Chapter 23
Lynch
Ihadn't planned on walking out on Rae, but I had no choice.
I was at my breaking point.
I didn’t know what got to me more—the fact that Rae had an aneurysm she never told me about or didn't plan to have the surgery to fix it.
I simply couldn't fathom it. I wanted to hear her out and try to sort through it, but the more she spoke, the more wound up I became.
I didn't want to say anything I might regret, so I left and went to the waiting room to cool off.
I hadn't planned on being there long—just enough to wrap my head around things, but after almost four hours, I was still sitting in the same damn spot. Hell, I might've sat there all night if Viper and Hawk hadn't walked in.
When I saw them coming toward me, I immediately asked, "What the hell are you two doing here?"
"Came to see about you and your girl."
"But you should be helping the guys track down Sophie and—"
"She's good," Viper interrupted. "Already back at the clubhouse with Jagger."
"What? You got to be kidding me.” I glanced up at the clock to make sure I hadn't lost my mind. "I've only been gone a few hours."
"A few hours was all we needed," Viper answered as he sat down next to me. "As soon as Kordarius started talking, we were set."
“Well, fill me in. I want to know everything.”
“Not a lot to tell... Jagger left the prison and met us at the address Kordarius had given us, and we immediately surrounded the place.” I could almost imagine being there as Hawk explained, “I gotta tell ya, the place was a real dump. It was an old crack house with busted windows and doors that were barely hanging on the hinges. We could literally see Booker and Jenson sitting in the living room smoking a fucking joint and drinking a 45. Neither of them had the first clue that we were there.”
“So, you didn’t have any trouble getting inside?”
“Hell, nah. Jagger, Shotgun, and I went around back, and Country and Rafe managed to crawl through a bedroom window.”
“Yeah, they were the ones who found Sophie..” Viper shook his head with disgust. “She was tied up on the floor, and they were able to get her out without Booker even knowing she was gone.”
“No shit?”
“Oh yeah, they were both three sheets to the wind when we stormed inside the house.” Hawk looked quite pleased as he snickered. "You should've seen the look on Booker’s face when we busted up in his living room. He had no fucking idea what was going on."
"Booker reached for his weapon, but it was too late. Jagger had already pulled the trigger, and Shotgun, too,” Viper added. “Hell, neither of these assholes stood a chance against us.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear.” Some of the tension I’d been carrying started to fade as I asked, "So, Sophie's okay? He didn't fuck with her?"
"The whole thing scared the hell out of her,” Viper answered. “She's a little shaken and will be for a while, but in time, she should be fine.”
“And Tully?”
“Tully has been dealt with and Kordarius, too." Before I could question either of them further, Viper leaned over to me and said, "In fact, everything's been dealt with. Now, tell us what's going on with your girl."
"I wish I fucking knew." I leaned back in the chair and rested my head against the wall. "I'm sure Locke told you she was in a wreck. Got a pretty nasty bump on the head, so they did a CT to make sure she was okay."
"I take it she's not okay."
"No, no, she's not. She's got an aneurysm. A pretty big one." I couldn't even look at Viper as I continued, "The doc wants her to have surgery, but Rae is totally against it—says the risk of complications is too fucking high."
"And what happens if she doesn't have the surgery?"
"The damn thing could rupture, and she'd die."
"Damn, brother, that's tough."
"Yeah, the whole thing is fucked." I lowered my head and sighed. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do here. I think she should have the surgery, but I can't force her. It's her choice, but I can't stand the thought of losing her."
"Yeah, you're definitely in a tight spot."
"What the hell am I going to do?"
"The only thing you can do." He placed his hand on my shoulder. "Be there for her. Support her and pray things work out."
"And if they don't?"
"Then, they don't." Viper looked me dead in the eye and said, "I hate to break it to you, son, but there are no guarantees in this life—not for any of us. You just gotta make the best of what you have while you have it."
"You make it sound so simple."
"Oh, no, it's not simple or easy or anything of the sort. Loving someone is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. You’re trusting someone with your heart. Sometimes it works out in your favor. Sometimes it doesn't. Now, you just have to decide if you love her enough to see it through."
"Well, I'm sure as hell not walking away."
"I didn't think you would." Viper gave me a slight pat on the shoulder, then stood. "I think it's time for you to go sort things out with your girl."
"I think you might be right."
Hawk leaned down and gave me a brotherly hug. "You know we're here if you need anything.”
“I do, and I appreciate it, brother.”
“Keep us posted on things.”
“You know I will.”
As soon as they left, I got up and walked back to Raelyn’s room. I tapped on her door, and as I entered, Rae’s mother was sitting next to her bed while she read something on her phone. When she looked up and saw that it was me, she gasped, “Oh, I thought you were one of the nurses.”
“No, it’s just me.” I stepped further into the room. “I was hoping to have a word with Raelyn.”
She looked over to Rae for approval, and as soon as she nodded, her mother stood and said, “Of course. I was just about to head home anyway.”
“You’ll be back in the morning?” Rae asked, sounding hopeful.
“Yes, sweetheart.” Her mother leaned over and hugged her gently. “I’ll be here first thing. And if it’s okay, Josey and Jacoby want to come by, too.”
“Yes, that will be fine. I’d like to see them.”
“Great. I’ll let them know.”
Rae looked so vulnerable, so fragile, as she watched her mother gather her things and walk out of the room.
I wanted to go to her, take her into my arms, and promise her everything would be okay, but before that could happen, there were things that needed to be said.
She could barely look at me. “I thought you left.”
“No, I just needed some time to think.”
“Think about what?”
“You.” I was still across the room. "I had one rule. It was non-negotiable. You knew that, and you still agreed to follow it. You promised.”
“I’m not walking out on you, Conor. I’m just not having an operation that might make me blind or unable to speak.”
“As far as I’m concerned, you not having a surgery that would save your life”—I argued—“is the same as walking out on me.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I want you to say that you’ll have the surgery.” I stepped over to the edge of her bed and took her hand in mind. “I want you to say you’re not going to let this take you away from me.”
“I wish I could say those things to you. I really do”—her eyes dropped to her lap—“but I just don’t know if I can do it.”
“You’ve been running from this for two years, babe. You’ve jumped off buildings and faced speeding trains just trying to get away from it, but the time has come for you to face this thing head-on.”
“You sound like my parents.” Rae leaned her head back on the pillow. “They’ve been upset with me all day.”
“As they should be. Your choices affect them, just like they affect me.”
“But none of you are seeing this the way I do. If I have this operation, it could change everything.” Tears filled her eyes as she explained, “I might end up being someone totally different... someone you don’t want.”
“That’s not going to happen, Rae.” I sat down on the bed next to her as I said, “Vanderbilt has the best neurological surgeons in the South, and from what I read, Dr. Grant is one of the best in the country.”
“You read about him?”
“Well, yeah. I had to make sure this guy wasn’t some fucking quack.” I gave her a playful wink. “I want only the best for my girl.”
“So, you really think he can pull this off?”
“I really do.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yes, I’ll have the surgery.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously. After listening to everything my parents had to say, and now you, I think it’s the right thing to do.
Or at least, I hope it is. I guess we will see soon enough.
” She reached over and pressed the nurse call button as she said, “I have to let the nurse on duty know, so she can notify Dr. Grant.”
I couldn’t believe it.
She was actually going through with it.
Unable to resist, I pulled Rae into my arms, hugging her close to my chest as I whispered, “My day just got made.”
I was still holding her tight when the nurse came in and asked, “Did you need something?”
“Yes.” I released Rae from our embrace as she told her, “I’ve decided to have the surgery.”
“Oh, that’s great. I’ll call Dr. Grant and get things set up.” She stood there for a moment, then frowned. “Umm, I’m sorry, but visiting hours are over.”
“I’ve gotta go?”
“Afraid so, but you’re welcome to come back first thing tomorrow.”
“Well, damn.”
I’d hoped that the nurse would leave and give me a minute alone to say goodbye, but she didn’t.
Instead, she stood and waited with a feigned smile plastered across her face.
Rae patted me on the shoulder and whispered, “I think you better go. Besides, I need to call my parents and let them know I decided to have the surgery.”
“Okay, but I don’t like it.” I leaned over and kissed her, then stood up. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
“I’ll be here.”
It didn’t feel right leaving her there alone, but unfortunately, I didn’t have a choice.
With the mindset of returning first thing in the morning, I left the room and headed downstairs to my bike. I considered going by the clubhouse to check in with Viper and the brothers, but I’d had a hell of a day and just wanted to go home.