Chapter 26
Twenty-Six
Meri
I'd been leaving Lessa's house when Zasen had asked for Omden and Drozel to go with him to City Hall.
That had been enough to convince Lessa to come back with me.
Together, we made dinner. She showed me how a few things worked, since I was still learning all the Dragon facilities.
The sink was easy. Lighting the oven was not.
We were finishing up when the men tromped back in. I sighed, knowing they'd just carried a trail of dirt through the door with them - but they weren't laughing. Lessa seemed to forget all about the meal and headed into the main room. I set down the roast bird first, then followed a moment later.
"Well?" Lessa demanded. "Zasen made this sound like a big deal. What's going on?"
"Sit," Omden told her, gesturing to the sofa. "You too, Meri."
I claimed the closest cushion to where I was. Lessa took the spot right beside me. Drozel claimed one chair, shoving something down beside him, and Omden shifted to lean against the wall.
"What is it?" Lessa demanded.
"We leave in the morning, Less," Drozel told her. "Reapers rode in this afternoon. Sounds like the Moles hit them this time. Ayla's worried about it."
"What do you mean?" I asked.
So Lessa explained, "The Reapers are where your hunters get the plants. They have a camp close to the compound you were in." She glanced at Drozel, then Omden, and back to me. "In my lifetime, I can't remember Moles ever attacking them."
"Me either," Drozel admitted.
"So people are hurt?" This didn't sound good at all.
"Some are coming here," Drozel explained. "Others won't, simply because they don't have enough carts."
"Like the thing that brought you," Omden added.
I nodded to show I was keeping up. "So why are you leaving?"
"Both of us," Omden clarified. "Meri, they need hands to help them recover.
Lorsa's bigger than their camp. Reapers move in groups of a few hundred, not a few thousand.
They also don't keep permanent homes, and it's almost time for them to move.
So with all those people injured, they're going to need help loading and getting out of there safely. "
"Okay," I said. "I can help."
Lessa laughed once. "You want to go into a warzone?"
"I..." I looked between her and the men. "What's a warzone?"
"Death and destruction," Drozel told me. "Meri, it's like what happened at the hospital that night, but without the building. Just injured people all over, and nowhere to hide if the Moles come back."
"Oh." I swallowed hard. "But I can help, and it sounds like they need people who can heal."
"So will the ones who come here," Lessa hurried to say.
"Good point," Omden agreed. "It's also a two day walk to get there, Meri. I'm not sure you're up for that yet."
"But I can help the ones here, right?"
Because I had to do something. These people had done so much for me. I didn't know the Reapers, but they were the ones who'd gotten me off the tree. That meant they'd saved me too, so I had to help somehow. It felt wrong not to!
"I'll make sure of it," Lessa told me.
"Yeah..." Drozel grumbled. "But if we're leaving, Meri, would you like Lessa to crash here with you?"
"Crash?" I asked.
"Stay," Omden hurried to explain. "She can use the other guest room, or ours. Then you won't need to move around again. Or you can stay here alone, and she'll be right next door if you run out of food or need anything. You can also stay with her, I'm sure."
"Whichever you want," Lessa assured me.
I glanced down, but my eyes found Omden across the room on their own. Almost like he was waiting for me, the man smiled. Subtly, he nodded, making it clear this was okay.
"Maybe you can stay here with me?" I asked Lessa. "But that's silly, right? We'll have to go to your house to sew anyway, so maybe - "
"It's as far from here as there," Lessa hurried to assure me. "You also have all your things here, and I have enough, I promise."
"I'd like to stay here, if that's okay," I told them. "I'm not used to moving around this much, and I really like the bed I'm in, and all my clothes are here."
"So we'll stay here," Lessa said, making that sound final.
There was just one more thing I needed to know. "How long will you both be gone?" I looked at Omden first, because Drozel was already watching me.
And yet, when my eyes landed on Drozel, he didn't smile. That wasn't good. Thankfully, he didn't glower at me the way Gideon used to. Drozel and Omden never did that, though. They were happy. They were gentle, and even when Drozel got loud or big, he always stopped.
"We don't know," Drozel told me. "At least a week, but probably more."
"Might be as long as a month," Omden said. "Lessa, you know where the money is, right?"
She huffed, giving him a weary look. "I have money."
"I know," Omden promised. "But you do know, right?"
She chuckled. "Yes, Ommy, I know."
"When do you leave?" I asked next. "You said in the morning, but when?"
"Dawn," Drozel said. "You'll still be sleeping when we head out." Then he pulled at the thing he'd shoved behind him. "So I - we - got you this on our way back." And he passed over a doll.
But it wasn't really a doll. This one wasn't made to look like a child. It was round and soft. There were appendages jutting off it, and a bubble-shaped head. Most of it was brown, but there were bits of white as well. Turning it over, I realized it was a bird.
"Is this for the baby?" I asked, not sure what to do with it.
"No," Drozel said, turning in his chair to face me. "That's what we call a stuffed animal, Meri. It's supposed to keep you safe, and that one looks like a sparrow, so I thought you might like it."
"Most of us slept with them as kids," Omden explained. "Plenty of us kept them as adults."
"I have half a dozen," Lessa said.
"But why?" I asked. "It's very soft, but I don't understand."
Drozel waved for Lessa to move, then claimed the spot beside me. Reaching across, he slipped the stuffed thing from my hands, and turned it over in his.
"Dragons tell our children these chase away evil. I'm sure they really don't, but they're good to hug when you're asleep, and they make you feel better when you're nervous. You can squeeze it, or throw it when you're mad. They're soft, so they won't break things."
"But it stops the bad stuff," Omden said.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeah," Drozel said. "See, instead of pulling your arms tight and ducking your head, if you have this, then maybe you can just hold it?
Since I - we - won't be here to keep you safe, I wanted to make sure you had something for when you're worried.
Not even all the way scared, Meri. Just worried, because a lot has happened to you lately, and you deserve something to keep you safe. "
"But it's just cloth and padding," I told him, making it clear I wasn't some foolish child.
"It is," he agreed. "It still works. Maybe it's not magical or divine, but for me, having something of my own that I can cling to? It feels like an anchor sometimes. They're good at smothering squeals of excitement and they soak up tears too."
"Droz, did you cry into your stuffed animal?" Lessa teased.
"A lot," he admitted. "I also told mine all about the pretty green guy I couldn't stop thinking about.
" And he looked over at Omden to make his point.
"And Gorzo is in my closet. He's a dog, Meri.
I kept him because he feels like he holds all these memories I don't want to give up.
Now, you have a little sparrow for yourself. "
"Is this really what a sparrow looks like?" I asked, pulling the thing closer.
"Close enough," he said. "It's like a child's drawing of what one looks like. And maybe when I get back, I can show you one, hm?"
"And you are coming back?" I asked.
He pressed his massive hand over where mine rested on the bird. The feel of his skin was rough and calloused, but gentle. His presence was slightly overwhelming. And yet, something about the gentle way he was talking to me made this feel special, like it meant more than mere reassurance.
"The damage has already been done," he explained softly. "I'm just going to help people. Omden and I will be back as soon as we can."
"Okay," I agreed.
"And," Omden said, "I'll make sure he doesn't do anything too stupid while he's out there."
"Or you!" I insisted - but paused. "Is Ayla going too?"
"Her entire house," Drozel confirmed. "Why?"
"Did you want to send her a message?" Lessa asked. "Drozel and Ommy can take it for you. They'll travel together."
I chewed on my lip for a moment. "No. Just tell her to be safe? Maybe? Something that sounds good, okay? And make sure she doesn't get hurt?"
"Promise," Drozel said.
And those green eyes of his were so close. The way they were watching me was gentle, nothing like Gideon's. It wasn't even the color that felt so different. It was the way he was watching me, like he was honestly listening - and caring about - what I said.
"You don't understand," I insisted. "Ayla's so mad about what they did to us.
She also never takes care of herself first. Even down there, she always tried to make them hit her instead of us.
She took the blame when she didn't do anything wrong just so Callah and I wouldn't get punished. This? It's the same thing!"
"What do you mean?" Omden asked, moving closer so he could steal the chair Drozel had left.
"I'm saying Ayla's going because she wants to hurt the Moles!
" How could they not see that? "She probably knows something I don't, because she paid attention to those things.
I just wanted to be a good wife, but Ayla?
She wanted something else. We didn't even have a word for it, but she climbed into her forbidden library because of it.
She studied things, and learned things, and had to know it all because she thought that would change things. "
"And it did," Lessa pointed out.
"No, breaking the commandments did," I countered.
But Drozel murmured like he didn't agree.
"She was hung out on that tree, but Ayla got her chain off the hook.
She ran, Meri. She was going to escape - or die trying.
While we brought her back, she listened, watched, and paid attention to all the things we did.
Then she learned our language, figured out why we couldn't predict the next attack, and used all her knowledge to change things. "
"Oh."
He nodded. "And you use all your knowledge to help others," he said.
"So don't go thinking her way is better than yours.
Your way saved Kanik's life - and how many others?
Lives, Meri." And he lifted his hand to smooth my hair back.
"I know you haven't been told it enough, but you are just as good as her.
Different, but neither better nor worse. "
I liked that. From the hand on my head to the way he'd immediately understood what I was thinking, it felt nice. It made me feel seen. Lessa listened, and Omden always helped, but Drozel? He had this way of simply understanding me - even before I did myself.
"Please don't get hurt?" I asked, lifting my head to meet his eyes again.
And he smiled. "Can't promise that, but Omden's good at keeping me alive."
"Not always easy, love," Omden told him. "But we'll be fine, Meri. And if we're not, you'll be fine, okay? The Moles should be gone. The Reapers are recovering, and as sad as it is, Dragons have done this enough times that we're good at it."
"But it doesn't feel right," I explained.
And the men shared a look.
"What?" Lessa demanded.
It was Omden who answered. "Ayla said the same thing."
"Well, shit," Lessa grumbled. "You two had better come back alive. If you don't, I'll kill you myself."
Drozel turned to face her. "Oh, and we wouldn't want that, right?" Then he dragged the back of his finger down her cheek. "I also think you should stay the night."
"If Meri's okay with it," Omden added. Then to me, "She'll be sleeping with us."
"Oh." Then I nodded. "Okay."
And yet, I was curious how that worked. Did he just mean to sleep? Because that wasn't how Lessa used that term. I had a feeling it wasn't how they did either. I also knew what I'd be thinking about for the rest of the night.