65. Spencer
SPENCER
By the time we got back to the house, I’d tapped my supply of adrenaline. There was no anger or disappointment or even pity left. All my body had left to run on was fumes.
Luckily, I didn’t need to be so ‘on’ here. I had people to count on, family who could step in to get me over the finish line. Once we parked the bikes, Dom led the kids into the mansion, Leo bringing up their rear and doing her best to keep Abi laughing.
Meanwhile, my brain was so full of sludge that I could hardly get down my bike’s kickstand. Had it always been so slippery?
“Hey, are you okay?” Kiera’s sweet voice startled me from my stupor. I hadn’t even heard her walking over.
“Yeah, just feeling a little sluggish,” I grumbled, finally getting the kickstand into place. “I’m all good.”
“You don’t have to pretend,” Kiera grabbed my shoulders, taking a peek over her shoulder. “The kids are inside. We have a minute if you want to just… let some of it out.”
The last thing I wanted to do was burden Kiera with the way I was feeling — she’d already sacrificed so much, completely risking her own safety to rescue the kids. But if I wanted any chance of clearing the muck from my brain, I wasn’t sure that I had another choice.
The kids need me fresher than this.
With a sigh, I leaned into her grip. “I don’t know. I just feel stupid. I want to be mad at the kid, but I should have known better. He wasn’t ready for such a sensitive story, and it was on me to keep that truth until he was old enough to handle it.”
Kiera dipped her head to catch my gaze. “Hey, you’re being way too hard on yourself. Caleb had a right to know. You did your best to share that information with him delicately. These sorts of things happen. It’s not ideal, but taking on unnecessary blame won’t make it any easier.”
I frowned skeptically. “You don’t need to comfort me…”
I don’t deserve it.
But my sweet Bunny couldn’t help wanting to help.
“I want to…” She glanced over her shoulder, distracted by one of the first floor lights flickering on and off — no doubt Abi was trying to signal me to come back into the house.
With a sigh, Kiera cupped my cheek. “Listen, try not to be too hard on yourself if you can help it. It was a long fucking night, and we’ve got a long couple of days ahead of us. But soon enough, all of this chaos will be over.
“Zeus will be ours, Isaac will be buried, and I can finally come out of hiding. We won’t have to move as carefully to do what’s right.
We can shift our focus to Abi and Caleb, setting them up for a life after Bill.
” The idea of that sparked something in my chest, helping to revive my hardened heart.
Kiera smiled, stroking my cheekbone with her thumb, “Until then, just be gentle with yourself: if not for you then for me, okay?”
I met her shimmering green eyes, and for a second, the exhaustion lifted from my muscles. “Okay… but only because you’re so damn cute.”
“I’ll take it,” Kiera smirked, kissing me on the cheek. “Now let’s get inside before the kids start missing you. I think you’ll feel better after a good night’s sleep.”
As I followed my fiery redhead inside, I wanted to believe in her vision of the future. But it felt like an endless abyss of uncertainty stretched between us and that dream. And though I knew in my mind that Kiera was right, worry nagged at the pit of my stomach.
Despite all logic, doubt whispered from the dark corners of my mind with a single, dark promise: in rescuing the kids, I’d put all of us in unspeakable danger.