37. Alessia
CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN
ALESSIA
“ A re you ready for this, figlia ?” my mom asks when Astor is out of earshot. Astrid excused herself to the restroom and my mom made it very obvious that she could not wait to be alone with me.
“Mom, honestly; does it matter?”
“It does. I know you think it doesn’t, but your happiness is the most important thing to me, Alessia. And it’s him, he makes you happy, he always has.”
I sigh because she’s right, everyone around me knows it. It’s not something I can ignore anymore; this is the man that has had my fucking heart since I was old enough to know what that meant.
“I know, Mom, I know.”
“ Malyshka , we’re leaving,” Astor says. The side of his face is red and I jump to my feet when I see it.
“What happened to your?—”
“Alessia, now,” he says, grabbing my arm. I hear our fathers coming towards us with my father heading straight for Astor.
“She’s not going anywhere with you,” he says. Astor yanks me behind him and I yank out of his hold.
“What the fuck is going on? You hit him?” I yell at my father when he reaches us.
“He had one job —to keep you fucking safe. I told him to bring you home. What if something happened to you!”
“I didn’t want to leave!”
“He should’ve made you!” My mother gently pushes my father in his chest, pushing him towards the family room.
“Ander, that’s enough. Our daughter is just that—our daughter. If she didn’t want to leave, no one would’ve made her. Apologize right this instant for putting your hands on Astor.”
I fold my arms and stand next to Astor, waiting for my father to speak.
“I shouldn’t have put my hands on you. But when it comes to my daughter and her safety, I need to know that you have her. I need to fucking know that she’ll make it back to her mother and I in one goddamn piece.” Astor steps closer to my father and I shrink a bit when he starts speaking.
“You got one pass and you just used it. Don’t ever question whether or not I’m going to protect her. Don’t question whether or not I have her . And lastly, you need to understand that in three days, it’s not about my wife coming back to you or Eleanor, it’s me . See you at the wedding.”
He reaches his hand behind him and I take it as he practically drags me out of the house, quickly depositing me in the car.
“Ast, what happened?”
“It doesn’t matter. You know I’ll protect you, right?”
“Yes.”
“And you know that I’ve always got you, right?”
“Yes. But Ast...”
“What?” he says, pushing a piece of my hair out of my face, his calloused hands running down it.
“I’m not your wife yet,” I say, smirking. He kisses my nose and drives us home.
He holds my hand the entire drive, brushing the pad of his thumb across my hand. I smile inside, completely in awe of how he’s reacting. I haven’t talked to him about saying he just wants to love me. Mainly because I’m still waiting for the other shoe to drop. There’s no way we’ve hit a turning point when I’ve spent the last few years thinking he hated me.
I don’t know how I went from him ignoring my complete and utter existence, to him calling me his wife. Now, we’re a few days shy of a wedding that I was so against. I was sure I planned on packing a bag and standing him up on wedding day. Now, I’m finding myself willing the time to wind down so that I can start my life as his wife. It’s hard for me to accept the fact that even when he hated me, I never stopped loving him. I always felt pathetic for never having the ability to fully hate him even when he treated me like I had a disease. Zander was right; I always made myself known when Astor was around. I really tried with Zander. I laughed at things that weren’t funny, I hugged into him a little tighter, even though his touch made me sick. I smiled at him, even when I wanted to simply tell him to fuck off because his presence made me angry.
“Little devil, what are you thinking about over there?” I blink a few times and look out the window, realizing that the short distance to our house was completely eaten up by my daydreaming.
“Oh nothing, just remembering how much of a fool you made me look like when you couldn’t stand being near me.” He chuckles as he rounds the car to help me out, kissing the side of my head as he ushers me into the house.
“I’m the fool, baby. Don’t forget that.” He smacks my ass and I chuckle.
“I need to take a nap,” I say, letting out a yawn and pulling my sweatshirt off. We headed straight to my parents’ house when we landed back in New York. They insisted on going over the details of the wedding again. Caroline is growing increasingly impatient, specifically for the reception where she swears that she’ll catch the bouquet. I can’t remember a time she was ever this excited over a wedding or anything, for that matter, that didn’t involve hitting someone.
I turn for the stairs, slugging myself up them. My body is exhausted after Astor fucked me last night. He took me back to our room and did another three rounds. We finally closed our eyes to sleep around 3:00 a.m., only to wake up at 5:00 a.m. to catch our 6:00 a.m. flight. Our friends were all still drunk and loud on the flight home, so sleeping was out of the question.
“You coming?” I ask over my shoulder as he watches me. He nods, pushing himself off the counter. He hovers behind me as I reach for the door to his bedroom. I smile to myself, realizing that I don’t even bother going into the guest room anymore.
He plants a kiss on my shoulder and I take a deep breath, leaning back into him.
“Did you mean what you said yesterday?” I whisper, willingly myself to push the door open. He nudges me inside, shutting the door behind him.
There’s a gift bag sitting on the bed. I turn around and raise my eyebrow at him.
“That for me?” I ask.
He nods. “It is.” I saunter over to the bag, peeking inside and slowly opening. He chuckles at me when I hit it to see if anything will pop out. “Stop it, just open it.”
I laugh and open the bag, my heart warming when I see a replica of my favorite t-shirt and hoodie of his that I wear. I pull it out and smirk at him, lifting it up to my nose and inhaling. I frown a bit when it smells new. The whole reason I liked wearing them was because they smelled like him. He walks up to me and pulls it out of my hand.
“What?” he asks, inspecting them. I shake my head. “Nothing, it just…it doesn’t smell like you,” I say, tucking my lip in the side of my mouth.
“Hmm, I see,” he says. I kiss his cheek, taking the shirt from his hand.