CHAPTER ONE CHLOE
CHAPTER ONE
CHLOE
NOW
TEN YEARS LATER
There was a time I promised myself I would never let anyone into my heart ever again. The pain of having it broken over and over again in such a short time still sends phantom shocks into the battered organ every day, even after all these years.
But then I met Camilla.
Just nine years old the day we met, and her broken heart called to mine. My twin flame from the second we were introduced, and the best thing to come out of having my heart crushed and my hopes and dreams torn away in the blink of an eye.
Watching my girl grow from a child to the most badass mafia queen in the country has been an honor I don’t take for granted, but I miss her.
Not just because she moved out to live with her boyfriends, all four of them, but because she doesn’t need me anymore.
If I’m honest with myself, she hasn’t for a long time.
I like to think I helped raise her, helped to nurture the softer parts of her while her father trained her to be a ruthless killer, but Camilla has always been a force of nature, and it’s hardly a surprise she has four men falling over themselves to be with her.
Even after everything the world has thrown at her, she never lost her compassion, which is why the estate has been full of trafficked women she and the Syndicate of the Legion rescued for the last week.
She could have sent them back to dangerous situations. A lot of mafia bosses would have done just that. But not my girl.
No matter how hard John De Marco tried to beat it out of her, Camilla never stopped valuing human life.
I zip up the final bag and carefully lift it from the bench.
The more I think about her, the more my chest aches, because for the first time in all the years I’ve known her, I don’t know for sure that she’s going to be okay.
She and Crew, the leader of the Syndicate, have been missing for days, and each hour that passes without them being found has the hope in my chest fading.
I don’t know if I’ll survive losing her, but it’s a reality I may be faced with.
A body in the doorway drags me from my thoughts, and I find Ryker leaning against the doorway with an easy smile.
Camilla thinks I don’t know he’s my bodyguard, but all six foot four of him is pretty hard to miss at the supermarket, even when he ducks behind the aisle to remain out of sight.
He’s the only guard permitted inside the house and the only one that lives on the property. She must be paying him a lot because I can’t remember the last time he took a day off, but hey, at least he’s pretty to look at.
Ice-blonde hair, amber eyes, and so many tattoos I’m yet to find a free piece of skin, a combination that could make even the strongest of women weak in the knees.
“You heading out?” he asks casually.
I nod. “I’m going to take some food over to the guys. They’re probably forgetting to eat, and they’re no good to Camilla if they’re not taking care of themselves.”
“And you needed to do something to take your mind off things.”
I press my eyes closed and drag in a deep breath. “Yeah.” There’s no sense lying to him, because after months of him keeping tabs on me, he’d see it for exactly what it is.
“They’re going to be okay. You’ve seen how those guys are with her. You really think they’re not going to go to the end of the earth to save her? That Crew won’t do whatever’s necessary to get her to safety?”
“I know that,” I whisper. “But it’s been days, and they’re no closer to finding them.”
“Reinforcements arrived this morning, yeah?”
I nod.
“More hands on deck means she’ll be home before you know it.” He glances at the counter where three cooler bags rest, packed to the brim with the meals I’ve spent all morning cooking. “And clearly you’ve made enough to feed an army.”
A soft laugh escapes me, but the life I worked so hard to put back into it is missing. I put myself back together after losing everything once, I don’t think I’ll be able to do it again.
“Do you want me to drive you?”
I shake my head. “I’ll be okay.”
He watches me for long seconds before finally relenting with a nod. “You’ll call me if you need me.” It’s not a question, it’s a demand, and one I’m likely to follow.
I learned early on in our interactions that arguing with him is futile and should be saved for when it really matters.
I nod my agreement and do one final sweep of the kitchen to make sure I have everything.
He might be right. I did make enough to feed an army, but once I started, I couldn’t stop. The rhythmic nature of cooking allowed my racing mind to rest for the first time in days.
Sleep has evaded me ever since Bishop called to tell me Camilla and Crew were missing, and my own thoughts are a dangerous place to be in times of high anxiety.
Keeping busy is the only way I’ve been able to stop myself from spiraling.
Before I have a chance to gather the bags resting on the counter, Ryker steps forward and takes all but a small cooler bag, giving me the illusion of helping.
He leads the way to the garage where my car is parked. Among the luxury sports cars John De Marco used to collect is the Audi he called a bonus last Christmas, even though as each year passes, I’ve had less to do around the house.
I wouldn’t say I was close to the man, but he was beyond kind to me over the years, keeping me safe from the people who would have killed me if they ever got their hands on me.
And even when Camilla was old enough to take care of herself and no longer needed a nanny, he restructured my position.
As far as I know, the Lombardis are no longer looking for me, but I’ve never wanted to test that theory, and thankfully, I’ve never had to.
I pop the trunk, and Ryker places the bags down carefully.
The small bag I brought out nestles in beside them, and I check to make sure they’re unlikely to fall over during the drive.
The address Bishop gave me had my brows tugging together in confusion, but I didn’t question him on it. He has enough to deal with right now.
Ryker closes the trunk as soon as I’m out of the way and levels me with a concerned stare. Why does it feel like he can see through my carefully constructed walls to the brokenness beneath?
“You sure you don’t need me to come with you? When was the last time you slept?”
“I’ll be okay,” I reply, carefully skirting around the question. Because the truth is—it’s been days since I was able to close my eyes.
I don’t need to imagine what Camilla is going through right now, because I’ve lived it, and I wouldn’t wish that upon my worst enemy, let alone the girl I helped to raise, who I’ve loved since the moment her big gray eyes looked up at me with so much sadness it called to the broken parts of me.
In some ways we raised each other, and we put one another back together again after losses that almost destroyed us.
He looks like he’s about to argue, his deep amber eyes assessing me in a way that has me tugging my sleeves down around my hands to hide my fidgeting.
“Text me when you’re there and then again when you’re leaving.”
I sigh, but the genuine concern in his voice has my chest aching. It’s been a long time since a member of the opposite sex has cared about me as anything other than an employee, and the lonely part of my soul longs for that kind of connection.
But I’m fooling myself if I think a man like Ryker cares about me as anything other than an assignment, and I refuse to be that same naive girl I was when I arrived here all those years ago.
I know the price of letting a man close, and it’s not one I’m prepared to pay ever again.