Chapter One #2
I take a few beats to mull over Max’s words.
I’ve seen hints of a submissive, or what I think is a submissive in Scarlett—moments where I deepened my tone and used a dom-voice, and she instantly complied.
I don’t want that from her all the time.
I still want my Scarlett, my Flower who’s feisty and smart and has a tongue as sharp as her wit.
But when it’s time to strip her and claim her in whatever way I want… yes, a submissive might be nice.
When I relay this to Max, he nods understandingly.
“In that case, you’ll need a lot of meticulous training and conditioning—and a fuck ton of trust. She needs to trust you not only with her life, but with her emotions.
She needs to know you’ll protect her from the world.
She needs to be able to rely on you enough to let you fuck with her head, knowing that you’ll fix her once you’re done. ”
Scarlett has never had anything but raging distrust for me. “I don’t see that happening.”
“Not immediately,” Max agrees. “It’ll take months, maybe even years for her to trust you, to learn to hand over all control to you. But I’ve seen hints of a natural sub in her, so I think you can make it happen.”
“Think isn’t good enough,” I mutter. I don’t just crave; I require her submission.
“Whether or not it works is on you. Your patience, your understanding, your building her trust and reliance on you. If you put in the effort, you’ll get the result. But if you get hotheaded and go off on her like you did the first time around… that doesn’t lead to trust.”
“Won’t happen again.” If I feel myself reaching a breaking point, I’ll walk away.
“Good,” Max nods. “First of all, let’s talk about the harsh and soft systems you’ll need to use.
When you order her to do something, it needs to be firm and unbending.
You don’t give her an inch. If she does it, you soften as you praise her—and I mean a lot of praise.
You’re not conditioning a willing sub, which means it’ll take a lot more effort and meticulous control.
If you tell her to eat from your hand and lick crumbs from your fingers—”
“She’d bite my hand off.”
“And if she tries, grab her hair or jaw, force her mouth open, and rub your fingers over her tongue. Show her that she can comply off the bat, or she can be forced—this’ll teach her that compliance is in her best interest. Then, you reinforce that by holding her.
Soft caresses, gentle touches, words of praise—genuine ones.
You need to believe in this process as much as you want her to.
You need to be all in if you want her to be all in.
Plan to spend double the time on aftercare as you do on any scene or exertion of dominance.
If you’re really into the eating routine, make it a ritual. Knowing her, she’ll fight it at first.”
“And she’ll fight aftercare just as hard. She didn’t want me to touch her before, so she certainly won’t be accepting of it after I get her back. When I get her back.” She had just stopped flinching every time I moved in her vicinity before she poisoned me.
Poisoned me. Almost killed me, but went back at the last moment and saved my life.
Each time I think of that, I’m filled with equal parts anger and admiration.
My clever, clever girl was playing chess while I was playing checkers.
She played me like a fiddle, and while I’m so damn angry about it, I’m also proud of her.
My chosen woman is as cunning and smart as they come.
Once she’s truly become mine and accepted me, that’ll work in my favor.
She’ll see things I don’t, be able to plan in a way I don’t.
I imagine she’d be brilliant in organizing ops and contingencies.
I fantasize about a future like that as much as I look forward to the battle of wills that it’ll take to get there. I imagine sitting in my office with her on my lap, and having her go over my and my operative’s plans. Telling me what I’m missing. What I neglected yet she noticed.
God, she’ll be so fucking perfect, and I’ll make sure she’s mine, if I find her. No, when I find her. Toby’s close. I’m close to having her back in my arms, under my control. The thought of having her once again is the only thing keeping me centered.
“You’ll get her back,” Max assures me. “Very soon, which means you need to make plans right now. Every day has to have a purpose, and there need to be rest days after push days. If you go hard on her in a scene, if you punish and break her so you can put her back together, you need to plan on days of aftercare—make your schedule around it. She shouldn’t leave your side after a moment of vulnerability, whether she hands over power to you or you take it, because that gives you an opening to become her rock. Now, let’s talk about the risks.”
“She’ll try to kill me again.” I know she will, and the thought makes me smile. I won’t give her a single opportunity to.
“Aside from the obvious,” Max quips. “You’ll be conditioning her in harsh, thorough ways, and no amount of perfect aftercare will guarantee that she doesn’t withdraw into herself to escape the turmoil.
I’ve seen it happen—especially when I was undercover in that disgusting fucking ring.
” He shakes his head, looking reviled. “Women, girls pushed so far they shut off from the world just to escape the pain.”
“I won’t be hurting her.” I’m still committed to the promise I made her; I’ll never hurt her again. I’ll make her do things that’ll probably make her wish I was spanking her or giving her corporal punishments, but she won’t get off that easy.
Pain is so… predictable. Other things hit much harder, reach much deeper.
“Doesn’t matter. Emotional pain always supersedes physical pain. Tell me, Grey, will she be happy to see you again?”
I don’t have to respond for Max to know the answer. Of course Scarlett won’t be happy to see me again—she’ll be terrified and possibly murderous. I’ll need to subdue her right off the bat.
And once I manage to get her here… that’s where the fun will begin.