Chapter 13
In all her days, Moira never thought she would be laying in a man’s arms that was not her husband’s, her body sated from the pleasure he had just given her.
No wonder her sister was happy. What Tavin had done to her, it had taken her breath away and her legs still felt like she had been riding a horse for days.
Yet he had not taken her innocence. Her heart swelled with affection for him, knowing now that Tavin was a good man.
The kind of man she wanted at her side, helping her rule her clan, and providing the next generation of McPhersons.
“Are ye alright lass?”
Moira shifted in his lap and he groaned, pressing his forehead in her hair. “Lass, please. A Scot can only take so much.”
Curious, she slid her hand over his chest. “Is there more?”
His chuckled sounded tortured. “Aye lass. Much more.”
When her hand grazed his abdomen, Tavin’s head snapped up. “Nay lass,” he said in a tortured voice.
Moira didn’t care what he thought he was protecting her from. Especially now that she knew she had found her husband. “I’m not going tae hurt ye.”
His jaw clenched. “Ye already are, lass.”
Moira wasn’t quite sure what he meant by that, but she touched the front of his breeks anyway, her breath stilling in her lungs.
She had grown up around farm animals and the like and knew the differences between a man and a woman, but this was something new indeed.
“What can I do?” She wanted to give him some pleasure as well, to show her appreciation for what he had done to her.
Tavin’s eyes were glittering with such an intensity that Moira felt it burn within her. “Touch me,” he whispered, as if he didn’t trust his own voice.
She ran her fingers along the outline of his breeks, finding the flap that would open them. When she freed the button, his cock sprang out, hard and heavy in her hand.
Moira explored him carefully, eliciting a groan out of Tavin more than once. She might not know a lot about how to pleasure a man, but at least the sounds he was making were more than enough to tell her that she wasn’t doing it wrong.
Finally, he stilled her hand, his breathing ragged. “Stop lass. Ye are killing me.”
She did as he asked, removing her hand. He stood, taking a few steps away from her. Moira saw the tension in his shoulders as he fixed his breeks and tried to think of how she was going to tell him that it was him she wanted at her side.
That she was falling in love with him.
But when Tavin turned, she saw the torture on his face. Rising from the dirt, Moira smoothed down the front of her dress. “Tavin, what’s wrong?”
He shook his head, his hair moving about his face. “Nay lass.”
“Something is wrong,” she said firmly, closing the distance between them. “Ye can tell me.”
His eyes were mournful. “I wish I could. I really wish I could.”
Whatever was wrong was eating him on the inside, she could tell, but clearly, he was not going to tell her right now. Reaching up, she cupped his cheek, the roughness of his stubble pricking her palm. “I dinnae want tae go through with this farce any longer.”
His eyes widened in surprise. “What farce?”
“I dinnae want tae have anyone by mah side but ye,” she breathed, her throat dry. It was the closest she could come to telling him how she felt about him until he did the same.
Instead of gathering her close and kissing her senseless as she had dreamed, Tavin put some distance between them, muttering to himself. “Nay,” he finally said, his expression shuttered. “I cannae be that man.”
Surprised, Moira tamped down the swirl of concern in her gut. “Aye, ye can. I choose ye, Tavin.”
“Ye only choose me because ye haven’t been around the others,” he shot back, his voice hard. “Dinnae settle on me. Ye have tae participate in the gathering. ’Tis the only way.”
Her heart crumpled in her chest at his curt admission. Any other man would be jumping for joy to know that he was to lead this clan, yet Tavin was pushing her away.
Even after what they had shared today. “Why are ye doing this?” she asked softly, not allowing him to see that he had hurt her.
“Why even touch me if ye have no intentions of...” Her voice faltered and her cheeks burned with embarrassment.
She had let him touch her intimately, yet she was expecting him to propose marriage.
’Tis a bunch of nonsense! she thought.
“Moira,” Tavin started, moving forward before deciding to halt in his steps. He raked a hand through his hair and Moira could tell he was struggling with something.
But the biggest liar was her. She was lying to herself thinking that Tavin owed her something.
But she would refuse to allow him to give up. “I’ve made mah choice,” she said evenly, straightening her shoulders. “But it will be up tae ye tae decide if ye want the same. If ye do not participate, then I will know yer decision.”
Tavin opened his mouth then shut it, a hard expression on his face. “Moira, I...bloody hell. It’s complicated.”
She fought back the sudden onslaught of tears. “Hopefully not too complicated for ye to decide if ye want a future with me. Good day, Tavin.”
Without waiting for a response, she headed away from him, her fists balled up at her sides. He was confusing her, making her wonder what his true intentions for being here was. She had literally handed him the key to the clan on a silver platter and yet he had turned her away, shutting her out.
Well, now he would have to make a decision on what he wanted in his future. She had given him the ultimatum of showing up for the games that would go on tomorrow. If he didn’t, then her heart would likely shatter in her chest. Instead of love, she would understand the bitter taste of heartbreak.
That evening, she sat at the head of the table as her family chattered around her, her heart warming at the sight.
She had missed this, seeing her family happy and glad to be with each other once more.
Will sat to her right, as her second-in-command, and Aleck sat to her left, the highest-ranking member next to her, of course.
Fennella sat next to him and Sorcha was across the table from her sister, leaving Aleck’s brother Duncan and Alieene at the end, pretending not to notice each other as they ate.
The only thing missing was her other half, the man that would take Aleck’s chair when she wed.
Tomorrow she would start her search and if Tavin did not show up, then she would be forced to truly seek a husband.
The games were meant to be a display of strength for the clans, a way to show off their sons, and how they could protect Moira and her clan as her husband.
Moira wanted so much more than a brawny Scot. She wanted one that would make her laugh, one that would make her sigh with happiness as they took their sunset strolls around the keep.
She wanted him to make her feel cherished, to be the reason she got through her day.
And at night, she wanted him to be the one that she shared her thoughts with, her dreams about the clan and their future.
No, she did not want just a husband, but a partner in life, much like what Fennella had found.
“A toast,” Will stated as he rose from his chair, holding his mug high in the air, “tae our fair lady of the keep. May she find her husband on the battlefield tomorrow and give the clan a chance for future generations!”
Fennella rose, joining Will. “And may mah dear sister find love in this husband, a man that will not only give her bairns but also keep the smile on her face.”
Will frowned. “Why must ye always attempt tae ruin mah speeches?”
Fennella stuck out her tongue at her former second-in-command. “Because yer speeches are horrid, Will.”
“They are not.”
“Children,” Aleck stated, joining his wife. “There is no need tae fight over whose speech is better.” He then looked at Moira, dipping his head in her direction. “I wish ye well tomorrow. The future of yer clan is important, but yer happiness is equally as important.”
Moira dipped her head toward her brother-in-law, knowing that his words rang true. She wanted to be happy, but at what cost?
And why was Tavin not willing to be part of that future, that happiness she so desperately wanted?