6. Melissa Domaine
By the time I got back to my villa, my nerves were all over the place.
I shut the door behind me and just stood there with my back pressed to it for a second, staring at nothing. The ocean was still out there, the sun was still shining, the world was still moving like normal, but inside my chest everything felt off.
I had walked over there thinking I was just going to apologize, say thank you, and go on about my day.
But that was not what happened.
The way Roman looked at me. The way his voice sounded when he said I scared him. The way he talked about seeing that man’s hands on me.
All of that was still sitting right on my skin.
I pushed off the door and headed to the small table by the window, dropping my phone and the half-finished bottle of water he had given me. For a second, I just stared at it.
Nobody really did that for me.
The words I had thrown out in his villa came back to me, and I realized how true they were.
Niggas had taken me out. Niggas had spent money. Niggas had ran game, lied, and wasted my time.
But staying, watching, and protecting me when I didn’t even know I needed it was different.
I kicked my sandals off and went out onto the balcony, leaning on the rail. From here, I could see the line where the sky kissed the water, that pretty blue-on-blue that was supposed to be calming. It helped a little, but not enough to quiet everything going on in my head.
I thought about last night in pieces.
The bar, drinks, and of course that man.
My body going heavy and weird.
Roman’s voice.
I thought about this morning, waking up scared and angry and confused, snapping on the only person who had actually been there.
Then I thought about how he looked when I told him nobody really did that kind of shit for me.
He did not laugh. He did not act surprised.
He just said, “They should.”
And the crazy part was, I believed him.
I hated that I did, but I did.
I wrapped my arms around myself and let out a long breath.
“Get it together, Melissa,” I mumbled.
Roman made things complicated.
Before this trip, I had him in a nice little box in my mind.
He was fine, charming, dangerous in his own way, and I was attracted to him.
I could admit that. But I also told myself it was not going to be nothing real.
I was not signing up to be nobody’s anything again.
I was just trying to live my life, heal my heart, and have my fun.
But this?
Him pulling me away from some man who saw me as something to drag, and then staying up all night in a chair making sure I was still breathing. Not to mention the way he looked at me. I wasn’t just some girl he met at his club.
That messed with my rules.
I stayed out on the balcony until the wind started getting on my nerves. Then I went back inside and flopped across the bed, staring up at the ceiling.
My brain would not shut up.
Every time I closed my eyes, I saw Roman’s face up close, felt the ghost of his thumb under my chin, heard his voice telling me I needed to stop moving like I was by myself in this world.
But what little did he know I was by myself that was the whole point.
Depending on people had backfired on me too many times. Loving people had cost me too much. I had decided I was done putting myself in places where somebody else’s choices could ruin my life.
And here comes Roman Blake, standing in a doorway on some island, talking about he wanted to make sure I was safe.
It would have been easier if he was just a cold-hearted asshole, but he wasn’t.
I turned over and grabbed my phone. Charlee had texted me in our group chat again.
Charlee: You alive?
Fee: She probably somewhere laid up.
Charlee: As she should be.
I rolled my eyes, but a small smile still pulled at my mouth.
Me: I’m alive. Y’all annoying.
Charlee: You sound stressed.
Fee: You drunk or you dickmatized?
Me: Good night. Blocked.
Charlee: LMAOOO you not blocking nobody.
Fee: Sooo… you and Roman talked yet?
I stared at that last message for a second, then sighed.
Me: Yeah, we talked.
Charlee: AND???
Fee: Don’t start playing dumb now.
Me: He helped me with something. That’s it.
Charlee: Girl, please.
Fee: Mhm.
I locked my phone before they could double-team me with more questions.
It was not that I did not want to tell them.
It was that I did not know how to explain what I was feeling when I didn’t even understand it myself.
All I knew was, for the first time in a long time, I felt… seen.
And that was dangerous.
I must have dozed off, because the next thing I knew, the light in the room had shifted and my phone said it was just past seven. My stomach growled, and I remembered Roman ordering us food earlier.
I pressed my lips together.
I could stay in here and pretend that whole moment in his villa didn’t mean anything.
Or I could stop acting like a punk about a man I clearly wanted.
Did I want the headache that came with that? No. Did my body and my heart care about logic? Also no.
I got up and checked myself in the mirror. My hair was still decent, my face was bare but not terrible, and I smelled like my vanilla body butter and ocean air.
That would have to be enough.
I slipped on a soft romper and some slides, then stood at the door for a good thirty seconds, arguing with myself.
You do not need to go over there. You already said thank you. You already apologized. You don’t owe him nothing else.
Then I heard another voice in my head.
You also want to see him again and you know it.
I sucked my teeth at my own subconscious and stepped out anyway.
The air between our villas felt heavier than it should have for such a short walk. When I got to his door, I took a quick breath and knocked.
This time, I did not have a speech ready.
I just knew I was not done with whatever had started in that room.
When the door opened and Roman looked down at me, that same pull hit me straight in the chest.
His eyes slid over my face, then down my body, then back up again.
“Hey,” I said, suddenly feeling way more aware of how close we were standing.
“Hey,” he answered, voice low.
For a second, we just looked at each other.
“I was wondering if you ate yet,” I said, hating how shy I sounded.
One side of his mouth kicked up. “You checking on me now?”
I rolled my eyes a little to cover how flustered I felt. “Don’t do too much. I said.”
He stepped back from the door. “Come in, Melissa.” And I did as I was told.
And even though I tried to play it cool, every part of me knew I was walking deeper into something I was not going to be able to easily walk out of.
And that scared me almost as much as last night did.