Chapter 9
‘Did you even consider that I might not want to do this?’ Savi was pacing her hotel room with Jesse on loudspeaker, along with the buzz of whatever bar he was in on the Nashville strip. She knew this wasn’t the best time for him, but she was past caring.
‘Sav, come on. You know Blake and I wouldn’t do this without good reason. I don’t want you getting caught up in this mess, I’m just trying to take care of you.’
‘I got caught up in this mess the second you signed your record deal, Jess.’
‘Don’t be so dramatic, Savi. Please. You don’t understand what it’s like in my world, it’s harsh and there’s a lot of pressure. You see the things they say about me in the press, I don’t want that for you.’
‘My world is not all that different. You think I’m not already subjected to criticism and misogyny on a daily basis?
Sure, it might not be on such a wide scale, but I know how to handle myself.
Don’t you think if we had been public from the very beginning of your career that media attention might have died down by now?
We’re four years in, Jesse. Where is this going if you don’t think I belong in your world?
We should be able to love each other out loud, not in the shadows of secluded cabins and hotel suites. ’
‘Are you saying you don’t want me anymore?’ he shot back, almost cutting her off with his bluntness. It was a defence mechanism, but it still stung.
‘No, of course not, I’m just saying I think we need to reevaluate what it is we’re doing here.
I can’t do another four years of sneaking around.
’ Her confidence wavered and her voice lowered to a whisper.
She almost wished he hadn’t heard over the noise of a group of men cheering in the background, because she was not the type of girl to give ultimatums. She had kept quiet for their whole relationship, not voicing her concerns out of fear of losing him altogether. She was exhausted.
‘Just give it six months of this PR stunt, Sav. Okay? We’ll talk about it then, look at how to launch our own relationship into the media slowly, avoid any drama.’
Jesse was romantically linked with every woman in his vicinity, all the time. It was a huge insecurity of Savi’s, but she had learned to live with it, because she knew she was the one he always came home to. When work allowed.
‘Fine, but I’m not happy about it. And I’m not waiting until those six months are up to discuss this again.’ She was already reaching for her jacket, desperate to get some fresh air and clear her head before she’d even ended the call.
‘You’ve made that pretty clear. Can I get back to my boys now?’ She could hear him heading back into the bar he’d come from.
She hung up without another word. He’d always had a blasé attitude about a lot of things, important life things that required deep thought and honest conversations, but it was beginning to annoy Savi more than it used to.
They seemed to be heading down different paths, and she wasn’t quite ready to accept that their future was looking a little shaky.
She wanted to believe fame hadn’t changed him, like it hadn’t changed her except for making her more resilient, but she was struggling to deny that he wasn’t the same Jesse she’d been introduced to at a food truck all that time ago.
Suede jacket in hand, she headed down the corridor to Marco’s room. At least someone was being rational in this whole debacle, even if her real boyfriend wasn’t. Jesse was supposed to be her teammate, too. Maybe he should take notes from Marco, who upon opening the door looked happy to see her.
‘What’s up, Cowgirl?’ He leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed as he took her in.
‘Are you busy?’ She peered past him and took note of his open laptop.
‘I can make time for you.’ And without questioning a thing, he shoved his feet into his trainers, grabbed his sunglasses and phone and shut the door on whatever it was he’d been doing and took her out for lunch.
‘You want to what?’ Marco stared at her, not quite believing his ears. He’d sat down barely fifteen minutes ago and she was already jumping in at the deep end. He studied her face which was slowly turning a pretty shade of pink, trying not to smirk as she defended her idea.
‘Our first kiss can’t be in front of the cameras, Marco. What if we’re, like… clunky.’
‘Clunky?’ he laughed, regretting it when she looked genuinely embarrassed.
He was great at putting his foot in his mouth with the women in his life, platonic or not.
This was new territory for both of them, and they had gone from casual conversations at the track to teammates to fake lovers in very quick succession.
They had known each other for years, but they didn’t know each other.
They had gone out for food away from the track, to a place that did fresh pasta and had outdoor seating.
They might as well soak up the sunshine while trying to get their heads around this journey they were about to embark on.
Tomorrow was qualifying day, and their heads needed to be fully focused on the race.
They had to get the awkwardness out of the way first. Except the look of sheer panic on Savannah’s face told him this might be uncomfortable for a number of weeks yet, if not for the duration of their unofficial contract.
She hesitated, cheeks burning. ‘We don’t know each other’s techniques.’
‘Relax, Cowgirl. This ain’t my first rodeo.’ He was saying anything he could to make this easier, and that included using his nickname for her. That was their thing. If they were going to survive this, they needed a thing.
‘De Luca,’ she sighed.
‘Fine,’ he laughed, giving in to her request no matter how strange it felt. ‘Come here.’
Savannah shook her head. ‘Absolutely not. Not now . There are so many people around, Marco. We’ve been disturbed by fans three times already.’
‘Savannah.’ He put a hand on each side of her wicker chair and promptly yanked it across the paving slabs, so she was closer to him.
‘You can trust me.’ And then he put one hand on her waist and leaned in, closer and closer until she couldn’t back up anymore.
He went for gentle, but the reality was, he was a little afraid of her.
His flirting had been intentional of late, but he never imagined being in a position where he might get to cross a line even if it was all a lie.
It only lasted a few seconds before he pulled back, but when he did, he rested his forehead on hers. Just for a moment, so he could soak it all in. He knew from that kiss alone, he had made a mistake. But as long as Savannah needed him in her corner, that was where he would be.
‘Have you done this before?’
‘What, kissed a cowgirl?’
‘No,’ she rolled her eyes, ‘faked it.’
‘Oh. No. Also never kissed a cowgirl, so there’s a first time for everything.
’ He winked and then snuck in another quick peck before settling back in his seat, making it look so natural to the outside world and ignoring how it felt on the inside.
He would have to keep the kisses to a minimum throughout this whole thing.
‘Jesse has been drunk texting me since our argument. Apologising profusely, telling me he loves me, and he trusts me.’ She bit into a piece of chicken and checked her phone again.
‘If you were mine and I knew some other guy was gonna be all over you, I’d want to at least talk to you about the details.
I get that he couldn’t show his face at the track and have a meeting with us, but was he just going to rely on his messenger pigeon and not have a real conversation about it?
You guys should be outlining every tiny little thing, what you’re both okay with and what you’re not.
I mean, what if I grab your ass and he flips out? ’
‘Simple, don’t grab my ass. Be civilised, respectful, and there shouldn’t be an issue.’
‘Okay, but hear me out… an ass grab will really sell it,’ he teased, hoping she understood him well enough to know he was joking. Sort of. He was attracted to her, but he had nothing but respect for both her and her relationship. He just couldn’t help but flirt, it was in his nature.
‘You’re going to have to stop flirting with me for this to work, De Luca.’ She sipped her water, choking as she did. ‘That was not still. God, I hate sparkling.’
‘You’re gonna have to stop stealing my drinks.’ He took his glass out of her hand. ‘See the lip gloss stain?’ Marco pointed at the rim of her own glass. ‘Yours.’
‘I’m serious. Doesn’t matter how harmless it is, that’s how lines get blurred.’
‘Yeah, yeah, and you’re super happy in your relationship so this,’ he gestured between them, ‘is always going to be an act.’
‘You’re getting it. Even if you are a sarcastic little–’
‘Language, Cowgirl,’ he smirked.
‘Don’t start acting all prim and proper, Monaco. Your recent antics have proved you’re anything but.’
He thought she should give him credit where it was due, he had truly shocked his friends when he’d emerged with model number two, and then three…
With his fellow male drivers on the team now married off, it was Marco’s turn to be the stereotypical rich and famous playboy.
It just didn’t really suit him, not when he’d been crying over Esme a short while ago.
He was trying too hard to be someone he wasn’t.
‘And my recent antics are why I’m so willing to do this.
I know what it’s like to have my sex life talked about by those who have nothing better to do, and I don’t want that for you.
So, we need this to look like we’re really in love, not just fooling around.
The world needs to believe that this is different, that you’re special.
I won’t let them put you in the same category as those other women. ’
‘I am special,’ she argued. ‘But you are never taking me on a yacht or to a club. Or a log cabin, come to think of it…’ She trailed off and stared down at the last few bites of pasta.