Chapter Sixty Three Willow
Chapter Sixty Three
Willow
“Move in with me.” Dragna whispers into my ear as we lay tangled together in his bed. I practically live here anyway, but there’s still the lingering thought of leaving Alina on her own that scares me.
I don’t want her to spiral more than she already is and I feel like if anything was to happen to her it would be my fault. But I know that I can’t stop my own happiness just because of someone else, even if that someone is my best friend.
That’s been a topic my therapist and I have been tackling recently.
How I want to help everyone else which leads to me letting go of my own wants and needs.
She also said I may have formed a strong trauma bond with Alina, but I quickly shut that down.
The woman has no clue how much of a sister Alina is to me and has been since we both graced this earth as babies.
Only Alina and I know how strong our bond is and I won’t have anyone trash talk that love no matter how many PhD’s they have hanging on their office walls.
Part of me wants to stay in the chapter of my life where it’s just me and my girls, where we are all happy living our lives and partying together and not have things change, but the bigger part of me wants to say yes to Dragna.
I’ve wanted to say yes since he first asked me if I’m being truly honest with myself so maybe I do have to just bite the bullet and talk to Alina about it.
“Let me talk to Alina first.” I say as he kisses his way down my neck while sliding a hand up my side.
We haven’t had sex since before Boston. I haven’t been able to bring myself to want to have sex since what happened the night they rescued me. Every time I think about what could have happened, what did already happen before Nero walked in, it makes me want to throw up.
I feel more confident now though, more sure of myself and brave enough to ask and I know Dragna will take things at my pace.
I relish in the feeling of him touching me, my senses coming alive and an ache for him blooms within me.
“Before I leave today to go back to work, I want you to do something for me.” I say, moaning at the feel of his hands on me as they feather up and down my ribs.
“Anything moya dusha.”
“Well, it’s actually doing something to me, rather than for me.” I laugh nervously and his eyes lock on mine.
“You don’t have to do this if you’re not ready. You know I don’t care how long it takes. Even if you never wanted to again, you know I wouldn’t care and that I understand.” He says as he peppers my neck with kisses.
“I promise you, I need you. Like, right now.” I moan as I take his hand in mine, bringing it slowly down my sternum to the top of my underwear.
I feel starved of him, like all he will have to do is slide a finger over my underwear and I’ll come there and then.
“Dragna please.” I breathe out as his hand does exactly what I just imagined. He slides his hand over me, cupping me and applying pressure with the heel of his hand where I need it most. I moan out as he locks eyes with me again.
“Words, use them.” He whispers softly.
“More. I want more.” I say breathlessly, and he does everything I ask as we spend the entire morning in bed not even stopping to come up for air.
———————————————————
Dragna told me my boss wouldn’t be mad at me for showing up to work late today after we got carried away this morning which only makes me wonder how much he paid the woman while everything was going on to allow Alina and I to still have jobs when we returned.
It’s my first day back and he drove me here himself when Alina said she was making her own way because she was also going to be late.
We arrive outside the store and he parks up on the sidewalk before turning the car off and facing me.
“I have something for you.” He says as he reaches into the backseat and pulls out a tiny pink paper bag.
“If this is something else to wear with another tracker in it you know I’m going to kill you right?” I raise an eyebrow to him and he shakes his head while trying to hold back his laughter.
We had a very long talk about everything, but mostly the tracker, and while he knows he shouldn’t have done it without my knowledge, he stands by his decision that it was the right thing to do otherwise they never would have found us that night.
I told him because I knew the truth about absolutely everything, I understood why he did it but I still wasn’t happy about it.
One of his men found the necklace on the ground where I threw it that night and Dragna had given it back to me and told me it would always be there if I wanted the extra safety measure, but it would always be my choice now on whether I wear it.
“Just open it moya dusha.” He says, pulling me from my thoughts and I take it from him and pull apart the ribbon tying the two handles together.
I reach inside while staring at him, watching his face for any giveaways as to what it could be. He just continues to look at me with the most adorable smile on his face and I finally look down as I lift pieces of paper from the bag.
“What is this?” I ask as my breathing stops and I take in the words written on the sheets of paper.
“It’s yours.” He replies and I still haven’t let out a breath as I continue scanning the words over and over again.
“How… Dragna. I can’t accept this!” My voice comes out squeaky and high pitched as tears begin to well up in my eyes.
“You can. You deserve it and I know it will make you happy as well as giving you something to keep your mind occupied in a healthy way.” He says all too easily because he truly knows me inside and out.
“When?” Is all I can say.
“Lev was actually the mastermind behind it all when you were gone. Your boss wasn’t too pleased her only two workers wouldn’t be showing up to work for a while.” He huffs out a laugh.
“So you just bought the bookstore…” I breathe out still in disbelief.
“We bought the bookstore. It’s yours. Yours and Alina’s, you both own equal parts, everything has been transferred over to you and her.
” He says as easily as if he’s talking about buying me a slice of cake or a cup of coffee…
but no, he bought the bookstore. The one place that has always brought me happiness.
The one place he knows I get lost in and that transforms me to other worlds away from my own when I need it most.
He bought me the fucking bookstore.
The realisation hits me and I can’t stop myself from launching across the car at him and landing on his lap as I throw my arms around him and tears begin to stream down my face.
“This is too much and I don’t know how I’m ever going to repay you or show you the same level of love and kindness but thank you Dragna. Thank you. Thank you.”
I start to cry real happy ugly tears as well as laugh at how crazy the love of my life is.
“Thank Lev too, it was his idea, I just agreed to it and paid for it all.” Dragna says as he laughs along with me.
“And your happiness is the only payment I need. You already show me more than enough love and kindness. This is actually nothing compared to what I would do to show you how much I love you if I knew you wouldn’t be mad at me for spending so much money.” He adds and I smack his chest playfully.
“I just can’t believe this. I can’t believe you. I can’t believe this is my life.” I shake my head smiling at him and he takes my hand and kisses the back of it.
“Come on, your happy place awaits.” He says, nodding out the window to where Alina and Lev stand, thankfully not screaming at each other, as well as Ivan, Anton, Mikhail, Milena and even my parents.
My parents are starting to come round to Dragna again.
When they could reach me while I was in Boston, Dragna had to tell them the truth.
He kept them updated, told them everything and while my father wanted to go head to head with Dragna, after they saw me again and saw I was still choosing this man, they had no choice but to begin to trust him again.
I look at everyone inside the bookstore, all wave from inside the shop window and I can’t believe this is our crazy, messed up family. I let my laughter flow out, feeling so loved, so happy and finally feeling a little bit more peace.