Chapter 8
Chapter Eight
CALDWELL
The hurt in her eyes hits my center mass, like a hot knife wedging itself deep inside of me, taking my breath away momentarily. Not only because of the impact but also the reality of how fast she has become the center of my world.
Sure, I knew she was the one. It was a sense I had from the very start.
Fate put me on that plane with her, but the sensation of what it would feel like to lose her and hurt her only brings it home all the more.
I have to come clean; it’s the only way.
It was stupid of me to hide it. Starting off on a lie is never good.
“Cordelia is nobody,” I say, my voice rougher than I intend.
I need her to understand; I need her to see that whatever she read on that phone screen means nothing.
I’ll start there because I know I would have lost my ever-loving mind if this were flipped.
I’m still reeling from my reaction to the room service guy.
“A family friend. My mother arranged it. I was supposed to take her to the wedding.”
Mable’s robe has fallen open again; one shoulder has completely slipped off, but I force my eyes to stay on her face, hating the doubt clouding those green eyes I can’t stop thinking about. Even when I close my eyes, they are there. I step closer, needing to touch her.
“She means nothing to me. A family friend my mother wanted me to take to the wedding.”
“Well, we don’t want to disappoint your mommy now, do we?” She places her hand on her hips, and if I weren’t panicking inside, I’d smile at her pushback, knowing it’s not typical of who she is but that she’s mad enough or comfortable enough to do so. That means something.
Fuck me, though. She’s not wrong. I went along with it because it was easy and wouldn’t hurt anything, but how very wrong I’d been in that train of thought.
I’m usually good at looking ahead and predicting what’s to come, but I never saw Mable coming.
If I’d known she was out there, I would have hunted her down years ago.
“You said you didn’t have a date,” she whispers, and I hear the disappointment and vulnerability there, the fear that she’s been played.
That I’m just another fuckboy trying to get off and I’ll lie if I have to.
I had lied, but it wasn’t about sex. Sure, that would come, but it’s not what this was all about.
I step closer to her, and she doesn’t retreat when I trace her jaw with my thumb, gentling my touch even as my body screams at me to claim her.
“I don’t. What I have with Cordelia is easy. I wouldn’t call that a date. It’s an understanding.”
“An understanding. It’s called a ‘situationship.’” She rolls her eyes and tries to turn away from me, but I grip her chin, holding her in place, needing her eyes on me.
“What do you know about a situationship?” I grumble before I can stop myself.
Fire lights up in her eyes, and I know I’ve fucked up.
Here I am getting pissed again, thinking about her with anyone when I’m the one that maybe has plans to see Cordelia today.
It’s all just for convenience. Cordelia was already going to be here, and we would cross paths.
I’m not going to pick her up, and we have an unspoken mutual understanding that there’s nothing between us. Never has been and never will be.
“What did you say?” A small growl leaves her, and it’s adorable as hell.
“I have never had a situationship.” I make that clear. “Nor have I ever done anything with Cordelia except that stupid fucking double-kiss-on-the-cheek shit I hate.”
I release her chin but don’t step back. I’m not giving her space, not right now. If she really wanted me gone, she could say one word, but she hasn’t, and hell, I don’t know if the word would stop me at this point.
“I haven’t been fully honest about who I am.”
“So you lied. Twice.”
“I just didn’t tell you everything. I omitted things.” She tenses, and I can tell she’s not a fan of that. “Okay, you’re right. I apologize.” I’ll own my shit. I have no problem admitting when I’ve messed up. “I lied.”
I drag a hand through my hair, searching for the right way to say this.
There isn’t one, so I just say it. “My family isn’t just wealthy, Mable.
We’re... royalty. Old bloodlines, estates, the whole fucking thing.
” I force myself to meet her eyes. “When I marry, I’ll take my father’s place as the public head of the family.
The press follows us. Everything becomes public. ”
She blinks, her mouth falling open slightly. “Royalty? Like... actual royalty?”
I nod. “There are hereditary titles and estates in three countries,” I laugh, but there’s no humor in it. “The Montclair name opens every door and invites every camera. I didn’t tell you because the second people know, they change. They see the crown, the spotlight, the access. They don’t see me.”
I step closer. “But you looked at me like I was just a guy on a plane. Like I was worth knowing without having the knowledge of those titles. It’s the first time in my life I’ve felt as though someone truly saw me.
You are so different from anyone I have ever met.
I didn’t want you to be intimidated or scare you away,” I ramble.
I feel an immediate sense of relief that she knows the truth.
“Not interesting, my ass.” I shake my head.
“I didn’t want to lose you before I even had you. ”
Mable’s quiet for a long moment, taking in what I said. I can see the questions forming behind her bright eyes, the weight of what I’m asking her to accept. Not just me but everything that comes with me.
“So if we’re together,” she says slowly, “people will watch. They’ll write about it. About me.”
“Yes.” No point in sugarcoating it. “They’ll dig into your past, your family, your schooling.
They’ll speculate and criticize and make up lies because it sells papers.
” I cup her face in my hands, my thumbs brushing her cheekbones.
So damn soft everywhere. I can’t lose this.
I won’t allow it. I can’t. “I should have told you before I pulled you into this. But Mable, I’ve never felt this.
Whatever this is between us, it’s new to me too.
I wasn’t lying when I said I don’t date.
I don’t do... this, and clearly I’m fucking it all up. ”
A small smile forms, making her cheeks rounder. “Okay,” she finally says, but I’m still holding my breath here.
“Okay?” There isn’t more?
“Yeah, okay.”
Her hands come up to cover mine over her cheeks. “Show me,” she whispers. “Show me who you really are. Not the crown. Not the name. You.”
I stare at her for a long moment, thinking there is no way I heard her right. But then again, Mable is all sweetness. I was a jackass to carry this on. I should have known if I had just told her even first thing this morning she would have understood.
A pressure lifts off my chest.
“That’s all I want,” I say, my voice feeling raw now. “To be real with you. To be someone you can trust.” That makes her smile grow,
“I trust you,” she says, and the simplicity of it undoes me. “But no more lies. Not even by omission. If we’re doing this...”
“We’re doing this,” I confirm, and I kiss her before she can change her mind.
It’s not gentle or careful. I kiss her with everything I’ve got. As though I am drowning and she is the air I need to survive. Only she can sustain me.
A hunger roars inside, and I deepen the kiss. I’ve been starving for this my whole life and only just realized it. My hands slide into her hair, fisting it in my hand, tilting her head back, and she lets out a soft sound that goes straight to my cock.
My hands go to the robe, pushing it off her shoulder so it pools at her feet.
She’s completely naked underneath, all soft curves and flushed skin, and I tear my mouth from hers just to look at her.
“Christ,” I breathe, my hands moving to her waist, her hips, memorizing every inch. “You’re perfect.”
She arches into my touch, her fingers finding the hem of my shirt. “And you’re overdressed.”
“Then let me change that.” I lift her off her feet, a small squeal of surprise leaving her. I carry her over to the bed, placing her down on it so I can quickly strip down. I stand there simply taking her in, spread out in our bed. I’m the first man to see her this way, and I’ll be the last.
“Caldwell?” Her cheeks start to flush deeper.
“Just want to commit it to memory,” I say before I come down over her. “You need to tell me to stop,” I manage, my voice not sounding my own. “Tell me now, because once I start—”
“Don’t stop.” She wraps her arms around me. “I don’t want you to.”
A sound tears from my throat, primal and desperate, and then I’m on her. My mouth finds her throat, her breasts, and the curve of her hip. I don’t want to miss a single spot. I need to taste every fucking inch of the perfection that she is. I’ll never get enough.
She arches off the bed, whimpering my name, and I’ve never heard anything sweeter in my whole fucking life.
“I’ve wanted you since the moment I first saw you,” I murmur against her stomach, pressing kisses to her fluttering pulse. “Watching you sleep in my bed, knowing you were innocent—” I look up at her, meeting her eyes. “I wanted to ruin you for anyone else. To mark you as mine.”
“You already have.” Her fingers thread through my hair, pulling gently.
The desire in her gaze makes me feel like a god.
I settle between her thighs, my weight pressing her into the mattress, and force myself to go slowly.
I have to make sure she’s ready. As badly as I want to be inside of her, I care more about making this good for her too.
No, not just fucking good: mind-blowing.
I kiss down her body, lingering at her breasts, my mouth wrapping around one nipple before moving to the other. I kiss her ribs and the soft curve of her belly. She’s built like a woman in every sense of the word.