Chapter 11
Eleven
Mabel
Saturday morning rolls around far too quickly for my liking. When I got home from the bar last night, I took two bottles of wine out from my fridge and guzzled them with such force it was slightly concerning.
I knew my mind would race all night, chugging down the amount of liquor I did, should have made me sleep soundly or so I thought.
Nope, not a chance.
I tossed and turned until the contents of my stomach came barrelling back up again. I haven’t spent the night hugging the toilet since I was a teenager, and it was a rookie mistake to make.
I take a look at my reflection at eight-thirty in the morning; I could look better.
After the last twenty-four hours I realise, I could also look worse. Glass half full and all that.
I fix my bun back into a more comfortable position and take my purse off the coat rack. I decide to take another scan of the driveway before walking out my door.
The paranoia’s in really deep.
I know Ellie will be fine with mama and daddy this morning, but the last thing I want to do is run into him again.
After yesterday I’ve no idea what’s going to happen now. Apparently, he’s going to keep popping back up. Twice in one day was far too much, after disappearing for thirteen years.
Locking my front door, I let out a deep sigh, resting my head back onto the door that I’ve just come through.
Aside from the deep hurt at his visit that’s coursing through the valves to my heart, he looked good.
He’s aged exactly how I expected him to.
The thought that I should have aged with him, not with him completely removing himself from my life, leaving a trial of misery and memories behind, causes a sting.
He doesn’t look any taller than the last time I saw him. The stubble around his jaw’s working for him, making him look more distinguished as the years have gone by.
Those green eyes still shining through what looks like pain. Those beautiful green eyes that I’d spent years looking longingly into.
At thirty-one years old, I’m painfully aware that Maverick was just a childish dream, the thought of forever just wasn’t practical. However, watching those around me, my parents and their friends, I always thought it could be possible.
Damn, even Hope and Luke got it.
Just some things are better left buried in the past. I have Ellie now, and she is my forever. She isn’t some childish dream that was taken away from me.
She is everything.
Reaching the door to my office, I pull the keys from my purse; happy I brought the small one today, so I don’t have to rummage.
I don’t have the energy today.
With almost no sleep and debating on whether I’m still drunk or if I threw it all up last night.
Placing the key in the lock, I pull down the handle and open the door. “Right girl, get the ad out and we are done.” I try and give myself a pep talk.
I begin to feel the headache forming in my frontal lobe. I rub my eyes and place my purse onto my office chair, heading straight towards my mini fridge where I pull out two bottles of water. Those will be welcome down my dry ass throat.
Popping the cap on one bottle, I take a seat at my chair and pull open my laptop to fire it up.
Leaning over to my radio, I turn the knob, to turn it on.
Chris Stapleton’s - Tennessee whiskey hums through the speaker, and I adjust the sound, opting for a lighter option with my forthcoming liquor-induced migraine.
Looking back towards my laptop, I check the ranches main email to see if there is anything important that needs actioning right now, or if it can all wait til’ Monday. I notice Mrs Hamilton has emailed over the schedule for the ponies for next Saturday at the town fair.
Wow, only a week to go until the celebration of the year.
I reply quickly before forwarding the email over to Colter, so he has it for his records. I’ll make sure to remind him to actually check it later, the man never looks at his email.
Moving over to our website, I click onto the job openings link. I let out a long sigh. I really hope we find someone Colter gets along with. Moving onto the previously deleted job adverts, I bring up the latest one and hit reactivate.
The cowboy position is once again live.
Leaning back in my chair, I still feel defeated. Taking my bottle of water in my hands, I open the lid again. Taking a long hard gulp, it doesn’t seem to be helping the dry mouth.
Deciding to finish the bottle, I’m unaware that the office door is opening. “Knock, knock,” I hear, jumping from my seat and you guessed it, bottle of water now down my flannel shirt; fuck my life.
“Shit!” I shout, trying to pull my shirt away from my skin now soaked with freezing cold liquid.
Looking up towards the intruder, I see it’s him. I gawp again, for the second day in a row.
“Nice to see that potty mouth of yours hasn’t changed much.” Maverick leans against the wall with a shit-eating grin.
“What are you doing here?” I manage out, reaching for a towel I keep on the side, I attempt to dry my now very wet chest. I’ve never felt gladder to be wearing a bra.
I’m correct. He’s now stalking me.
“I… uhm,” He starts, looking as sheepish as he did yesterday.
I look at him.
Damn, he looks better in the day light.
Although that purple bruise forming under his eye wasn’t there yesterday.
I quickly push the thought to the side. Focus Mabel. He completely fucked you over.
“Cat got ya’ tongue?” I smirk back at him, placing the towel onto my desk, it hasn’t helped.
“Sorry.” He runs his hand through his hair.
That jawline.
Jesus, Mabel, stop it.
Seeing him again, the box in my memory begins to open up, the thoughts flooding back as if on autopilot in his presence.
“How can I help you?” I ask sitting myself up into a more respectable position, trying to break some of the tension. This is my ranch; my office and I need to stay professional.
“Oh, Colter told me to come up here,” He starts.
His accent’s changed.
“I assumed it would’ve be your Mama in here but…” He decides to take a seat opposite me.
“Yeah, well, a lot has changed.” I shrug out, interrupting him. I feel his eyes on me, the tingle still very much there after all of these years. I look down at my laptop before realising something.
This is my office, and he has come into my space.
“How can I help you?” I say again more firmly this time, emphasising my southern charm, lifting my head to meet his gaze.
“Um, well, Colter told me to come up here to fill out the paperwork for employment,” He raises his hand to run through his hair. The blonde curls haven’t changed at least.
Hold on…
I pause, my gaze deep into his soul, startled by his response.
Sorry, did he just say employment?
You have got to be fucking kidding me.
“Colter, sent you up here, for employment paperwork?” I repeat his question with raised eyebrows.
Oh, my brother’s going to get it later.
“Yeah, he um… he offered me the cowboy job last night.” Maverick shrugs, refusing to meet my gaze.
This couldn’t be any more awkward if we tried.
I lean back in my chair, causing it to squeak at the weight. I don’t know what to say back to him, I guess I’m in as much shock as I was last night.
Without saying a word, I automatically get up as if on autopilot and walk over to one of the metal file cabinets, pulling out the application forms we needed to keep on record for any employee of the ranch. I hand it to Maverick with brunt force.
He looks up at me, and then at the papers I’m handing to him. Taking the opportunity with his gaze averted, I take a seat back onto my chair, which again, lets out a squeak.
“I can take a look at that…” he says, lifting his eyes away from the paper I’d just handed to him.
I look at him for a moment, the lump sitting in my throat. The same one that’s been there since last night when he turned up at my door.
I shake my head. “I’m good, it’s on the list.” I interrupt again, offering professional smile.
He shifts in the chair, looking uncomfortable at my response. He looks back down at the papers I handed him, and I watch his eyes scan over the writing.
“Can I, uh, borrow a pen?” he stutters.
I lean over my desk, grabbing a pen out of my pink cactus pen pot and hand it to him.
I don’t think it was intended to be a pen pot; however, I found it online, thought it was adorable and now use it to house the office pens.
Taking it from my hand, his fingers graze mine and I instantly feel the same bolt of electricity that would course through me all those years ago.
I gasp a little too loudly.
Moving my eyes up to his, I see the same look staring back at me.
He felt it too.
I quickly move my hand away from him and look back at my laptop screen. I need to calm myself down and remove myself emotionally from the horrible situation I’ve found myself in.
“Thank you,” he says, but I don’t look back at him. I keep my eyes firmly on my laptop screen and pretend to work as he begins to fill out the form I handed to him only seconds ago. I do my best to keep my breathing as shallow as possible.
I can’t let on that the bolt of what felt like lightening coursing through my veins has affected me. I flick my eyes back to look at him, and then I see it.
The pain in his beautiful green eyes.
The same look of pain I’d been carrying around with me for the last thirteen years.
I feel myself soften at the look in his eyes, even though this man completely ruined me, I can’t help but feel the nudge of guilt creeping up in me.
All through seeing the look in his eyes.