13. Nice
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
NICE
Payne
Nineteen years ago
“Why are you hitting me like I’m the enemy?
” Dean puts his hands to my chest and shoves as best he can.
I’ve got five inches and at least fifteen pounds on him.
But that doesn’t keep him from wanting to beat my ass into the ground.
I don’t blame him. I’ve been using him and every other offensive lineman as my punching bags.
“It’s called football,” I bite
He rips his helmet off, throws it to the ground, and pounds his chest plates twice. “Friend, not foe. Got it? Save it for the game tomorrow, dickhead.”
I rip my own helmet off but don’t throw it to the ground like Dean. I do it because I see her. I look past him to Ruby, who’s walking out the front doors of the middle school with a group of girls and guys.
More guys than girls to be exact.
One in particular that pisses me off.
Dean turns to see what I’m looking at. “Is that why I took a beating at practice today?”
I can’t tear my eyes away from her. “You took a beating because it’s football. If you don’t like it, join the school play.”
Dean barks a laugh. “By the look on your face, I’d say you want to take out the entire play cast too.”
“Only one,” I mutter.
Dean picks up his helmet. “I might stick around to see this. Your dad’ll be the one kicking your ass if you get suspended and miss the game this week.”
Dean is right. My dad will lose his shit if I do anything to fuck up my time on the field. That includes going easy at practice.
I pick up my backpack from the sideline and stalk past my friend to go to my best friend and figure out what she’s doing. No one knows her better than I do, and even I can’t figure it out. “Don’t stick around. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Good luck. You’ll need it,” Dean calls after me.
I’m halfway to what I call the thespian nerd club led by their president, Ruby—I’m in a fucking mood—Sinclair. She looks over at Hollis, laughs, and smiles like she hasn’t smiled at me in over a week, which has put me in a shitty mood. Though I’m not about to admit that to anyone.
Hollis tries to put his arm around her shoulders, which is as awkward as the pimples on his face since he’s two inches shorter than her.
“Hey!” I yell and pick my pace up to a jog.
Ruby turns, and Hollis looks like a jumpy bunny when he sees me.
That’s right, Hollis. Take your boney fingers off my best friend.
Ruby rolls her eyes. At least I know which Ruby I’m dealing with. “What do you want?”
I’m sweaty, covered in grass stains, and am riper than the boys’ locker room, but I don’t care. I ignore the thespian followers and speak to their fearless leader. “I’ll walk you home.”
She shrugs her backpack up one shoulder and puts her other hand on her hip. “I don’t need anyone to walk me home.”
“B-but, I was going to walk you home,” Hollis stutters. We’ve been in school together since kindergarten—I know he does not have a stutter. Yeah, Hollis is on edge. He knows he’s stepping into my territory.
We’re in all honors classes together. If anyone in this school is vying with me for the top grade point average, it’s Hollis.
Not only does he like drama club, but the teachers salivate over him during speeches and presentations.
I used to think he was cool, but not anymore now that he’s vying for the spot I want to be in with Ruby.
What I wouldn’t give to pummel him at football practice.
The entire drama club scatters other than him. Ruby sighs. “Hollis is going to walk me home.”
“We need to talk.” That’s not a lie. I want to know why she’s given me the cold shoulder for the last week and a half. “Then we can do homework.”
Her upper lip twists into a scowl. “But you haven’t showered. You stink.”
“I’ll shower at your house. I’ve done it a million times.” I smile wide. Take that, Hollis. He only wishes he could be naked in Ruby’s shower and using Ruby’s shampoo that smells like strawberries so he can smell like her for the rest of the day.
Hollis, my new nemesis, turns to Ruby. “Maybe another time. I’ll see you tomorrow at rehearsal.”
Ruby tries to reach out for him but misses. “Wait. We were in the middle of talking about the dance next week.”
That’s what this is about. I had a feeling.
The eighth grade Sadie Hawkins Fall dance. Lame. Who makes an entire event where the girls have to ask the guys? First of all, a school dance is lame, but putting rules on who can ask whom?
I’ve been asked by eleven girls, and I turned every single one down. Two of them cried, and one of the criers begged me to just think on it. It was annoying as hell, and I had to euro step her into the boy’s bathroom to get away. I’ve been ducking and weaving her ever since.
If Ruby doesn’t get her shit together soon, I’ll be forced to keep breaking hearts across Winslet. It will be no one’s fault but her own.
Hollis hums as he speaks. “Hmmm, that’s okay. See you tomorrow. Um ... you, too, Payne.”
My smile widens. “Good luck on the honors lit test. We’ll see who sets the curve.”
Hollis grumbles under his breath as he wanders off looking like a rejected puppy.
I barely feel it when Ruby puts a hand to my chest and tries to give me a shove. I don’t budge. “Why did you do that?”
I shrug a shoulder. “You were about to ask him to the dance. I’m keeping you from making a huge mistake.”
“Hollis is nice. There’s no mistake to be made.”
I motion to myself up and down. “I can be nice.”
She drops her backpack to the ground and stomps her foot on the cracked sidewalk. “What you just did was not at all nice, Payne. Not a single, tiny bit of niceness. In fact, I’m going to tell your mother.”
“You really think my mom will care if I am being nice? I’m shocked you think that’s any kind of threat.”
“True.” She shakes her head before a sly smile takes over her face with a bright idea. “Fine. I’ll tell Grandma.”
“Don’t you dare.” My stomach drops. If she knows anything, it’s that I care what Ms. Sinclair thinks about me more than my own parents.
She smiles smugly. “I might, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”
I bend to pick up her backpack and sling it over my shoulder with mine before I turn toward her house.
She finally gets with the program and has to double-time it to catch up with me.
“You won’t tell your grandma because you don’t want her to think badly of me. Because deep down, you know I’m nice.”
She finally falls in beside me and we turn to walk down the treelined street. Ruby lives in town and can walk anywhere she wants. Mom usually sends her driver for me after practice when I call that I’m ready. “Then you need to be nice to my friends. I’m nice to your friends.”
I throw her a glance. “My friends are cool.”
“And this is why you’re not nice,” she mutters.
“Hollis can’t be fun—not as fun as me. Do you really want to waste your eighth-grade Sadie Hawkins experience on someone who only talks about the Pythagorean theorem or photosynthesis? Why do that to yourself, Ruby? You’re only in the eighth grade once. I doubt he can even dance.”
“Hollis talks about other things too. And he might be able to dance ... we don’t know that.”
“Look at him, Rubes. He’s only in the drama club to work on sets. He’s not even an extra. I mean, maybe he could pull off being a tree or something, but that’s a stretch.”
She contemplates the facts I lay before her.
“He tripped over his own feet walking into honors history class last week. I’m afraid for you if you try to dance with him. If anything, this is me looking out for you. I don’t want you to get hurt.”
I feel her rolling her eyes without even looking. But she doesn’t argue, so I might be getting somewhere.
“What do you suggest I do then, Mister Smarty Pants?”
I stop, grab her hand, and pull her behind a shrub that’s so big, it might be older than us. Ruby and I are so comfortable around each other, she doesn’t blink at me holding her hand, so I drop our bags and my helmet and don’t let go. “Ask me.”
Her brows shoot up. “You want me to ask you to the dance?”
My heart beats double time under my smelly football pads. “Yes. Ask me.”
“Why? So you can pull my hair, tell me no, and then laugh at me?”
I shake my head. “That’s not fair. I haven’t pulled your hair for at least three years—maybe four. And I promise, I will not laugh at you.”
She licks her lips and swallows hard. “I don’t believe you.”
I’m desperate enough to beg. “Try me.”
“Why?” Her tone drops to almost a whisper, even though there’s no one around and we’re hidden behind a wall of shrubs.
I pull her closer to me. We’re almost touching toe to toe, chest to chest, her boobs to my football pads. “Because if you take anyone else but me to that dance, I’ll go crazy.”
I feel her nervous breath exhale against my chin. I’m taller than her by at least six inches. She’s always been smaller, but I’ve put on height in the last year.
She finally gives in. “Okay. But on one condition.”
“Name it.” She knows I’ll do anything for her. I’ve proven it in the past over and over. I even got suspended two years ago for punching Adam Foster out cold when he made fun of her when she got her period on the school bus before she realized what happened.
“You have to try out for the spring musical with me. And you can’t make a mockery of yourself. You have to really try.”
“Done.” I’ll never live that down. But when a guy is desperate, he’s apparently willing to sing and dance and be a try-hard while doing it.
A smile touches every beautiful feature of her face. “Payne Deacon, will you go to the dance with me?”
I struggle to breathe, but I force myself to inhale so I don’t pass out and crush her to death. Then I do what I’ve wanted to do for the last fourteen months but didn’t have the balls to try.
I lean down and put my lips on hers.
I’ve never kissed anyone but neither has she. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me sane.
Her blue eyes are huge, staring up at me, but I power through. I’m no idiot. I researched how to kiss a girl. I put my hands on her cheeks, hold her to me, and hope it doesn’t suck for her.
She doesn’t kick me in the shin or push me away. She clenches my dirty practice jersey in her fingers and lifts up on her toes.
I moan.
I didn’t learn that on the internet. It just happened. I hope it isn’t weird, but I can’t help it. I’m finally kissing my best friend who’s about to be upgraded.
When a car drives by and honks, we both pull away, but I don’t let go of her face. We’re both breathing hard. Not going with the tongue was a game-time decision. I haven’t brushed my teeth since this morning.
When I don’t say anything, her brows pinch. “Payne—”
“Yes, I’ll go to the dance with you.” I spit the words out so fast I can barely keep up with myself. “And you’re my girlfriend now.”
Her eyes flare.
Shit.
“I mean, will you be my girlfriend? I promise, I’ll kiss you better next time.”
A smile spreads across her pretty face. I’m afraid my heart might explode out of my football pads.
“Yes.”
“Yes,” I echo, because I sort of can’t believe it. I thought there was a chance she’d kick me in the shin. “I mean, cool. Cool-cool.”
She shocks me and surges up. Her lips hit mine with a force, but her kiss is quick and loud, ending with a smack. “It took you long enough to ask.”
My eyes widen this time. “What?”
“I’ve been waiting for, like, ever.”
I puff my chest out with pride, because she’s as into me as I am her. I hardly remember a time when she wasn’t front and center in my existence.
“Cool.” Fuck, I am lame. I need a new word.
“Let’s go home so I can tell Grandma and Mom.”
I fall in beside her when she starts down the sidewalk again and take the chance to do something I’ve been wanting to do for years. I grab her hand and don’t let go.
I’m holding Ruby’s hand, and it means something it never has before.
Ruby looks from our hands up to me. I’ve seen every emotion on this girl, but I’ve never seen this one.
When we get to her door, it’s unlocked like usual after school. She calls for her family as she pushes through.
“Mom, Grandma! Guess what?” She’s barely into the house when I almost run her over because she stops with no warning.
Her grandma is sitting in the corner rocking Ruby’s new baby brother. He was born about six months ago, but he has a different dad than Ruby. Blake is asleep, but Ms. Sinclair looks like she’s been crying. Her face is swollen, her eyes are red, and everything on her is puffy.
Ruby gasps. “What’s wrong?”
Ms. Sinclair sniffles and bounces Ruby’s brother in her arms. “I don’t know how else to tell you this, Ruby, so I’m just going to say it. Your mama and Buck left.”
I hold onto Ruby’s hand tighter. Buck is Bess’s boyfriend and Blake’s dad.
Ruby is confused. “What do you mean they left? Where’d they go?”
Ms. Sinclair shakes her head and tears stream down her face.
“I don’t have the energy to sugarcoat it, child.
When I got home from work after lunch, Blake was alone and crying in his bed.
There was a note saying she and Buck were done.
They want their freedom to live their lives.
They left. They left you and baby Blake and me.
I don’t think they’re coming back. I don’t know what to do, Ruby. I have no idea what to do.”
Ruby turns around and throws herself into my padded chest.
And she bursts into tears.