Chapter seventeen
Marcus turned around to face the growing group surrounding them. He lifted his hands, palms facing the crowd. ‘Please, everyone stay here. We’ll deal with this.’
Mrs Calloway held onto Marcus’s arm. ‘Please, I need to come. Beau’s my everything.’
Marcus glanced at Rowan. He nodded. Softening his features, he smiled warmly at Mrs Calloway. ‘Of course.’
Rowan led the way over to the quiet zone and Marcus and Mrs Calloway followed close at his heels.
He lifted his hand to Atlas, opening his mouth to command him like he’d done so many times on previous missions in the force. Then he stopped himself.
Atlas waited, but when nothing came, he stepped forward on his own, his lead which was still attached to his collar, dragging behind him.
Marcus reached a hand out and placed it on Rowan’s shoulder. Rowan turned his head and their eyes met.
Marcus lowered his voice. ‘Don’t ask him to work.’
Rowan’s eyes flicked back to Atlas and then settled on Marcus, boring into his.
Marcus held his gaze. ‘Let him choose.’
Atlas looked up at Rowan and Marcus saw how Rowan’s features contorted, a confliction of emotions clearly battling inside him.
‘Marcus, what’s happening? We need to find my baby.’ Mrs Calloway’s voice was shrill with worry.
Rowan reached for the lead in Mrs Calloway’s hand. ‘May I?’
She reluctantly loosed it, and Marcus realised it was because the lead was her only connection to her missing pet.
Rowan knelt on one knee in front of Atlas and placed the lead on the ground in front of him. Atlas dropped his head and looked at the lead, then back to Rowan, as if waiting for a command, but Rowan remained silent.
Rowan’s top had stretched tight across his back, and Marcus could see the muscles on his back had contracted tight, revealing how tense Rowan was at that moment.
Mrs Calloway had begun to silently weep, and Atlas’s head lifted and tilted to one side, his dark eyes watching her.
He lifted his ears and they twitched, as if understanding her sorrow. To their amazement, Atlas dropped his head to the lead and sniffed again.
Then Atlas did something that made Rowan wobble unsteadily as he was taken aback. He lifted his snout in the air and sniffed. Rowan quickly got to his feet.
Marcus glanced at Mrs Calloway, giving her a reassuring smile. When he looked back, Rowan had got hold of Atlas’s lead with one hand, and had Beau’s lead in his other hand.
With his nose periodically dropping to the ground, Atlas led Rowan towards Jack’s beach safety stand.
Jack was sorting through a pile of leaflets, and he looked up when he saw them approaching, his brow pulling together when he saw how distressed Mrs Calloway was. ‘Is there a problem, Rowan? Marcus? Why aren’t you watching the competition?’
Rowan’s attention was focused purely on Atlas, so Marcus answered. ‘We have a missing dog. Mrs Calloway’s Beau pulled free from her when he was startled. Have you seen him?’
Jack shook his head. ‘I’m sorry I haven’t. I’ve been handing out leaflets.’
Atlas stopped at the stand and sat down, his nose sniffing at the cloth hanging from the stall to the ground.
Rowan looked up at Marcus. ‘Do you think he could be under there?’ asked Marcus.
Rowan grabbed hold of the edge of the cloth, and slowly raised it.
Beau was lying on the ground, his head resting on his paws, his small body shaking. Rowan quickly clipped the lead onto his collar. ‘There, there, boy. It’s okay. You’re safe now.’ He gently coaxed him out, pulling lightly on his lead, handing it to Mrs Calloway.
She took it gratefully and bent down, scooping Beau up into her arms, where she began to rain kisses onto the top of his head.
‘Oh Beau, my precious little angel. Don’t ever scare me like that again.
’ She looked at Rowan and Marcus. ‘I know I fuss. I know people laugh. But he’s all I’ve got waiting for me at home. ’
Marcus put an arm around her shoulders. ‘You’re allowed to make a fuss. Everyone can see how much he means to you. He’s safe now. Why don’t you go and see Tammy. I think Beau could do with a treat for being such a brave boy.’
People who were gathered at the edge of the main entrance to the marquee had noticed the rescue, and they had began to gather around.
Mrs Calloway nodded. She looked at Rowan. ‘Thank you so much.’
Rowan was on his knees, silently petting Atlas, a look of pride set on his face. He looked up at Mrs Calloway. ‘It wasn’t me, it was Atlas.’
Mrs Calloway’s smile softened as she looked at Atlas. ‘You’re right. Thank you, Atlas. You are a credit to Rowan.’
Marcus noticed Rowan’s features change, but Rowan quickly dropped his head, and Marcus wasn’t able to read him.
‘Once a police dog, always a hero.’ Jack said.
The people behind cheered and started to clap.
Rowan quickly got to his feet, and before Marcus could voice his own praise, Rowan slipped through the crowds, walking towards the exit, he, Jack and Marcus had fixed the day before.
Marcus’s brow creased, puzzled. He turned to Jack. ‘Can you let Veronica know I have something to deal with, and she might have to host the remaining competitions as well?’
‘Sure thing.’
Marcus smiled and nodded once, then he followed after Rowan.
Applause erupted from inside the marquee, drowning out his calls. ‘Rowan! Rowan!’
Rowan was on a mission, and the gap between them increased. All Marcus could do was follow.
Inner turmoil was pulling him in both directions.
He needed to be at the competition. Veronica had only meant to host the first half a dozen competitions, and then Marcus was to take over, but he’d also witnessed the change in Rowan when Jack had refereed to Atlas as a hero.
He just hoped the comment hadn’t triggered something Rowan was trying to overcome.
Finally, he spotted him leaning against the harbour wall, his head back and his eyes closed, Atlas lying at his feet.
Marcus reached out to touch him, but quickly withdrew his hand. ‘You okay?’
Rowan dropped his head and opened his eyes, which followed Marcus with sniper accuracy until he came to a standstill before him.
‘Sorry... Yes. I just needed time alone—to reflect.’
‘I called after you.’ Marcus paused. ‘Tell me the truth. Were you trying to get away from what just happened, or were you trying to get away from me?’
Rowan licked his lips nervously. ‘Both. I needed time alone to think about what made Atlas... and me, I guess, the way we are.’
Marcus noticed the way Rowan rubbed his hands together. The way his eyes darted nervously between Atlas and him. ‘Today was a break through. Atlas found Beau of his own volition. I can feel... I can feel mutual respect between us.’ Rowan’s voice was thick with emotion. ‘And once again... trust.’
Marcus didn’t know whether to speak. ‘I-I can sense a positive shift as well.’
Rowan met his eyes, and for once, his strong exterior had crumbled, and vulnerability appeared behind his eyes.
‘You do?’ Marcus nodded. ‘He always trusted me—trusted my command. Always did what he was trained to do.’ Rowan’s eyes seemed to look straight through him, as if remembering.
‘Then, that final time... The last mission we were on together. I made the wrong call. He trusted me, and because of that trust, he was damaged. Not physically... it was so much worse than that... I-I had to leave the force. Because every time I looked at him, I saw the trust I had betrayed. We were both broken, and I was too broken to fix him.’
‘But you’re almost there, Rowan. Look at him.
He’s a credit to you.’ Marcus took a step closer, so close he could see the chestnut brown of Rowan’s irises had shrunk to slim rings around his large pupils.
‘I don’t need you fixed, Rowan. I need you honest.’ He drew in a long breath.
‘I want you. But I won’t be your almost. I won’t be another place you pass through. ’
Rowan choked back a sob, and the way he stared into Marcus’s eyes made his knees tremble.
‘You know my temporary house rental is almost up.’ Marcus felt his heart deflate.
‘I was wondering.’ Marcus daren’t breathe.
‘Do you think Ruff to Regal could refer anxious dogs to a new animal behaviourist who wanted to get himself established in Seagull Bay?’ Marcus’s mouth dropped open.
‘And, whilst the animal behaviourist tried to establish himself, do you think he could stay with you weekends whilst he tried to figure out what to do with his house in the south?’
He didn’t know what had come over him when Marcus cupped Rowan’s cheeks and kissed him deeply.
Atlas whined and they both pulled away and laughed.
Rowan pushed himself off the harbour wall. ‘Come on. We’d better get back.’ He took Marcus’s hand and led him back towards the beach.
Marcus looked down, unable to believe what he was seeing. His feet felt as though they weren’t making contact with the ground.
Just before they passed through the entrance back to the competition, Rowan loosed Marcus’s hand. Marcus felt his chest tighten. Didn’t Rowan want people to know his sexual orientation? Or was he embarrassed to be seen holding hands with Marcus?
As if reading Marcus’s thoughts, Rowan turned around to face him. ‘You’ve never said whether people are aware you are gay, so I don’t want to put you on the spot. But whenever you are ready to hold my hand in public, I’m ready.’
Marcus’s heart swelled in his chest. ‘Thank you, Rowan. Let’s get through this competition without any further hitches, then I’ll be ready to... show up.’
Rowan laughed and shook his head.
Rowan’s laugh followed Marcus through the entrance and back onto the beach, low and unexpected and warm enough to settle somewhere beneath Marcus’s ribs.
For one wild second, Marcus wanted to take his hand again immediately. He wanted to walk into the middle of the competition with Rowan beside him and Atlas between them, and let the whole of Seagull Bay think whatever it liked.
But Rowan was right.
This was Marcus’s choice too.
Not something to stumble into because his heart had sprinted ahead of his sense. Not something forced by gossip, or Mrs Calloway’s sharp eyes, or Christine’s knowing smile.
When he was ready, he would choose it properly.
And perhaps that was what made it matter.
The competition was still in full swing when they returned. Veronica stood in the main ring, one arm raised dramatically as she announced the winner of Best Smile, while a Pomeranian with a permanently disgruntled expression accepted the rosette on behalf of all dogs who believed joy was overrated.
Children laughed. Owners clapped. Tammy’s refreshment stall had a queue six people deep, and Reverend Townsend was blessing a boxer wearing what appeared to be a knitted waistcoat.
Nothing had collapsed without him.
The realisation struck Marcus with almost comical force.
For days, he had believed every thread of the event had been tied around his own fingers. If he loosened his grip, everything would unravel.
But it had not.
The competition had carried on.
Seagull Bay had carried it.
Christine spotted him first from beside the main marquee. Her gaze travelled from Marcus to Rowan, then down to the small space between their hands. She said nothing, but her expression softened in a way that made Marcus’s throat tighten.
He lifted one eyebrow at her.
She lifted both hands, as if to say she had not said a word.
Of course, her face had said several.
Mrs Calloway appeared next, Beau tucked securely in her arms, his blue bow tie slightly crooked and his dignity apparently restored. Her eyes were still pink around the edges, but she smiled when she saw them.
‘There you are,’ she said, her voice quieter than usual. ‘I wanted to thank you both properly before the next category. I don’t know what I would have done if...’ She looked down at Beau and pressed her lips together.
Marcus touched her arm gently. ‘You don’t need to think about that now. He’s safe.’
Mrs Calloway nodded, then looked at Rowan. ‘And Atlas?’
Rowan glanced down at the German Shepherd. Atlas had paused beside him, calm but alert, his ears moving with the sounds of the crowd.
‘He’s had a big day,’ Rowan said.
Mrs Calloway swallowed. ‘A brave one.’
For a moment, Marcus thought Rowan might close down again.
Instead, Rowan looked at Atlas, then back at Mrs Calloway. ‘Yes,’ he said quietly. ‘He has.’
The simple acceptance made Marcus’s chest ache.
Mrs Calloway crouched slightly, though she kept Beau firmly against her. ‘Thank you, Atlas. From both of us.’
Atlas blinked at her, then turned his head towards Marcus as if waiting to see whether praise required further action.
Marcus smiled. ‘Don’t look at me, boy. You earned that one all by yourself.’
Rowan’s shoulder brushed his.
Not by accident this time.
Veronica’s voice rang out again. ‘Marcus! Are you taking over, or have I accidentally become master of ceremonies for life?’
A ripple of laughter moved through the crowd.
Marcus glanced at Rowan.
Rowan gave a small nod. ‘Go on.’
Marcus stepped towards the ring, then paused. ‘You’ll stay?’
Rowan’s eyes held his. ‘I said I would show up.’
Marcus felt his smile bloom before he could stop it.
‘Good,’ he said softly.
Then he turned back to the crowd, lifted his clipboard, and walked into the centre of the ring.
For the first time all week, the smile on his face did not feel fixed, polished or performed.
It felt like his.
‘Right then,’ he called, as the crowd quietened. ‘Who’s ready for Most Pampered Pooch?’
Mrs Calloway immediately lifted Beau into the air.
The crowd cheered.
Marcus laughed, and this time, when he looked towards the quiet zone, Rowan was still there.
Still watching.
Still staying.
And Atlas stood beside him, steady as a promise.