Chapter 3
Three
Mabel
Sitting at the table, I reach over for the potato salad mama’s made for our evening meal. I load some onto my daughter’s plate, then my own and decide to look at my brother, before broaching the subject of what I noticed earlier today with him out in the fields.
“So, I saw today there was only three of y’all,” I say, crunching down on a piece of mama’s green bean casserole that I loaded onto my plate.
“Yeah, um, about that,” Colter starts. I watch his shoulders tense from across the table as he answers my question.
“What’s happened now?” I ask, sounding more annoyed than I intend too.
“The new guy you hired? Fired him; useless.” Colter replies, reaching for a bread roll from the middle of the table.
“Really?” Mama perks up from her seat. “I thought he was lovely.”
“Yeah, Mama, turns out he just wasn’t cut out for it. Always late for the early mornings,” Colter grumbles into his fork filled with steak.
One thing I respect about my brother is his punctuality. If he’s never late, he doesn’t expect his workers to be either.
“You should have said something. I would have started on a new ad today, I had the time,” I say, giving Colter a look.
“Sorry, sis’, slipped my mind,” Colter smiles at me, dimple on his left cheek showing.
“I’ll get an add out before the weekend,” I smile back at him. I, unfortunately didn’t inherit the one dimple, although my daughter did.
That’s the third cowboy we’ve gone through in the last two months. They never seem to be the right fit for Colter, but one rule I make for myself is, listen to my brother.
He’s out there every day; he knows what he needs. What the herd needs and most importantly; what the ranch needs. Ideally, we could do with a few more with the herd becoming larger as each season passes.
“I can help you, Uncle Colter,” My daughter says, looking up from her plate of food and my Daddy smiles from the end of the table.
“Ellie-Belly, I’d love your help. However, I’ve heard someone can’t get out of bed in the mornings,” Colter says, smirking at her enthusiasm.
“I mean, I can try get up in time,” Ellie says giving her best grin, dimple intact, nothing but innocence in her eyes.
“Stay in bed Ellie, I’ve got it,” Colter laughs, then my daughter slumps into her chair and pouts. Now I’m the one to laugh. I love that little pout; although, it’ll be the death of me one day.
“Maybe y’all should let her?” My daddy questions, finally getting involved in the conversation. “I’m sure Mabel will step in to help for now, take the girl with you.”
Ellie’s eyes become wild with excitement. “Mama, can I?” She edges closer to me, giving me the best puppy dog eyes she can muster up.
Shit. There goes my Monday plans and meeting with the farrier.
“Sure thing, honey,” I relent. “We’ll go out Monday,” I smile down at her.
“Yes!” Ellie shouts and Mama laughs. Daddy smirking under his fork full of mash potatoes.
“What are we gonna do with you, girl?” Mama chuckles to herself.
“We’ll make her a cowgirl yet,” My brother smirks and I glare at him.
This is your fault, fucker.
“She’s on your head, honeybee.” I raise my glass at Colter, before taking a sip.
“Mabe’s, I’ve been dying to teach my niece how to herd the cattle,” he mumbles as he fills his mouth with more food.
“Well, now you got your shot,” I smirk, leaning back into my seat.
“And would you stop calling me, honeybee?” He whines, slamming his hand on the table, making my daughter jump and then snort with laughter.
Never, fucker. You’ve gotten me into this mess.
I poke my tongue out at him which causes him to scoff at me as he shovels more food into his mouth.
It makes me laugh sometimes; we’re still very much kids at heart.
Typical brother and sister, always trying to one up the other.
Colter’s exactly eleven months older than me; people call us the Irish twins around town.
I’ve always found it amusing that my parents had us so close together but didn’t have any more children after me.
We’re either perfect enough, or we put them completely off having more.
I’m going with the latter.
I remember our childhood sometimes like it was yesterday; we were extremely rough and tumble. Add him into the mix, we were the three musketeers; always getting into some form of trouble together.
I think we swayed their minds the other way, twos enough. Anymore would have been an almighty reckless crowd.
Although, I’d always dreamed of so many more than my daughter who sat next to me at the table. That was before all the mess that dictated how my life’s been lived; with no thought to ask my opinion on the matter, even though it’s the only dream I so desperately wanted.
****
Settling Elle into bed, wrapping her covers around her as tight as it possibly could fold around a small nine-year-old girl.
“Mama,” Ellie whines. “I’m getting too big for this.” She smiles at me, and I look down at my baby girl and the realisation that she turns ten soon rattles my cage.
“No matter how old you get, you will always be my baby.” I laugh, flicking my thumb gently over her button nose.
“I know, Mama.” She looks into my eyes, that same twinkle shining back at me like it did the first time she ever opened them. I still see the whole universe in this one’s eyes.
One thing about this girl is that no matter the situation, she could always command the room.
I suppose the acorn doesn’t fall far from the tree really, just one look into her deep sky-blue eyes would make anyone bow down to her.
Well, that’s how me and my family feel, but I guess people would say that about their own child. But to me, she’s truly been my light in the dark.
And trust me, I’ve got plenty of dark inside of me.
“Night, baby-girl,” I say, placing a kiss on her forehead.
“Night, Mama.” She yawns back at me.
As I leave her room, with the door slightly ajar, I head back to the lounge and straight for the kitchen.
Cracking open another bottle of wine, I lean against the island, glass in hand and take a sip.
My phone gently buzzing in my pocket causes me to place down the glass and pull the phone out of my back pocket.
Jake; Meet me on the porch :)
I smile.
Taking the bottle of wine and my glass, I decide to leave my phone on the island. Pulling the sliding door open, I’m met with a familiar face sitting comfortably on a chair on my porch.
“Hey, stranger,” Jake smiles at me, lifting his glass of whiskey to his lips.
“Hey, honey. What’re doing here?” I ask, leaning in to kiss his cheek before taking a seat next to him on the swing.
“Stopped by to see Colter, thought I’d try catch Ellie, but he said you was putting her to bed,” He flashes me a smile.
“Yeah, you just missed her,” I reply, taking a sip of my wine.
“Damn you, and your bedtimes,” He winks at me.
“Hey! She’s nine. Needs routine,” I laugh which makes him smirk back at me.
Jake being at my place at this time of night is nothing unusual. His parents and mine are great friends. His family’s here all the time when they aren’t busy running their own ranch.
The Bennett’s primarily train horses. We get our working horses from them whenever we need them. They get cattle from us. It’s a well-bred working system.
Pun intended.
“Little birdie told me your coming out tomorrow night?” he asks.
“Jesus,” I start. “Why is me coming out tomorrow such a big deal?” I ask, scoffing at his notion.
Has it really been that long or are people extremely bored at the moment. If they’re bored, I’ve plenty of jobs that need doing that I could keep them busy with; running alongside our herd being the top one.
He smiles at me and raises his hands. “Hey, don’t start on me. I’m glad you’re coming out.”
I push his shoulder playfully. “Yes, I’m being forced out. You know I love listening to you sing,” I say, with my mind flying to a memory.
The trouble is, it reminds me too much of him singing to me.
I snap the thought away before Jake notices. Although, I have a good feeling he does notice. The man sitting opposite me has always been able to read me like an open book.
Besides, the pain behind my eyes is always noticeable.
Jake places his hand on top of mine and gives me a supportive squeeze. “I’m just saying, Mabe’s. It’s been a while; you deserve to let loose every once in a while,” he says, looking at me with that cheeky grin and my heart swells at the comfort he offers me.
I love this kid.
I say kid; he’s twenty-nine years old.
He’s one of those that if I crack open a bottle of whiskey at eleven in the morning on a random Tuesday, he’ll be the first to shout, “Five o clock somewhere,” and then join me before tackling what the underlining issue could possibly be for drinking hard liquor in the morning; and this is coming through some serious experience.
Jake may be like another brother to me; however, I can’t forget that he is actually his brother.
My heart murmurs at the thought.
“Besides, will be like our warmup for next week,” he says to me and laughs.
“I ain’t getting up on that stage, you’ve got to be kidding?” I throw back at him in complete shock at the suggestion that I get on an actual stage, in front of people I don’t feel comfortable singing in front of.
This man almost forces me to sing with him at every family gathering. Refuses to sing a damn love song, yet I still get roped into it, because he refuses to sing one. I’m his scape goat on the requests he doesn’t want to do.
Besides, we’re the only ones who can carry a tune anymore. Trouble with Jake, he plays all my favourite country music and the urge to not sing along to me is too painful; he’s a slick, smart man.
I swallow the remainder of my glass of wine before reaching forward and lean onto my feet to stand up right.
“Go on, slick, be gone,” I wave him off as he laughs.
“See you tomorrow, Mabe’s. Make sure you say hi to my favourite girl now,” He wipes his arm across his lips.
“Will do,” I say, before turning on my heels back through the sliding doors. Closing the blinds, I’m left with his soft smile and a warmness in my ever-broken heart.
The little brother I never asked for, yet I wouldn’t be standing here today without him. The little brother who picked up his big brothers’ messy pieces in me without a moment’s hesitation.
The little brother I’d never be without.
The one who’s going to make someone so happy one day, providing he gets off his high horse and actually tries to meet someone.
No one in this small town has ever seemed to take his fancy.
People that like him, he’s never been interested in.
As I watch him climb off my porch, I fantasise who she’ll be one day when he’s ready.
As I take a seat at my island, I pour myself another white wine, looking through the glass with hazy eyes.
Another day done, another day far away from him.
I lean my head against my glass, stem tightly grasped in hand. That’s when the tears begin to fall, like they did most nights, missing a ghost who disappeared on a plane that day and decided never to come back home.