Chapter 3 #2
Archer
Back to the important question. Why do you have an ice pack on your head?
Axel
Inquiring minds want to know.
She was shoveling the driveway in the most ridiculous heeled boots, and I tried to help her after she dropped the shovel. She decided to pick up the shovel by stepping on the scooper, and the handle would have knocked her ass out.
Clark
So you headbutted her?
Easton
That’s a very gentlemanly thing to do.
Fuck off, Lugnuts. I moved her out of the way, and the shovel hit me in the side of the head.
Clark
So this is really Janson’s girlfriend’s fault.
Bridger
Why would anyone step on a shovel versus picking it up?
I didn’t ask when the metal handle was aiming for her face.
Easton
You are one chivalrous bastard.
Archer
Death by shovel is no way to go.
Tell me about it. I took a good shot to the head.
Clark
I’ve taken many shots to the head on the ice. Try a cold beer with that ice pack.
Axel
Sounds like Henley’s bestie has it out for you.
Clark
He’s not used to women hating him.
Bridger
Maybe you should ice your ego.
I may have a concussion, but by all means, take this moment to shit on me.
Easton
Someone is feeling very sensitive.
Bridger
He hasn’t been laid in a while.
How the fuck would you know?
Bridger
Because you’re always a moody prick when you go more than a few weeks.
He was right, but I wouldn’t tell him that. I hadn’t been out much because I’d been buried at work.
Easton
Your fake girlfriend doesn’t put out?
Don’t you worry about me or my fake girlfriend. We’re doing just fine over here.
Clark
Answer your door, assmunch. I came to check on you. We can order dinner.
Axel
Beware of any random shovels coming for your head, Clark.
Easton
Remember, someone is living in the main house. So if you two fuckers have a bunch of beers, do not wander over there. If you do, prepare to be punched in the throat.
Archer
My money is on Henley’s friend. Sounds like she takes no shit.
Axel
Wait. Is she hot?
I pulled the door open, and Clark walked in, holding up his phone.
“They want to know if Henley’s friend is hot?”
I groaned. “Yes. The heathen is hot.”
Clark
He said the heathen is hot.
I’m sitting next to you. You didn’t need to type that. I could have answered.
Easton
The heathen is named Lulu. Consider her off-limits to all of you fuckers. But yes…she takes no shit. Don’t mess with her.
No problem. I barely know her, and she’s caused me physical pain the two times that I’ve seen her.
Axel
Color me intrigued.
Clark laughed as I dropped my phone and finished my beer.
My head had finally stopped pounding.
There was a knock on the door, and I pushed to my feet as Clark scrolled through the TV channels.
Lulu Sonnet was on the other side of the door when I pulled it open.
I narrowed my gaze. “Did you come to murder me, Wildcat? Because if you did, my brother is here, so there’s a witness.”
“Such a sensitive little flower,” she said with a chuckle as Clark hurried over to the door to check her out.
“Hey, I’m Clark Chadwick. Would you like to come inside?” he said.
“You don’t even fucking live here,” I hissed.
“Neither do you. It’s Easton’s house.”
“Hey.” She snapped her fingers in front of us. “I’m not coming in. I was just unpacking my supplies to work on some designs, but I found some malachite and thought you might want to keep it nearby.”
She handed me a green stone, and I studied it. “Is it poison? Do you want me to eat it?”
“You don’t eat it, Rafael.” She shook her head with disbelief. “These stones are a good form of protection. You know, because you’re so accident-prone.”
“Accident-prone? You throat punching me was not an accident. Nor was the fact that you stepped on a shovel and nearly killed me.”
“You broke into the home I was staying in and then you dove in front of the shovel. You fell on top of me. You could have crushed me. So trust me, this is as much for my protection as yours. I can’t have a walking disaster living in my backyard and not be concerned for my safety.”
Clark was hysterically laughing now, and Lulu’s lips turned up in the corners.
“I like this girl,” my brother said, and I glared at him before turning my attention back to her.
“Does it ward off evil spirits?” I asked, quirking a brow as her gaze locked with mine.
“Are all the Chad-dicks this dramatic?” She smirked before turning on her heels and walking toward her house.
“Nice to meet you!” Clark shouted, and she held a hand over her head and waved.
I punched him in the stomach before slamming the door. “She just called you a Chad-dick, you dumbfuck. Do not flirt with the devil.”
“My dick is not offended by the nickname. And she’s fucking hot.”
“Yeah. Spend a few minutes with her and see if you’re still standing after.”
He barked out a laugh, and I glanced out the window toward the main house across the yard. She was standing in the kitchen, and I hated that I couldn’t stop staring.
She was fucking hot.
And that pissed me off.