Chapter 33 Grace
Grace
Knock, knock.
“Grace,” I hear from the door. Johnson’s voice.
Oh my god, I can’t believe he actually drove here with the storm warnings. When he messaged me that he was coming, I told him to stay put. “No way,” was his response before my cell service stopped working.
“One second,” I call out. As I swing my door open, Johnson’s flushed, panicked face is on the other side.
“Why did you risk driving here? It’s so dangerous right now.”
He steps inside, combing his hand through his hair. “My messages to you stopped going through. I couldn’t stand the thought of you being here alone, without any way to reach anyone, and I just drove.”
Oh.
“Well, come in. I was getting my final hurricane prep going.”
He strides into the condo, surveying my setup. I have two flashlights, extra batteries, gallon jugs of water, snacks, a portable charger for my phone, and books all laid out on my coffee table.
“Impressive, right?” I chuckle. “Probably not all I should have done, but since we’re inland and the building has a generator, I thought I’d be okay to hunker down.”
He visibly relaxes. “They have a generator here? Great.” He pulls me into his arms and kisses the top of my head.
“Yeah, silly. If you hadn’t slept through all the storm updates, I would have had a chance to tell you.”
He keeps me in his arms. “Sorry, I got worried that you didn’t have anyone to get help from. Especially with Landon gone.”
Suddenly, a wind gust rattles my windows. A split second later, another warning goes off on my phone.
THIS IS THE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE: A TORNADO WATCH IS IN EFFECT IN THE FOLLOWING AREAS UNTIL 7:15PM – LAKELAND, AUBURNDALE, HAINES CITY, WINTER HAVEN, DUNDEE….
“Sheesh, I didn’t even know tornados were a possibility here.” I raise my head up towards him, otherwise content in his arms. “Our night at your house has become a storm party here at my little condo, for sure.”
“I know. I’m happy to be stuck with you wherever we are, Goldie.” He doesn’t sound disappointed at all.
I look around my living room. It’s the first hurricane that’s hit us directly since I moved here, so I’ve not had to plan ahead for one before. “There’s a lot of windows.”
He steps over to the flashlight, clicking it on and off. “Yeah, if things get bad, what’s the best place to shelter? Closet? Bathroom?”
My bathroom has a window too. “My bedroom closet.”
A thought appears to dawn on him, and he smiles at me. “How about we build a pillow fort in the closet?”
“A pillow fort?” I giggle. “Are we ten?”
“Okay, maybe not a fort.” He chuckles back. “But a pile…no, a den of pillows.”
“Like a den of sin?”
He looks at me with a gleam in his eye before pulling me back in his arms and sinking his mouth onto mine. The kiss is lazy, his mouth savoring mine, despite the imminent storm.
After a few minutes, he breaks apart our kiss but keeps his arms around me. And then I notice his eyes. They look decidedly mischievous.
“The things I will do to you in the pillow fort are going to be eighteen-plus activities only.”
Ahhhhhh.
“Well, that sounds fun. Just don’t eat all my snacks.”
He leans over to take a nibble of my ear.
“Oh, I’ll be eating well, but I won’t need your snacks.”
And now I’m turned on.
Apparently, Johnson’s worries about the hurricane have been replaced by different motivations.
“You’re awful frisky today, J.”
“Honestly, all joking aside, it’s just good to be here, know you’re okay. It’s been an interesting twenty-four hours. I’m a little amped up.”
“What’s going on?”
Then I feel him tighten his arms around me. “I hate to change the topic to a serious one, but can we sit down on your couch for a second? There’s something I want to chat about.”
Now he’s making me antsy. I sit down without speaking. He joins me a second later, and my nerves taper down when he rests his hand on my knee, like it’s second nature.
“I’m hoping this is obvious, Grace, but I’m head over heels here.”
My worry fades more at his confession. “Well, you did just drive through hurricane warnings to get to me, so that earns you some points for sure.”
He smiles at my joke but stays serious in tone. “If all things were equal, I’d be asking you if I could call myself your boyfriend.”
I think I wear my confusion on my face. What does he mean by that?
His eyes widen as he takes in my expression. Clearly he can tell he’s thrown me for a loop.
“Shit, that came out wrong. I do want that.”
Okay, he officially has me on a rollercoaster of emotions right now. “What? I’m confused.”
He squeezes my knee. “I’m screwing this up. I’m sorry, I’ve been in my head too much the last day.”
“It’s okay, but what’s going on?”
“So I don’t want there to be any doubt in your mind when I say the next thing. About where we stand. I would scream from the rooftops how I feel about you, if we could. I want to talk about whether we should tell Landon.”
I stay quiet. I think I can anticipate where he’s headed, but want to give him a chance to explain.
“I’m struggling with how I feel. I really didn’t think we’d keep this secret past this time, but there’s so much at stake right now—” He starts trailing off, knowing he doesn’t have to repeat all the dynamics, we’ve talked about them so much.
I weigh the options myself as he’s speaking, and I find my own head and heart aligned.
“This may be a surprise, but I don’t mind if we wait longer to tell Landon.
I don’t love hiding things from him, but we’re past the point where he’s not going to feel betrayed on some level.
The big thing for me is I’m enjoying this time where it’s just us.
In our bubble, able to ignore the outside world.
I’m not looking forward to dealing with all the questions from Landon either. ”
He raises his eyebrows—I did indeed surprise him. “Wow, okay. So I guess we’ll wait then? That’s what you want?”
“I love our bubble, Johnson. I want to protect it for now.”
“Our bubble is everything.” His eyes wash over my face, a look of calm coming over him. “I told my mom about us today. I’m sorry I didn’t ask you first, but I wanted to get her perspective.”
I’m more curious about what she said than concerned over the fact that he told her. “How did it go?”
“She was happy for me, for us, even though she was worried about the Landon dynamic like anyone would be.”
That doesn’t sound awful, but I can tell Johnson has something else on his mind. He drags a hand over my forearm, back and forth.
“I’ve spared you the worst of my story with my dad, but sometimes what he said to me as a kid, it still fucks me up.
” He stops and I stay quiet to let him find his words.
“I don’t even want to repeat what he would say, to be honest. But it was really bad, and a lot of times I wouldn’t even know what was coming when he got home from work, or on weekends. ”
“Oh, Johnson. I’m so sorry.”
“I don’t like talking about it, so people really don’t know, but I feel like you should.
And all the dynamics of our relationship, figuring out the right thing to do—it’s made me realize that I’m holding onto a need to prove that I’m not what he said, all the things he called me.
Trying to be flawless, be everything for everyone. ”
That’s familiar. “It’s a hard way to live.”
“Yeah, I don’t—I don’t want to give up something as special as what’s between us, just to please everyone else.”
“I feel the same way.” I kiss his cheek, and then bring my arms around him as he sinks into my embrace.
The intimate moment is interrupted, however, by a loud howl of wind, which rattles the window again. Reminding us that we’re in the middle of a hurricane.
“Let’s build that fort—I mean, den, shall we?” Johnson suggests as he starts picking up the larger cushions from my sofa. “Get ourselves sheltered better.”
Fifteen minutes later, my bedroom closet has turned into a pillow palace, with sheets and blankets to make the area we’ll rest in even softer.
“I may need to keep this after the storm.” I stack a couple of books in the corner for good measure. “It’s so cozy.”
Another loud wind gust hits the building, and the windows shake again.
“We should settle in now,” I offer. “Better safe than sorry.”
“Definitely,” he agrees.
After shutting the closet door, he sits down first, his back against some of the bigger pillows and his lower body resting on layers of blankets.
“Not bad. We can definitely stay here for a few hours.” He strips down to his t-shirt and athletic shorts and takes off his socks now too.
I sit down beside him, snuggle into his body, and lay my head on his shoulder. “No complaints here.”
He lightly tickles my waist. “Unless I eat your snacks.”
I hum at his joke and then enjoy the comfort of having all of this closeness to him.
A minute later, as he twists slightly to plant a kiss on my head, I notice his t-shirt has a number two on it, his jersey number.
“How did you pick ‘two’ as your player number? Is there a story there?”
“Not a big one. One of the high school coaches who mentored me my freshman and sophomore years wore it in his own playing days. So I picked it in his honor.”
“That’s really sweet, actually. Do you want to hear something cool?” A grin rises on my face.
“Of course.”
“Two is my lucky number. Every time I was assigned the number two at a race, something amazing happened.”
His eyes light up as the connection sinks in. “As it is here, with us,” he says softly.
“Yes.”
I snuggle into him closer, and his arm squeezes me. “Meant to be,” I hear him say under his breath.
A beat passes while we absorb the moment, and then he chimes in again.
“Grace, sorry I messed this up earlier, but can we make this official? Like use labels and everything?”
I give myself a full inhale and exhale to think about how I want to respond. But it doesn’t take more than that because I’m certain—the last few weeks have been some of the best in my life.
“Yes,” I say easily. “Be girlfriend and boyfriend officially, you mean? Yes.”
A big grin crosses his face, and he leans over to give me a firm kiss. God, maybe it’s good we’re dating in secret, because we’d probably drive everyone nuts with all our kissing.
I giggle at that thought.
“What?” He looks confused.
Oh shoot, bad timing on the giggling right after our commitment and a kiss. I explain why I laughed, and he chuckles too.
“Can’t blame me for wanting to kiss my beautiful girlfriend whenever I can.” He emphasizes the point by kissing me again.
We bask in the moment for a while, kissing, resting, teasing each other in turns.
“This day did not end up as I expected,” he says after half an hour passes.
“You didn’t go to the Waves facility at all today?”
“No, with the bye week, I really try to take a break, especially early on. Recharge a bit. With the storm, everything will be shut down for a few days most likely anyway. Did you end up having your morning class?”
“Yeah, but everything else has been canceled for at least two days.”
He starts stroking my arm.
“So we could just stay here in this closet, live off Annie’s organic crackers, and have alone time for two days?”
I giggle. “Wouldn’t you get bored? And achy? Two whole days of this big old body stuck in the closet?”
“Not with you. I’m never bored with you. And this body…well, I suspect it will have plenty of action.” He grins at me.
A flash of longing hits me again. It’s crazy. A few weeks of being together with Johnson, and now a turn of phrase from him has me turned on.
He’s definitely unlocked a side of me that had stayed closed off with other guys. The trust we’ve built, the way he cherishes all sides of me—I feel so safe just letting my body feel.
And so when I turn my head back up to him and see matching heat escalating in his eyes, I don’t hesitate. I take the initiative, shifting on my knees so my face is level with his, and bring our lips together.
“Yup, officially could do this for a few days,” he mumbles into my mouth after a few passes of our lips.
Suddenly, a thought shoots through my mind. It has been floating in the ether for days if I’m being honest.
“Johnson…”
“Mmmm?”
I pull my head back and catch his eyes. “I think I’m ready.”
At first he looks confused, but then after a few beats, understanding dawns. “Ready to…”
“Yes.”
He sits back, separating us further, wearing a mix of hope, hunger, and pride in his eyes.
His hand comes up to the side of my head, stroking a lock of hair. “You sure, Grace?”
“I’m sure.” There’s no doubt in my mind now that I’ve voiced the wish.
“I’m glad it’s me. Honored it’s me.” His face projects total sincerity, and our eye contact is steady and warm. The significance of his statement is not lost on me, considering our past encounter in college.
“There’s no one else I would want to do this with, Johnson.”
“Are you—are you nervous? We don’t have to rush.” His tone is gentle.
“I’m not nervous, and it doesn’t feel like rushing,” I reassure him. “I just had to wait for the right person. You.”
His eyes show that mix of emotion again, and I can tell I need to be the one to start things so he doesn’t feel like he’s the one pushing.
To be honest, I’m ready to be done talking anyway.
So I whip off my Tolliver t-shirt, wearing a pretty sky blue lace bra underneath that he’s not seen before.
His eyes flit down to admire my body unabashedly, the smile stuck on his face.
“My beautiful girl.”
His words keep me feeling brave. “Keep watching,” I direct him, sitting up on my knees before unbuttoning my shorts.
Now his eyes go wide, likely surprised at the pace I’m setting.
Once loose, the shorts start sliding down my body, and I pull them all the way off, down my legs.
Underneath, I have on matching blue lace panties. Nothing too scandalous in cut, but Johnson seems to appreciate them.
“Storm clouds outside, blue sky in here,” he says, staring, and then holds out his arms. “Come to me, Goldie.”
I shift readily into his embrace.