarium—complete with goldfish.
It went on and on, day after day, and I loved it. He had the same sense of humor that I did, and it was inexplicably attractive.
Every now and then, I would catch his eye across the cafeteria or when we were trading the room between classes.
The way his lips pulled into a grin that walked the line between devious and mischievous, and the way his eyes darkened when they found mine, had my cheeks flushing, even as I became distinctly aware of my pelvic floor.
I seriously needed to get a grip on myself before I did something stupid. Er—stupider. I was already well passed stupid and barreling straight toward insanity.
***
“What are you doing?” said a low voice.
I froze like a flower dipped in liquid nitrogen. He shouldn’t be here. It was lunch hour, and he should have been in the cafeteria or his apartment or anywhere that wasn’t the classroom. Alone. With me.
But in hindsight, I shouldn’t have been surprised.
He probably came to gloat about today’s prank—admittedly, his best yet.
When the students and I heard a meow during first period, I assumed we were hearing things.
But, when we heard another meow about ten minutes later, then the wild goose—cat—chase began.
By the end of first period, we had found three tiny speakers, the size of a penny, hidden around the classroom, and I had assumed that was everything. But when the meowing started up again during third period, that class somehow managed to find two more speakers.
At this point, I was extra confident that we had all of them. Five “cats” seemed more than sufficient for a respectable—and distracting—prank.
But right before the bell rang signaling the end of third period, we heard another distinct meow. I considered leaving the “cat” in the room. My classes were done for the day, so I wouldn’t be terrorized by this prank any longer. But my pride wouldn’t let me do that.
What would my students think if there was still meowing tomorrow? I couldn’t let them think that Cooper had beaten me. And more importantly, I couldn’t have Cooper thinking he had gotten one over on me either.
No. I had to find the damn cat speaker.
The sound had come from somewhere in the back of the room.
I was sure of that. One speaker had already been discovered in a lab coat pocket.
But we hadn’t found anything in the cabinets yet, so I decided to start my cat hunt there.
I hoped it would meow again and draw me right to it.
Otherwise, this little task could take me all afternoon. The speakers were teeny.
Naturally, I was bent over on hands and knees with my head in a lower cabinet when the door opened behind me.
I knew it was Cooper without having to look.
There was a shift in the air, and my skin suddenly felt too tight for my bones.
We hadn’t been alone together since the night of orientation, weeks ago, a confrontation that had left me shaken for days.
A lot had changed since then. Cooper might still think I was a spoiled princess, but I was confident that he didn’t hate me anymore. Hell, if the circumstances were even slightly different, I would probably consider us friends.
But that didn’t mean that I loved him finding me with my ass in the air and my skirt riding up my thighs.
Just perfect.
As gracefully as I could, I straightened up, adjusted my skirt, and closed the cabinet before turning to meet his crooked grin. He looked great today. His hair was perfectly in place, as per his usual, but the top two buttons of his Oxford shirt were undone, displaying the long column of his neck.
I assumed what I hoped was a nonchalant posture and pasted on a sunny smile for good measure.
“Look what the cat dragged in,” I said.
“Did you know that the loudest cat purr ever recorded was sixty-seven decibels?”
I was momentarily dumbstruck. I don’t know what I had been expecting him to say, but it hadn’t been that. “You don’t say,” I said.
“That’s nearly the volume of a vacuum cleaner. Most cats purr at twenty-five decibels which is more like a whisper.”
“I didn’t know you were so into cats.”
“I’m not.”
“Or acoustics.”
“I’m not.”
This might be the strangest conversation I ever had if I hadn’t had the context. “Then why are we talking about cats?” I teased.
He looked shy, his lips quirked into a crooked grin and eyes shining with mischief and amusement—and something else that I couldn’t identify but made my insides liquefy. His hands were in his pockets, and he rocked back on his heels.
“Looking for something?” he asked.
There it was. I was right—he had come to tease me. I had no intention of giving him the satisfaction.
I wiped my palms on my skirt. “Oh, nothing. I thought I dropped something earlier, but I must not have after all.”
I brushed past him, trying to casually resume my search. I opened one of the upper cabinets along the back wall and stood on my toes, craning to see to the back of the shelves.
“Did you drop something in there too?”
His voice was close, right over my shoulder. A shiver ran deliciously up my spine. I paused, hands flat on the cool surface of the counter, to consider my next move. Was I okay with him being this close? Yes. Yes, I really was.
Slowly, I turned to face him. He was still smirking. It both thrilled and irked me—this little game we were playing.
I loved games. I had always been competitive.
“Just checking the supplies.” My voice came out breathier than I would have liked.
Cooper stepped forward and leaned a hip against the counter to my right. A few, measly inches separated us. I could practically feel electricity sparking off of him like a human Van de Graaf generator. Every nerve synapse was on high alert.
I tilted my head back so I could meet his eyes again. They weren’t black, like I had thought. The color was a deep, rich brown, like hot cocoa or espresso. I wanted to drink them in.
“Did you find everything you were expecting?” His warm breath ghosted over my face, smelling like mint and herbal tea. I began to feel lightheaded. After spending so much time thinking about him and stealing glances over the last few weeks, having him this close felt intoxicating.
“No,” I breathed. “I haven’t found what I’m looking for.”
He leaned a little closer, dipping his face toward mine. Our noses nearly touched. Our lips were just inches apart.
“And what’s that?” he asked.
It would be nothing to close the space between us, to slide my hand around the back of his head and pull his lips onto mine.
I bet his hair would be soft.
I bet his lips would be firm.
It was a bad idea. I had to see him again tomorrow and the next day and the day after that.
But it could be so good. I bet he would make it so good—
Then, the damn cat meowed.
Right behind us.
At least sixty-seven decibels.
Cooper ripped away from me as if someone had dumped a bucket of carbonic acid over his head. His face was flushed, and he sucked in a deep breath. He stared at me with a mix of desire and horror.
“We can’t do this,” he rasped. Then, he turned and bolted from the room before I could respond. The door closed behind him with a bang that reverberated through my bones.
Alone in the empty classroom, my mind and body reeled. I leaned back against the counter, gripping the edge for support, and shook my head to clear the fog.
What the actual fuck had just happened?
He had been right there.
So close.
Too close.
Not close enough…
My skin felt like it was on fire. I couldn’t guess whether Cooper’s touch would cool the flame or stoke it even higher. But it looked like I wasn’t going to be finding out any time soon based on the way he bolted. He was probably halfway back to Brookside by now. Or maybe halfway to the moon.
I raked my hands through my hair. Flustered. Agitated.
In general, this interaction had been a huge improvement over our previous interactions, but it hadn’t been satisfying. I ached in the worst way, and I wanted more.
When the gears in my mind finally started turning again, one thought jumped to the front—his parting words.
We.
We can’t do this.
I might have started this—initiated the pranks and the subsequent flirtation—but he had been right there with me.
And we both knew it.
It took me another few minutes to collect myself enough to leave Franklin Hall. The last cat speaker could be damned. Pulling out my phone as I walked, eating up the sidewalk in long strides, I thumbed a quick text to Silvia.
Mel: I did something stupid.
Mel: Maybe.
The phone was barely back in my pocket when it buzzed with my friend’s reply.
Silvia: ?!?!?!
Silvia: Details.
Silvia: Now.
I sighed heavily as I left Franklin Hall and crossed the empty quad, heading back toward my apartment. Lunch in a noisy cafeteria was the last thing I needed right now.
I looked back at my phone. Where to begin?
Mel: You know the prank war with Cooper? Well… things might have escalated today.
My phone started ringing within a millisecond. “Hey, Sil—”
“Melanie Elizabeth Burke,” she whisper-shouted into the phone. “Please tell me—for the love of all that is good and just in this ugly world—that you didn’t fuck the abs-hole!”
I replied in a whisper too. “No! We just almost kissed—”
“Kissed? That’s even worse!” she hissed.
“Almost-kissed!” I insisted. “We didn’t actually do anything. And why are we whispering?”
“Ugh. Hold on.” There was some muffled bumping and shuffling on the other end of the line like she had her hand over the receiver rather than just pressing the mute button.
A few dried leaves crunched under my shoes as I meandered down a sidewalk, phone propped against my ear.
It was only September, but fall was definitely in the air.
The October Lovers were on to something.
The trees, just starting to show hints of yellow among the green, would be completely gorgeous in another couple of weeks when they reached their peak orange and red hues.
“Okay, I’m somewhere I can talk now.” Silvia’s voice sounded normal again.
“You were just explaining,” I prompted, “how almost-kissing Cooper is somehow worse than fucking him. For the record—I disagree.”
She sighed the most dramatic sigh, and I rolled my eyes.
“It’s like Julia Roberts said in Pretty Woman,” Silvia explained with the air of someone repeating a common sense rule to a stubborn child. “You can fuck a guy and not have feelings. It doesn’t have to mean anything. But kissing is where the romance is. Kissing means you’re falling for him.”
I scoffed at the absurdity. “I’m not falling for Cooper.”
“Then why did you almost-kiss him?”
I walked slightly out of my way to step on a particularly crunchy looking leaf. I wrinkled my nose when it did not crunch.
“I don’t know,” I said helplessly. “I was thinking about him, and then he was just sort of there. He smelled so good.”
“Ugh. Did you learn nothing from the time I fucked Kenneth? I had to sit next to him for the next two years and try not to think about his weird moles.”
“I know. I know. It was a moment of weakness. I promise I’m staying away from him.”
“Liar.” Her voice was deadpan. I could practically see her roll her eyes through the phone.
“Excuse me?”
“We both know you’re not going to stay away from him.”
“And how do we know that?” I challenged.
“Mel, you smelled him. You’re in trouble.”
A gust of wind blew across the lake, cutting through the thin fabric of my blouse and skirt. I should have worn a jacket this morning. I should have done other things differently this morning too.
“Tell me something I don’t know,” I said.
“You have to stay away from him.”
“I know that.”
“But you’re you, and you’re already thinking about how to get close again.”
I bit my lip, considering my answer before I replied. “I know that, too.”
Back in my apartment, I flopped down heavily on my bed and pulled a thick pillow over my face.
If Cooper had already been a problem, now he was ten times worse.
I could still feel his breath on my face.
My skin still burned in the places where I wished he had touched me.
I tossed the pillow and retrieved my vibrator from my nightstand. I didn’t need lube.