Chapter 15 #2
I was denied revenge for his grievances against me. Seth noticed what I intended and quickly released me, narrowly escaping my knee. Eleos snorted and hurriedly buried his nose in his journal.
Seraphim leaped over the rock Eleos sat on and plopped down beside him, grinning brightly. She looked like a noblewoman who’d acquired a personal box to watch her favorite play.
Sighing, I grabbed my sword and stood. “How’s that?”
“Hm.” Seth frowned. “I was hoping you’d discover more of your magic. Peril encourages it, usually.”
I turned my palm over. “Were you hoping I’d disintegrate you? I wield the Empty.”
Seth opened his mouth to respond, then snapped it closed. “Ah, hm. Good point.”
Eleos snorted. “Perhaps leave study of the strange new magic to the scholar?”
“Sorry, princess,” Seth said, twirling his blade. “We’ve no choice but to train the old-fashioned way until you can parry with your eyes closed.”
Sighing, I lifted my sword and retook a defensive stance.
Training proved to be as miserable as I’d feared. Seth beat me with the blunt end of his blade, correcting errors in my stance and offering advice. Whenever I managed to parry or block his attack, he’d smile like a bright-eyed child and attack me with renewed fervor.
Most assaults ended with me lying in the dirt and him explaining what I’d done wrong. Each time, I’d hope for release and greet disappointment when he hauled me back up and instructed me to retake my stance.
Night had settled over the land by the time he finally released me. Doubling over, I caught my breath and longed for a bath.
“Not bad.” Seth commended, running a hand along his blade. “Tomorrow we can tackle something more difficult.”
“I don’t think I’m cut out for this.” I huffed.
“No one is, at first,” he flicked his hand, and the crimson sword shattered into red droplets. Grabbing the sheath from the ground, he offered it to me with a smile.
Twirling the blade slowly, I attempted to mimic his fanciful blade work. I failed spectacularly, dropping the sword instead.
Seth laughed, retrieving the sword and sheathing it for me. “Not a bad first attempt.” He offered me the side sword. “It’s yours.”
Tilting my head, I stared into his scarlet eyes, trying once again to read him. Eleos was right. Even though I wasn’t a psyche, I could see the walls he built around himself to keep everyone else out. The smile seemed fake.
“What?” He asked.
“Just trying to figure you out,” I admitted, glancing down with a frown. I didn’t have a belt to sheath my blade on.
He chuckled. “Remember what we discussed? You never won a training bout, so I don’t owe you any secrets. But,” he grinned. “You owe me a few.”
“Ugh. I lost count of how many times I fell on my ass.”
“Start with one, then.” He ran a hand under his chin, cocking his head as he looked me up and down, focusing on the features of my face. “Why did you never try to escape? With your skills and looks, couldn’t you have charmed a nobleman and taken shelter in his estate?”
“Charmed, like married him?” I asked. Nose scrunching, I studied the dirt. Why hadn’t I taken advantage of some lonely, gullible noble?
“Surely he could have paid your debts.” Seth continued.
“I guess,” I said, swallowing. Buried in my foolish heart was a yearning for. . . more. I wanted a house by a lake. A loving husband and two kids.
“Well?”
I didn’t want to tell him the truth. Stalling, I studied the silver buttons on his coat, and the detailed embroidery on his collar.
Seth knelt, bringing his face into my line of vision. “You won’t steal any of my truths, if you don’t share yours.”
Sighing, I supposed fair was fair. “I didn’t want something fake,” I said quietly. “I wanted to fall in love.”
Seth regarded me quietly. “Did you?”
“. . .no. Considering our course, I suppose I never will.”
“Hm.” He looked away. “Romance is something fools dream will fill the void in their heart. But it doesn’t.” He said shortly. “Take a rest. You’ve earned it.” Turning stiffly on his heel, he marched away.
Had I said something to offend him? No. Something in my words had drawn forth unpleasant memories.
Dusting myself off, I slid my sword into my saddlebags and pulled out my bedroll. Eleos followed me, snapping his journal closed as he reached my side. “You alright?”
“Yeah, why?”
“It looked like something he said upset you.”
“I think you have it backwards,” I said, finding a spot by the fire to roll out my mat. “And I can’t read him, still.”
Eleos watched Seth across the fire. “Neither can I. But, he’s been an ally, and it’s rude to pry. . .”
“You’re not going to try and catch him in a moment of weakness?” I guessed.
“You read my mind.” He said, wearing a little half-smile. “Some people bury their heart not to hide it from others, but to shield themselves from reliving the pain.”
He was right. Maybe the secrets this group kept were not born of malice or shame, but pain. Maybe we were all just broken inside.
* * *
The stars hid behind a blanket of clouds tonight. I watched the gloomy sky, searching for a hint of light behind the black canvas. Myriad thoughts raced through my head, keeping my eyes open and awake.
Sitting up, I glanced around our camp. Percy had taken the first watch, and I’d been assigned the last. A dim lantern glowed in the distance, where he kept vigil over the mountain pass. Dragging myself from the sleeping roll, I pulled a cloak around my shoulders and wandered toward the light.
Soft lute twangs reached my ears, a gentle lullaby. Perched on a rock, Percy idly strummed a song while staring forward into the night, his white hair hanging into his eyes. Noticing me, he quickly brushed back his hair and smiled.
“Aethra. What are you doing up?”
“Can’t sleep,” I said, sitting beside him. “What are you playing?”
“A song my mother liked.” He set the lute aside. “She used to sing me to sleep with it.”
Percy had changed from his tattered tunic into equally garish garb. A ridiculous V cut his tunic in half, cinched by his colorful patchwork sash. There must’ve been a story behind it for him to wear it so often.
“Did she make you that?” I asked, nodding at the sash.
“Yes.” He sat forward eagerly. “It was originally a doublet. My first proper bard outfit.” Nostalgia warmed his eyes. “I was six, in case you were curious.”
“She must have been proud.” Folding my arms, I tucked myself into my cloak. “How did you and Seth meet, anyhow?”
“Chance.” He crossed a leg over the other. “He needed information from the town guard. Of all the men he could’ve chatted up, fate chose me.”
“I take it he was asking about a target?”
“One I didn’t much like. I ended up helping him.
” He leaned back, watching the stars. “The old codger had it coming. Some madams treat their girls like people. Others, like refuse.” Percy’s head snapped back down.
“Gloomy tales won’t help you sleep. The story of how he abandoned me is funny, in hindsight. ”
Shifting, I clasped my hands in my lap. “Seth mentioned that. He said you should’ve stayed home. That he was hoping you’d turn back.”
“Ah. . .” Percy’s brows fell. “He’s probably right. But there was nothing for me at home but despair, and I’ve never much liked songs that sound like it.”
“Do you have a family?”
“A mother and a father.” He chuckled. “Not the wife and children you’re thinking of.” Pausing, he sighed heavily. “You’re trying to figure out what Seth meant, aren’t you? I have an illness. There’s no cure.”
“Oh,” I said, surprised. “Do you mean the taint?”
“No.” He breathed. “No, that’s a different story entirely.”
“Is it bad? You seem alright.”
“Most days, I am. It’s not at its worst, yet.” He explained, almost cheerfully. “Every year, I feel a little weaker. Every month, my joints stiffen a little more. Eventually, they’ll stop working. Most people don’t live long after that.”
I sat silently, unsure what to say.
“It developed around the time I met Seth. When he learned of my ailment, he tried to get rid of me.” Percy huffed, offended. “He wanted to keep me safe. To prolong my life. But who gets to decide that but me?”
“Is that why you agreed to join Seraphim?”
“Isn’t it grand?” He grinned. “I can’t think of anything better: a mission worth dying for, that’ll claim me before I’m spent.
” Sorrow washed over his feigned joy. “There’s no other point to living a life with a deadline.
No point in waiting for a slow death. At least now I can go out on my own terms.”
“I. . .” Floundering for words, I offered only stillness.
“It’s okay,” Percy said gently, meeting my eyes. “Most people don’t know what to say. I wouldn’t either. We’re all living on borrowed time now. Might as well enjoy the ride, together, no?”
“You’re right. We should.” I glanced away. No wonder he’d so readily offered himself as the sacrifice.
Guilt tore through my heart. I’d had the gall to feel sorry for myself, yet here was a man who was condemned to an early death through nothing more than a stroke of ill luck. I wanted to say something. But what words would suffice?
“Hey,” Percy took my hand. “It’s okay. Really. The last thing I want is for people to feel bad for me. I’m at peace with it. Really.”
He was lying. The truth was written on his face, plain as day. Fear flickered in his eyes, regret creased his brow, and sorrow tugged at his lips. I squeezed his hand, trying to offer what little comfort I could.
Releasing my hand, Percy picked up his lute. “Are you sure you don’t want that lullaby?”
“And distract you from your vigil?” I asked playfully.
“I owe you for saving my life, don’t I?”
“The way I see it, you saved ours.”
“Then that, my dear,” he strummed a happy chord, “makes us even. Now, go get some sleep. Eleos will kill me if I keep you up.”
Nodding, I stood and returned to my bedroll, idly playing with the strings of my cloak. Sitting on my mat, I stared into the night, more awake than I’d been before.
Life was unfair to those who deserved joy, and fortune was spilled on those who didn’t. For some reason, the thought made me burn with fury.