Chapter Twenty-Two
The last traces of sunlight paint the sky in shades of orange and pink as I push through the door to the roof.
After searching what feels like every corner of Halfblood Hall, a hunch led me here.
Sure enough, I spot Dohwan's tall figure perched on the outer edge of the safety wall—the exact spot he'd scolded me for sitting on that first day.
Smoke curls from the cigarette between his fingers as he gazes out at the sunset. Though he must hear my approach and catch my scent, he doesn't acknowledge me. The sulky set of his shoulders tells me he's still brooding about being left behind earlier.
“Do as I say, not as I do, huh?” I call out, unable to hold back my smirk.
Dohwan takes one last long drag before calmly stubbing out his cigarette. I fold my arms and watch as he rises to his feet with feline grace, not a hint of unsteadiness despite the precarious perch. He swings his legs over the wall and drops down in front of me with fluid ease.
His dark eyes rake over me, nose wrinkling slightly as he takes in my appearance. “You stink of Eunho,” he says, voice flat.
I flash him an insolent smile and step around him, leaning against the glass wall to gaze at the horizon. The setting sun paints the sky in brilliant shades of orange and pink, casting long shadows across the rooftop. Dohwan slips up beside me, his presence a solid wall of warmth.
“I have something to ask you.” I keep my eyes fixed on the distant mountains.
Dohwan leans back against the wall, hands tucked into his pockets. He doesn't answer, but his silence feels expectant rather than dismissive.
I draw in a breath, steeling myself. “Did you have feelings for Ga-in?”
His brow furrows slightly, but otherwise his expression remains neutral. He seems to debate answering, his jaw working as he stares out at the skyline. Finally, he answers with a definitive, “No.”
I study his face, searching for any flicker of emotion, but find none. His features remain as impassive as carved stone. “Then why did you go through with the engagement?”
Dohwan's eyes narrow slightly as he looks down at me, like he's trying to puzzle out my motivation for asking.
After a moment, he sighs. “My mother insisted upon it.
At the time, I thought it might not be such a bad idea, even if I didn't like Ga-in.
At least she came from a powerful family.
The marriage would have solidified both our families' positions.”
I let out a scoff, the sound sharp in the cooling evening air. “Is that what's most important?”
Dohwan shrugs one broad shoulder, his expression unchanging. “For highborn families it is. Especially if your fiancé is not your mate.”
I chew on my bottom lip, debating whether to ask the question burning in my mind. Something compels me forward though, and the words tumble out before I can stop them. “Did you sleep with her?”
Dohwan goes still beside me, his dark eyes holding mine. I watch the conflict play across his face as he seems to calculate whether his answer might put him in physical danger. The thought almost makes me want to laugh.
Finally, he says, “Yes, I did.”
I try to ignore the unwelcome flare of jealousy that sparks in my chest at his admission. I push it aside, focusing instead on his face as I ask, “Did you know your mother was also the one who told Ga-in to cheat on you with your brother?”
His jaw flexes, a muscle ticking beneath the skin, but he nods.
“She told me afterward. Tried to convince me to take Ga-in back.” His lips curl into a bitter smile.
“She admitted she orchestrated the whole thing to test my commitment to the engagement.” He lets out a harsh laugh.
“Turns out I wasn't that committed after all.”
I shake my head, my stomach churning at the thought of such calculated manipulation. “That's horrible. Why is she like that? And how can she just stand by while your brother torments you?”
Dohwan's shoulders tense, and for a moment I think he's going to shut down again, throw up those impenetrable walls he's so good at maintaining. But then he lets out a long breath, his posture softening slightly as he turns to face the darkening sky.
“My mother is very traditional. Old-fashioned, even by fae standards.” His voice takes on a distant quality, like he's remembering something far away. “She believes that true strength only comes through adversity. That you have to fight for your place, prove you deserve it.”
The dying sunlight catches the sharp angles of his face as he continues, “When Dojoon and I would fight, she'd just watch. Sometimes she'd even smile. She said if I was going to be her heir, I needed to show I could defend my position—even from my own brother.”
My fingers clench against the wall. “She purposefully set you against each other?”
“All the time.” A bitter smile twists his lips. “Competition for her attention, for opportunities, for status … she'd dangle things in front of us just to see who'd fight harder for them. Said it would make us stronger.”
I feel sick imagining a young Dohwan dealing with not just an antagonistic older brother, but a mother who encouraged the conflict. Who orchestrated it.
“That's not strength,” I say, my voice hard. “That's toxic. That's not how family is supposed to treat each other.”
“I wouldn't know. This is the only family I've ever had.” Dohwan's voice comes out flat, resigned.
I shake my head, my fingers gripping the wall harder.
“I don't have any example of family either.
But even I know that's not how it's supposed to be.
Family should be your safe haven, not your adversaries.
You shouldn't have to constantly defend yourself from the people who are meant to protect you.”
A bitter laugh escapes him. “No, probably not.
It's probably the root of most of my issues.” He runs a hand through his dark hair, mussing it further.
“I only know how to compete, to be at odds with someone.
Maybe I don't know how to be anything else.” His eyes find mine, something vulnerable flickering in their depths.
The meaning behind his words hits me—he means me too. Our constant fighting, the way we clash. I feel something in my chest soften as I recognize the raw honesty in his gaze.
“You did change, though,” I point out. “You backed down. I just had to knock you on your ass first.”
A smirk tugs at his lips. “Maybe that's what I needed.” He shifts, angling his body toward me. “I've never had a female meet me pound for pound before. Most females I knew either simpered or tried to baby me. None of them challenged me the way I needed.”
I remember my other question then, giving him an assessing look. “Eunho mentioned you preferred male partners.”
Dohwan's face darkens at Eunho's name, but he shrugs one shoulder. “I did, for exactly that reason. Males gave me the challenge I craved. Females never did.” His lips quirk up at one corner. “Though I did occasionally take female partners.”
I frown, thinking back to Dojoon's smug face when he'd mentioned Dohwan's “conquests.”
“Is that what your brother meant then? About your past partners?”
A derisive snort escapes him. “Dojoon's always thought he could use my preference for male partners as leverage.
Our parents wouldn't have approved. They expect an heir, which obviously requires a female partner.” His jaw tightens.
“He held it over my head for years, threatening to cause trouble.
Though I suppose it's a moot point now that I've taken a female mate.”
The bitterness in his voice makes something in my chest clench. I think of Dojoon's satisfied expression when he'd dropped those hints, like he'd been delivering some devastating blow.
“Your brother's a prejudiced idiot then,” I say flatly. “If he thought that would somehow disgust me, he'd have been sorely disappointed. I couldn't have cared less who you were fucking at the time, male or female.”
Dohwan's eyes widen slightly at my blunt words before a genuine laugh escapes him, the sound rich and warm in the cooling evening air.
A shiver runs through me as Dohwan takes a deliberate step closer, his dark eyes burning with intensity. “And now?” His voice drops low, sending tingles down my spine. “Do you care now?”
I force my expression to remain neutral, making a dismissive “hmph” sound even as my pulse quickens.
But my attempted indifference crumbles when his fingers trail along my arm, leaving trails of heat in their wake.
He captures a strand of my hair between his fingers, letting the silky strands slip through them with agonizing slowness.
“What would you do,” he murmurs, “if you knew I'd touched another now?”
The question hits me. Before I can stop it, a growl rips from my throat, my fangs flashing instinctively as possessive rage floods my system. The reaction is visceral, primal—and exactly what he was looking for, judging by the victorious grin that spreads across his face.
He leans in closer, his breath fanning hot against my ear. “Because I care,” he whispers, taking a deep inhale. “Because another male's scent on you makes me feel like I'm losing my mind.”
I barely have time to gasp before his hand shoots to the collar of my shirt.
He yanks it down roughly, exposing my shoulder and the fresh bite mark Eunho left there earlier.
My back arches involuntarily as Dohwan's mouth descends, his tongue dragging hot and wet over the mark.
The rumble in his chest vibrates against me, sending sparks of electricity through my body.
His laugh is dark and knowing against my skin. “I knew he wouldn't be able to resist biting you after I did.” His fingers trace the edges of the mark. “But trying to cover my mark exactly?” He clicks his tongue. “I'll just have to put mine somewhere else. Somewhere he can't find it.”