Chapter Twelve – Oliver
OLIVER
From Bad to Worse
“ S top laughing.”
Rose’s shoulders trembled. “I—I’m trying.”
“Try harder,” I grumbled, pulling the ring on one of the cans of beer we’d bought not long ago. “I have to admit that this isn’t what I was expecting when you said you’d buy me a drink.”
She finally turned her head towards me, peeking at me with her hazel eyes from between her fingers. “Well, I wasn’t about to walk into the pub with my mortal enemy, was I?”
“Oh, but taking me to a nursery to be verbally abused by a five-year-old is perfectly acceptable in your book?”
“I thought it’d make a nice change from me being the one verbally abusing you.”
I stared at her when she opened her can of wine spritzer.
Who knew wine came in cans? Not me, that was for sure.
You really did learn something new every day.
“Still, you could have helped me,” I said. “I’m assuming that kid’s mother is one of your fellow allotmenteers.”
“Mm, as of February,” Rose replied, leaning back on one hand.
“So, she’s extra pissed. She’s been waiting for two years to get a plot, spent a shit ton of money and time getting the plot to how she wants it, and some hotshot city boy has rolled into town with pound signs in his eyes, ripping away everything she’s worked so hard for without a second thought.
Can’t say I blame her for calling you a rotten bastard in front of her five-year-old, to be honest. I’d have called you much worse. ”
I clutched my chest, leaning against the side of the van. “Haven’t I suffered enough today?”
“If you think today was suffering, you’re in for a rough ride.”
“I knew your silence over the last week was something to be afraid of.”
“Ah, so you are intelligent. Perhaps you’re more worthy an opponent than I thought.” She looked over at me and grinned. Her eyes sparkled brighter than they had any right to, and something tickled in my chest at how luminous her smile was.
I held her gaze for a moment before shaking my head in disbelief. “You know, if you smile at me like that, I might get the wrong idea.”
“Me? Smile? At you? You’re mistaken, sir.”
“Tell your mouth that.”
She knocked her foot into mine and turned away. “Don’t get cocky. Just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean it’s at you specifically. I smile at people I don’t like all the time. It’s part of my job.”
“Sure, keep telling yourself that.” I kicked her back, although with a lot less power than she’d hit me with. “Should I free up my weekend for you, Miss Rose?”
She shuddered. “Don’t call me that. Only cute little babies with snotty noses and sticky fingers can call me that.”
“Duly noted. Guess I’ll get a cold and dip my fingers in honey, then.”
“You can do that all you like, but it doesn’t fix the ‘cute’ part of my requirements.”
“You’ve got an answer for everything.” I sighed. “This weekend, then?”
“No, don’t free up your weekend. I have plans this weekend, so I don’t have the time to cater to you,” she said. “You have my permission to do as you please with your time.”
“Oh, how very gracious of you. What if I want to hang out with you like we’re doing right now?”
“Then I advise you get your head checked, because your screws aren’t just loose, they’ve popped out entirely,” she said dryly, shooting me a dark look. She held it for a moment before swigging her wine and looking away. “Thank you.”
Did she just… thank … me?
“Say that again. I think I misheard you.”
“Don’t ruin it.” She once again knocked her foot into mine. “I may dislike you and everything you’re doing, but I can still thank someone for their help. You did help today.”
I eyed her. “Was that me carrying everything for you or amusing you by getting verbally abused by a five-year-old?”
Rose laughed into her hand. “Bit of both, actually. There’s nothing quite like a five-year-old with a lisp calling someone a ‘wotten bastard,’ is there?”
“I would have preferred if he’d stuck to my name, or even ‘mister, mister,’ if I’m honest.”
“Hey, on the bright side, Ryan thought you couldn’t possibly be the duke because you were nice to him. Keep this up, and in twenty years, you’ll finally have the adults of Hanbury on your side.”
I chuckled under my breath and looked away, unable to fight the subtle twitch of my lips into a smile. She really did have an answer for absolutely everything. I’d never met anyone so hard to argue with in my life, yet I didn’t hate it.
There was something oddly charming about the way she hated me.
Shit.
I really did need to go back to London if I was thinking like that.
I was losing my fucking mind—and if not right now, I was most definitely on the verge of it.
“Then I shall begin my stealth takeover,” I replied, sipping my beer. “One by one, I’ll convince the young people of Hanbury to take my side and wage war on the old guard.”
“A flawless plan, sir,” Rose replied flatly. “It can’t possibly go wrong.”
“I take that as praise, given how much of a plotter you are.”
“You do that.” She glanced at me. “Please, please do that.”
I stared at the side of her head for a moment before looking away with a chuckle. “You don’t have much of a poker face, do you?”
“Actually, I have a fantastic poker face,” she replied. “That’s what makes me so formidable.”
“Can you play poker?”
“Why would I play poker? Monopoly is stressful enough without adding real money into the equation with something as unpredictable as poker.” She set her can down and stretched her arms out, then pulled her hands back and cracked her fingers one by one. “Ah, that feels good.”
I was about to reply when my phone rang in my pocket. I handed Rose my beer can and pulled out the phone to see Luke’s name on the screen. “Hi,” I answered. “Why are you calling?”
“Where are you?” he demanded.
“Why?”
“Because I want to know.”
“Why?”
“It’s a matter of urgency.”
“Then be urgent in your explanation, Lucas.”
Rose wrinkled her nose up. “Ugh, is that the snoop?”
Luke gasped, making the line crackle in my ear. “Are you with that woman?”
“If you’re calling to come and get me, I’m in Rock Park. Rose’s van is near the entrance to the secondary school,” I explained. “If my absence is not the emergency, go and find a hobby to fill the rest of your evening, Luke.”
“I had plenty of hobbies until you dragged me to the middle of nowhere,” he grumbled. “I’m not far. I’ll be right there.”
Beep .
I stared at my phone.
Rose leant over, bumping her shoulder into mine. “Bit of a moody git, isn’t he?”
“Mm, but it’s reasonable,” I replied. “Unlike me, he’s never lived anywhere like this. I don’t think he was truly prepared for the difference in lifestyle between a major city and small, rural village.”
“Is anyone?”
“Huh?”
“Well, it’s a thing, isn’t it? Living in a place like Hanbury isn’t for everyone,” she said.
“We’re twenty miles from the nearest major supermarket, if it can even be called that.
Our shops are either small, locally owned places or little corporate stores that are wildly overpriced to take advantage of us.
Regular bus services outside of the school buses are a luxury, and trains are so extortionately expensive in general.
Emergency services are miles away, there’s no such thing as A&E or even a minor injuries unit unless you drive for at least twenty minutes, and places like cinemas or theatres are almost non-existent. ”
“Wow. You’re really selling the rural life here.”
Rose laughed, throwing her head back in what was perhaps the deepest, most genuine thing I’d ever heard her express.
“I’m just saying that I get it. This isn’t for everyone, and I don’t begrudge those who feel that way.
It’s gotta be pretty tough to go from everything at your fingertips to next to nothing.
I have to travel sometimes, and I’m overwhelmed even in bigger towns.
I can’t imagine being somewhere like London where everything and its creator is within touching difference.
We’re products of our environments, and changing them is overwhelming, no matter the direction of change. ”
I rubbed my hand over my mouth and looked away from her. If I ever heard that laugh again, there was a good chance I’d lose my mind completely.
Who was this woman, really? She was surely some kind of supernatural being to be bewitching me like this.
Since when had I ever given a shit about the way someone’s laugh sounded?
Since Rose Bloody Matthews, apparently.
The single-track road in front of us was illuminated by car headlights, and we both turned our attention in that direction. I winced as the light glanced across my eyes, but Luke’s car was easily recognisable as he pulled up.
“Is that the snoop?” Rose asked, pointing at his car.
“That’s my assistant, yes,” I replied.
“So, the snoop.”
“Your words, not mine.”
“I don’t hear you denying them,” she shot back.
“Hello, Mr Snoop! We finally meet in person! I know for a fact I don’t need to introduce myself to you, since you probably know everything about me down to my bra size, so I won’t bother.
I won’t ask for your forgiveness, either, because I don’t flippin’ care for it. ”
She grinned as if her smile alone could get her out of jail.
Maybe it could.
Her best friend was a police officer, after all.
“Rest assured I know nothing about your personal measurements, nor do I want to.” Luke slammed his car door shut and glared at her. “My name is not Mr Snoop, it’s Luke. Mr Butler, to you, Miss Matthews.”
“The only people I refer to like that are my old teachers, my clients, and people I like. As a half-baked Sherlock Holmes, you fall into none of those categories.” She smiled as she crumpled up her empty can of wine, then hopped out of the back of the van.
“With that said, Luke, I return your wayward fancypants boss to you before you think I’m so crazy that I’ve kidnapped him. ”
“Well, you do dislike him greatly,” Luke replied. “So, if he goes missing, don’t blame me if you’re my number one suspect, Rose .”
“Ha.”
“Ha? What’s ‘ha?’”