Chapter Fifteen
Cole Williams [off-screen]: What can you tell us about how the Howard trade went down?
Phil Easton: Less than you’d think. It all happened very fast, and it was brokered by the team’s GMs. Susannah Lindholm, our head coach, only found out a few hours before we put Howie on a plane.
Cole Williams: Was the morality clause part of the reasoning for the trade?
Phil Easton: [long pause] A morality clause is a weird thing to mention in this context, don’t you think?
I mean, it’s wild that professional sports put those in contracts anyway.
Teams have the power to tell an adult how to speak and act in public because they work for a trademark.
In a very real way, they’re using a contract to impinge on another human being’s rights.
Howie got drafted by the Sea Lions at eighteen.
That’s young to sign a contract anyway, but the Sea Lions also get to decide when he’s behaving “immorally?” Yikes.
And what’s especially concerning is how the clause gets brought up in a situation like this, when a player has been outed against his will, but not when players refuse to participate in team events such as Pride Nights for political reasons.
Cole Williams: So, the trade…
Phil Easton: As far as I’m aware, the morality clause has nothing to do with why Howie was traded, as Lindy has told you multiple times.
Trades are tough on everyone involved, especially midseason.
There’s very little warning before we uproot a player’s life.
Part of my goal as a coach is to give players more say in their own futures with the team, be that in contract negotiations or trade deals.
In Howie’s case, I couldn’t make it easier on him, and I’m sorry for it.
But nothing about it was a question of morality.
Top comments:
sealions4lyfe: jfc are we ever going to get hockey content from the sea lions or is it all just going to be debunking the trade rumors about howie forever?
hockeyfanofcolor88: Easton has some really interesting things to say about how teams essentially own their players. Powerful for a Black player to be mentioning it.
clions2010: @hockeyfanofcolor88—lol get outta here with your critical race theory this is america. no one wants a gay dude in the locker room, of course he got traded.
hockeyfanofcolor88: @clions2010—please go outside and touch grass.
(From Sea Lions postpractice media, 12/26/2025)
When the call connected, all Kilian could see was Breezy’s chin.
“Howie! Oh my God, Howie!”
“Dude, I can’t see your face,” Kilian complained. He’d gone to the effort of propping up his phone against the vase of dried flowers Damir kept on the coffee table because he was a secret homemaker disguised as a giant hockey player.
“Wait a second.” Rustling on Breezy’s end followed, then darkness, and finally, Kilian could see Breezy’s strong jaw, his cleft chin, his bright eyes, and his happy smile. “Oh my God, I’ve missed you so much!”
“Yeah,” Kilian choked out. “Yeah, I’ve missed you, too, man.”
The Chicago guys were great. Kilian had the sneaking suspicion he would end up feeling more at home here than he ever had in San Francisco. But Breezy was his first real grown-up friend, and looking at it now, Kilian had treated him like shit.
“I’m so sorry, dude.”
Breezy quickly shook his head. “No, Howie, don’t start. You’re gonna make me cry, and I already cried about your Insta post today. Luca will never stop making fun of me.”
Kilian laughed, brittle with how well he could imagine the precise scene he would no longer be seeing.
“Sorry, but you gotta let me say it. I shouldn’t have been such a baby about…
y’know, everything that happened on Halloween.
You were doing your best to be there for everyone, and I wanted you to be there only for me, you know? But that was dumb and selfish.”
Sniffling, Breezy made a heart out of his thumbs and pointer fingers. “I did want to be there for you. And I wish I had done more. After you came out to me, I should have checked in and, like, gone out with you so no skeevy dudes could take pictures of you.”
Kilian rolled his eyes. “I’m not your responsibility. My shitty decisions are not your fault.”
“You’re my friend. Of course you’re my responsibility. I want you to be my responsibility.”
“Oh my God, has Tom started grooming you to be captain when he retires?”
Breezy physically recoiled. “Ew. No. What. I’m a part-time alternate, remember? I just do the home games. I’m not captain material.”
Shaking his head, Kilian ignored Breezy. No way he wouldn’t end up the Sea Lions’ captain in due time. It was him or Jax, and Jax had never looked at a responsibility and thought, “I want that in my life.”
“Anyway, we’re not talking about me.” Breezy leveled Kilian with his most earnest look. “We’re talking about how proud I am of you and how amazing you are.”
“Breezy—”
“What you wrote is awesome, bro. And inspiring and shit.”
“I mean, I had to say something, right?”
Breezy’s mouth tugged downward. “I guess. Starling has been permanently banned from Sea Lions games, by the way. They had to find a new beat reporter because no one will talk to her.”
“Good.” Kilian thought of the missed calls from her.
Three of them. And she hadn’t texted again to explain why she wanted to get in touch either.
Might be old-fashioned of him, but if he hadn’t heard back from someone after three missed calls, he would consider shooting them a text before outing them in the news.
“And, um. We’ve been…well. Look, can I go get the guys?”
Kilian peered into the background of the screen. He made out weights and a rowing machine, which meant Breezy’s chair wasn’t a chair at all but a bench. He couldn’t be at his and Luca’s apartment since they didn’t have a home gym. “Uh, yeah, I guess. Are they with you?”
“Yeah, we’re doing Christmas Eve at Phil’s this year and Christmas Day at the shelter.”
“Aw.” A pang of longing for his old team hit Kilian once again. “How’s Jayden doing?”
A wide grin split across Breezy’s face. “Great! He aced his French test after I helped him study.”
“Nice!”
It was cheating since Breezy grew up in Montreal and spoke fluent French, but whatever.
“Anyway, let me get everyone together,” Breezy said.
Kilian got an up-close view of the floorboards in Phil’s house as Breezy walked out to the living room, and then there were faces upon faces crowding into the screen and too many voices speaking over one another.
“Howie!” Jax called. Only the top of his bleach-blond head was visible. “You’re my hero, you know that?”
“Shut up.” Kilian laughed.
“No, I’m fucking serious. You are officially too mature to be a rookie.”
“Aw.” Kilian pressed his hand to his heart. “I love you too. Who all is there?”
Breezy picked up the phone again and panned it around, showing him Luca, sitting beside Breezy as always; Tom, who smiled with his whole face for once; Phil, leaning over the back of the couch with his elbows propped on the cushions; Dmitriyev, holding a bottle of something strong in his hand; Hayes, looking long-suffering with his wife beside him; and a half-dozen other guys strewn about the living room.
“So, the Sea Lions are very thankful you went on record saying you weren’t traded because we’re all homophobes,” Phil said when Howie had greeted everyone. “But I think a couple guys were wondering if you’d be okay with us following your example.”
“My example?” Kilian asked blankly. “What, you wanna know what clubs to hit up in the Castro, where no one knows shit about hockey? Gonna be honest, I think I fucked that up.”
Jax broke into loud peals of laughter.
“No, not exactly.” Phil’s tone of voice was one he’d never used before his knee got injured and he transitioned to coaching.
Kilian hadn’t expected to hear it again now that Phil didn’t have to coach him anymore.
“If some Sea Lions released their own coming-out statements, would it be okay with you? It’s your moment. ”
“God, please. Take the heat off me. My phone is a time bomb right now. I can’t even look at it.”
“Awesome.” Jax pushed into frame to flop against Tom. He pulled out his own phone and began typing before tilting the screen at Tom, who nodded.
“Seriously?” Kilian asked. “Right now? It was all hush-hush for so long.”
“We’ve been thinking about it for a long time,” Tom said. “The team knows anyway, and we left you alone for long enough.”
He wanted to protest, to tell Tom he didn’t have to do this, but emotion choked his throat, and then Jax was saying “Done!” brightly and tossing his phone aside.
“I will wait until I can piss someone off by coming out,” Luca told him.
If Breezy’s phone hadn’t been so close to him and Luca, Kilian would have missed how Luca looked immediately to Breezy, sitting beside him on the couch.
Most everyone surrounding them did miss it, checking their own phones and laughing at whatever Jax had posted.
Kilian himself nearly didn’t spot Breezy looking back at Luca, soft and open and fond as ever.
Interesting.
Kilian would have to ask what was going on there later.
Phil cleared his throat. “We don’t want to keep you from your Christmas, Howie.”
Kilian shrugged. “No big plans. I think Damir—Denisov, I mean, is making dinner for us.”
“Sounds…nice?”
“He’s nice.”
Breezy shot him a wink. Good to know he still kept what remained of Kilian’s secrets.
“I should probably go see if he needs help,” Kilian said. “But it was great to talk to you guys.”
“You too!” That was Jax, smiling maniacally. Kilian had to check his socials to see what he’d done.
“Call anytime!” Breezy sounded so earnest about it.
“I will,” Kilian promised.
“We will destroy you on New Year’s.”
Kilian groaned. “Never change, Luca.”
“We’re so proud of you, Kilian,” Tom said.
Kilian abruptly lost the ability to answer. He should be over it, but hearing those words from Tom hit different. He nodded, smiled, and ended the call.