Chapter Twenty-Three #4
“It wasn't always like this between us. The rivalry started friendly enough at the academy. We were both top of our class, always getting picked for demonstrations, always competing. But it was friendly competition. We were evenly matched, it was just fun at first.” His fingers trace absent patterns on my hip.
“But as time went on, the more we ran into each other, the more we saw of each other. It started to change. There was something else there too. At least for me.”
Eunho stays perfectly still beside me, hanging on every word.
“It had been building for months. I tried to ignore it. Tried to pretend it was nothing. Then one day in affinity training, we got picked for a one-on-one demonstration match.” Dohwan's eyes drift to Eunho. “It ended just like today—with me pinning you down.”
Heat floods my cheeks as I remember how that particular position ended up just hours ago. From Eunho's sharp intake of breath, he's thinking the same thing.
“I felt it then. The way you looked at me, how we both…” Dohwan swallows hard. “Everyone could sense it. The whole class got uncomfortable and broke us up.”
“I remember,” Eunho whispers.
“I decided in the locker room that I was going to tell you how I felt. But when I came back to the field…” Dohwan's voice turns bitter. “You were talking to Yeoseob.”
Eunho's face immediately drains of color.
“He was teasing you about how it looked like I was about to kiss you instead of fight. And you…” Dohwan's fingers still on my skin. “You scoffed and said you'd rather just take the defeat.”
“Dohwan—”
“Yeoseob asked if there was anything between us and you laughed. Said it would never happen, that I was just your rival and the chances of anything romantic were less than zero.”
I wince. The silence that follows is deafening. I look between them, seeing the dawning horror on Eunho's face.
“That's when I gave up,” Dohwan says quietly. “Buried whatever I felt and let it turn to resentment instead.”
I bite my lip as I watch the emotions play across Eunho's face—horror, dismay, and deep remorse etching lines around his mouth. My heart aches for both of them, realizing how badly they misunderstood each other.
Eunho groans and drags his hands down his face.
“Dohwan…” His voice cracks on the name, eyes filled with pain as he looks up.
“I was being a skittish idiot. After what happened on the training field, I was flustered. When Yeoseob started teasing me like that…” He shakes his head.
“I hadn't even come to terms with my own feelings yet. I just reacted out of nervousness, tried to play it off because I was confused.”
His shoulders slump. “Everyone seemed to recognize how I felt about you before I'd even figured it out myself.
It was overwhelming. And I was terrified you didn't feel the same way.” A bitter laugh escapes him.
“I laughed because it seemed ridiculous that you'd ever be interested in me.
Not because I didn't want you—seasons, I wanted you so much it scared me. But you had so much more experience by then. I thought I could never measure up. So I laughed at myself to cover it up.” His voice drops to barely a whisper. “Obviously, I failed spectacularly.”
Dohwan stares at him, and I can practically see him reassessing every interaction they've ever had, viewing their shared past through this new lens.
Eunho blows out a heavy breath and buries his face in his hands.
“So that's why you turned cold afterward. All this time, I thought…” He peeks through his fingers at Dohwan.
“I thought you sensed my attraction during that match and were repulsed by it. That your coldness was rejection. It made me resentful too.”
I look between them, shaking my head at the sheer absurdity. “So basically, you both thought the other had rejected you?”
I watch the two males process everything they've just learned, their faces a mix of regret and revelation. The silence stretches too long for my liking, and irritation bubbles up inside me.
Without warning, I reach up and smack them both hard on the backs of their heads.
“You stupid males! You wasted years because neither of you could use your fucking words?”
Eunho clutches the back of his head, giving me his best wounded puppy look. “Ow! What was that for?”
Dohwan just blinks at me, stunned. Then something shifts in his expression. A small sound escapes him—not quite a laugh, but close. His shoulders start to shake, and suddenly he's laughing—really laughing. The sound transforms his entire face, his usual stern expression melting away.
Eunho stares at him for a moment before his own laughter joins in. They both double over, and I can't help but crack a smile at the ridiculousness of it all. Soon I'm laughing too, the three of us collapsing against each other as years of misunderstanding dissolve into mirth.
Dohwan straightens up, wiping tears from his eyes, and I freeze. There, in his cheeks—two perfect indentations I've never noticed before.
“Dohwan,” I gasp, sobering instantly. “You have dimples!”
I grab his chin, tilting his face to examine it closer. How have I never seen this before? Then it hits me—I've never actually seen him smile. The dimples completely transform his face, softening his sharp features into something almost boyish.
Dohwan stares down at me, those fascinating dimples still visible, transforming his usually stern face into something almost mischievous. “Why? Is that a deal breaker?”
A wicked smile spreads across my face as heat pools in my belly. “No,” I purr, letting my fingers trace the indentations in his cheeks, “quite the opposite.” Those dimples make him look younger, more approachable—and devastatingly attractive.
I pull him down for a hard kiss, my other hand reaching out to grip Eunho's arm and drag him down with us. We don't come up for air for a long time after that.