Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
Wynter
Work is a bear the rest of the week. Taking Monday off left me with a ton to catch up on but the good news is that with Ross and Harley on tour, and no River to worry about, I don’t have anything to do except work.
I stay late Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, not getting home until close to nine all three nights, so I can take care of everything and leave a little early on Friday.
My boss wasn’t happy I left early but when I showed her that everything was done, there wasn’t much she could say since I worked late for three days straight.
And now I’m back on a plane, heading for Seattle so I can meet up with Ross and the band.
I’m a little nervous about flying back so soon but once they start heading east, it’ll be a lot more difficult.
Not that they tour in a straight line in any direction.
They’re going from Winnipeg to Des Moines to Houston and then they’ll make a detour to Wichita before turning around and hitting Denver.
They’re also not going to be touring by bus anymore.
Once they leave Canada, they’ll be flying in a chartered jet.
With the wives and kids tagging along, it’s just easier to get on a plane, so that’s what they’re going to do.
I know Harley is relieved because keeping River entertained on a bus for hours on end is hard.
Even though they’ve hired a nanny to help out.
Since there’s both River and Z and Presley’s little boy, Jeremy, sharing a nanny makes sense and will allow both couples to have alone time. Especially when the guys have a show. It’s too loud and chaotic for the kids so they can leave them at the hotel without having to worry.
Harley’s always been very hands-on with River, so I know it’s taken some adjusting on her part, but she and Tommy are busy rebuilding their relationship and being on tour adds a level of difficulty.
One that I’m not sure how I’ll handle when it comes to Ross and me.
I was way too busy at work to talk to him about anything serious during the week, so I’m planning to make a point of it now that we’re in the same place again.
I want him to follow his heart, no matter how scary it is for me.
What kind of girlfriend would I be if I kept him from chasing his dreams?
Especially the one that was so brutally ripped away from him the first time.
That he’s come so far is a testament to his strength and fortitude, so I’m not going to be responsible for telling him not to do it.
Even though it terrifies me.
Even though I know I’m going to be a wreck every time I see a picture of him online when we’re not together.
“You made it!” The first person I see when I get backstage is Harley. She comes over to hug me. “They’re about to go on stage.”
“There was traffic,” I say, “but I’m glad I got here for the show.”
She grins. “Ross has been amazing all week.”
“Hold that thought.” I spot him coming around the corner talking to Pete and he breaks away the moment he sees me.
We run toward each other and he scoops me, spinning me around once before kissing me. “Hi.”
“Hi.” His eyes twinkle. “I’m really glad to see you. It’s been four days but it feels like four months.” One of his hands travels to my ass and squeezes.
“Go be talented and sexy,” I say, laughing. “We can make up for lost time when you’re done.”
He kisses me once more and then goes back to whatever he and Pete were doing.
“How are things between you?” Harley asks as the band gears up for the show.
“I mean, last weekend was amazing. I barely talked to him this week since I missed Monday and wanted to leave a little early today, so I worked late every night.”
“Liking the job any better?”
“No.”
“Have you given any more thought to being a travel nurse or whatever?”
“I think about it a lot,” I admit. “And I’m pretty sure I’m going to do it. I just need to have the time to figure out where to apply. There are a few companies and I want to take the time to compare salary and benefits.”
She nods. “That’s smart. And maybe take a few weeks off before you start, you know? So you can spend time with Ross. And me.”
I grin. “Oh, please, you can’t possibly have missed me, not now that you’re back with Tommy.”
She frowns. “Those two things don’t have anything to do with each other. You’re my sister. He’s the man I love. I can miss you while still being present for him and River.”
“I know. I’m kidding.” I look over at Presley, who joins us.
“You’re back!” she says with a grin. “I’m so glad.”
“Me too.”
And I realize I am.
I feel far more at home here with my sister and her extended Onyx Knight family than I ever did anywhere else.
In some ways, I never felt like I fit in anywhere else.
Yes, I sometimes felt like a third wheel with Harley and Tommy, but the guys in the band were like brothers to me so it was different.
And now that I’m with Ross, it’s even better.
Almost like I’ve finally found my place in the world.
“You and Ross make such a great couple,” Presley says. “Honestly, I never thought about him as a man until now. I know, that sounds ridiculous, but he’s older and in my head, he was the band’s tour manager. I never thought about him as someone’s lover.”
“Or as the lead singer of a rock band,” Harley says with a grin.
“He’s been awesome,” Jesse adds, joining us.
“The band is so relieved he’s been able to step in,” Harley says. “Now Kingston can take the time he needs to properly heal his voice.”
“I have to tell you guys, I’ll be pretty excited if he starts performing as Ross Rockit solo,” Presley says. “My aunt is a huge fan. She’s going to lose her mind.”
We all chuckle.
“What do you think about all that?” Harley asks me.
“He has to follow his heart,” I say. “Am I excited about women all over the world throwing themselves at him? No. But if he’s happy, then so am I.”
“It’s all about trust,” Jesse says thoughtfully. “I know Kellan isn’t going to cheat on me. I just do. He loves me. I love him. We have a bond. Could it happen? Of course. I’m not stupid. But we put in the work to make sure it doesn’t.”
“But you’re here,” I say quietly. “You’re on tour with him. I can’t be. It’s going to be exponentially harder for us.”
The ladies are all quiet for a beat, as if mulling it over.
“You could be here too,” Harley says.
“You know how I feel about taking money from you,” I say firmly.
“What about taking money from him?” Presley asks gently. “I mean, if you’re going to be together—”
“It’s been a week,” I interrupt. “Six months from now, yes, we might need to have this conversation. But right now? I just want to fall in love without thinking about all the other stuff.”
My sister looks like she wants to say something, but she doesn’t. Instead, she smiles and takes my arm. “Well, then let’s just think about falling in love.”
“I love you,” I whisper gratefully.
“Love you more.”
We wander closer to the stage, pausing to put in earplugs. It’s so loud this close but she’s always loved watching from as close as possible and now I feel the same pull. To be as close to the magic as we possibly can.
“Is it weird?” I ask her.
“What?” she asks curiously.
“The need to be this close to them. Even when they’re performing. Like, shouldn’t we be bored with this part of it and just be thinking about the men they are outside of music?”
She shakes her head. “But music is who they are. I can’t speak for you, but the man I love is a musician.
That’s his identity. Not all of it, obviously, but without music, he wouldn’t be Tommy Bane.
I don’t know who he’d be, and maybe I would love him anyway, but the man I love is this larger-than-life, enigmatic, talented rock and roll drummer.
That’s who he is, so yes, I want to be near him when he plays because it’s part of him. ”
“Would it be the same if he was a surgeon? Like, would you want to be in the operating room?”
“I think it’s different because it’s music, and I love the music too. This is why celebrities have such rabid fans—we’re drawn to specific kinds of talent. I imagine there’s some of that in every industry. This one is just more fun.”
I gaze over at Ross, who’s doing something with a microphone, and it occurs to me that music is part of him, just like it is Tommy.
That’s why I was so insistent about it when we first met. Almost as if I knew how much he missed it before he did.
So, no matter how uncomfortable it makes me, I have to let him be who he is.
And figure out who I am in the process.