Chapter 40 Dio’s Journal - Entry 290
I finally got a meeting scheduled with my brother. I’d rather slam my fingers in a door than see him, but if anyone can get Chaosta out of there, it’s him. It’s a fortnight out, but I have a meeting with him.
I’ve had plenty of time to think recently.
I’ve been struggling with Chaosta’s arrest more than I should be.
I think it's because I didn’t listen to her or try to believe her sooner.
The more I think about it, the more I realize I need to trust what Malam says.
If he says she’s not an addict, I guess I need to believe that.
Maybe my own experience has just blinded me.
Or maybe I’ve just been trying to avoid the other emotions I feel when I’m around her.
I still can’t believe the government officials have her.
I hope she’s not actually being held by angels, or even Alexander might not be able to get her out.
We should have been able to keep her safe, and the fact that she may not be is tearing at my self-control.
The intensity of these feelings reminds me far too much of how I felt back when I was in treatment, and I’m white knuckling every day right now.
Finally, though, at least the meeting with Alexander means I’m making some progress toward getting her out and just in time for our concert tomorrow. I have no idea how we’re going to pull this off with how distracted we’ve all been, but at least this meeting is something else to focus on.