16. Kira
KIRA
The restaurant is nice, though I thought we'd be sitting amongst a crowd.
But this private dining room is nice too.
There are no nosy waiters or hovering guards to interrupt us.
I stick the last bite of my fish into my mouth and chew, savoring the flavors that melt on my tongue as Timur continues his story.
"So when we came slogging back into the house, half drowned and soaking wet, my father beat the tar out of us." He's chuckling, grinning from ear to ear after telling me how he and Roman almost drowned as children by skating on thin ice—literally. "We got grounded for almost dying."
"Oh, my gosh." I smile at him, but it's more because of his sparkling eyes and free spirit.
He's different tonight, looser somehow, like he enjoys the freedom of having dinner with me alone.
I think I like it too, though the nagging guilt over not having brought up what Victor requested from me yet still chews at my conscience.
"So, were you a troublemaker as a child too?" he asks, and he cuts a bite of his steak, which he's hardly touched because he's been so enamored of telling childhood stories.
I have to think about it for a second because there are very few stories I can actually remember. Childhood wasn't so easy for me, moving a lot, running from very bad people as my uncle and father ran their business. But the good moments shine through.
"I suppose I got in trouble for staying up too late reading at times, or drawing.
" I think my story pales in comparison to his, but it's all I have, because I can't very well tell stories that may identify my real nature.
"Or there was the one time we washed the dog in the kitchen sink next to the thawing chicken.
Mum was horrified." I snicker at that one, thinking how she had spent the rest of the afternoon rinsing that damn bird to make it edible again.
"Oh, come on, don't tell me you were a Goody Two-Shoes." Timur winks and has another bite, chewing thoughtfully as I try not to turn inward and think about my problem.
If Morin is really slaughtering my family, every day I don't point it out to Timur is another day that evil man has free reign to kill more innocent lives. It really pisses me off that he’s a double-crosser, working both sides of the sword.
I never met him, but I'd heard his name.
Though, I was told he was giving intel to Victor to help us better ourselves.
Not that my uncle would ever have tried to take down the Kuzins. He's wise enough to know better.
"You okay?" Timur asks, wiping his face. I've been pushing my food around my plate for a minute, my appetite so faint, I don't think I could eat another bite.
"I'm okay," I say, smiling. "This place is beautiful."
I've been having a good time at dinner. The last thing I want to do is bring up a problem that would cause tension between us. Victor told me to stay in Timur's good graces, and ratting out his right-hand man wouldn't make me a very popular woman to him.
My goal is to make him believe me and trust me so he'll listen.
Of course, that'll be hard to do, considering I've told him I'm a Belova.
And if he really believes that, he'll never believe that a Belova would speak up for the Mirov family.
They're sworn enemies too, which is why my lie about being a mole in their organization works. It's holding for now, but for how long?
"You don't seem to be enjoying yourself. Is the food bad?"
"It's the company," I say in jest. "He's a total narcissist, only talks about himself." I roll my eyes dramatically and he chuckles.
"Okay, well, what do you want to talk about? You said before we left that you had something to tell me."
Well, there is my opening, but it feels off.
I'm being put on the spot without any rehearsed story.
I can't just spit out that Victor Mirov thinks his buddy is double-crossing everyone.
What would he say to that? I'd have to come clean about not being a Belova and then I'd be landing myself right back where I started.
I've grown comfortable pretending to be a Belova.
If he finds out I'm not who I say I am, I'm not just risking my life.
I'm breaking his heart too. I see how into this dinner Timur is.
That doesn't happen when you dine with a hostage.
He likes me. He's been into me for weeks and we've had sex more than once.
And as much as I want to believe I could easily slip out and go back home to my normal life, I don't think I can.
He's a part of me now, tangled up in my thoughts and hopes, and I am falling for him.
I don't want to hurt him. I just want the truth to come out so I can stop fearing for my life.
If he can't stand me and wants to kill me, at least I'll know.
"I did, didn't I?" I just don't know how to bridge that gap and open up to him. The mood and timing have to be right.
"You did... so tell me. What's on your mind, Kirianna?" Timur's words sting my heart. That must be her name, the one he thinks I am, whom he has vetted to assure himself that I am a Belova.
My eyes widen and then I force a smile, though I want to vomit. "I was going to tell you your cooking is awful and we should eat out. But you brought me here." I gesture at the spread between us and he laughs.
"That's all?" He sighs. "Sheesh."
I suck in a cleansing breath, knowing right now is not the time. But I do need to find the right time to do so. I just have to keep this strong rapport going. So I slide my hand across the table and lace my fingers through his.
"Honestly, I was going to tell you what a good man you are. I was nervous. I had this whole speech planned and..." I let myself trail off on purpose, feigning the inability to speak clearly, then I look him in the eyes. "I'm falling for you."
That part is the utter truth.
The harsh reality is, I really am falling for him. I just don't think I'm ever going to get what my heart wants.
"That's so..." Timur is brought to silence by my confession. His eyes search my face but he stands, pulling me along with him. I don't know what's gotten into him but we haven't had dessert yet when he starts pulling me toward the side door.
"Where are we going?" I ask him, straggling a few steps behind.
"You'll see," he says, pushing outside into the fresh air.
The door shuts behind us, and he leads me toward the car, where he opens the door and gestures.
Then he looks up and down the street as I climb in and scoot over, not sure what he's doing.
Dryden isn't around yet, so either Timur is driving us home or he has no intention of going anywhere, and I guess the latter as he slides in behind me, shutting the door.
I grin and he slides across the seat, leaning in to kiss me gently on the lips. I accept his kiss, smiling into it as he pulls back.
"What was that for?" I ask, confused.
"Kira, you're the most incredible woman I've ever met." His words feel like daggers. I may not have been a Belova spy on Mirov territory, but I am definitely a Mirov spy in Kuzin arms. I hate how icky it makes me feel now. Because I really do like him.
"I am?" I ask, getting nervous as he slides his tie off and undoes his belt.
"You are, and I can't wait a single second longer. I need you right now." Timur's hands work his fly open where I see a heavy bulge. He's rock hard and it makes me swallow against a knot forming in my chest. This man is insane with lust, but it's all for me.
"Tim," I start, but he presses a finger to my lips.
"Shh..." His eyes get serious all at once. "If you reject me right now, I might not ever get the courage to tell you how I feel again." His hand slides down my arm, taking my hand in his. He places a kiss on my palm and whispers, "I think I'm falling for you too."
My cheeks warm as he lowers my hand to his crotch where I feel the painfully hard girth of his erection. It makes me shudder. God, he's so perfect, and I want him too, and it wouldn't hurt to indulge, right?
I'm still keeping this rapport strong. And that's what Uncle Victor said to do. I'm doing what I was ordered. He never said I couldn't enjoy it.
"Could you do that again?" I ask him, playfully smiling as I wrap my hand around his throbbing dick and lean forward while he sinks to a seated position.
"Do what?" he mumbles, head falling backward as I start stroking him.
"Be so cute and adorable as you tell me you're falling for me." I rise up now, inching closer to him. My core is starting to ache and pulse in preparation for him.
"Sweetheart, if you don’t ride me right now, I might very well forget who I am and lose all self-control. But I promise, your body will draw those words from my lips a thousand times if you give me yourself."
He curls his fingers around my neck and pulls my mouth into his.
The kiss is searing, hungry, like he's been starving for me all night.
Timur's mouth claims mine with a low groan that vibrates through my chest. His fingers stay curled around the back of my neck, holding me exactly where he wants me while his other hand slides down my side, bunching the fabric of my dress as he pulls me closer.
I break the kiss just enough to whisper against his lips, “Tim… right here? In the car?”
His eyes are dark with need, pupils blown wide. “Right here. I can’t wait another fucking minute to be inside you.” His voice is rough, edged with that raw desperation that makes my thighs clench.
There is no reason to argue with logic. The ache between my legs has been building since he first looked at me across the table like I was the only woman in the world. And when he climbed into this back seat after me, I knew what he wanted. I want it too.
I shift, hiking my dress up my thighs as I swing one leg over his lap, straddling him. The leather is cool against my knees, but the heat rolling off his body more than makes up for it.