Chapter 21 #2
“I believed there was magic connected to the Empty,” He lowered his voice so the guards couldn’t hear. “But I think the gods either never existed or abandoned us.”
I couldn’t claim to be pious, but I’d always believed in the gods. “Why?”
“Because gods worth worshiping wouldn’t let. . .” He trailed off, abruptly changing tone. “I came here often in my youth. It’s nostalgic to be back.”
Sitting back, I glanced at the guards. Speaking of heresy was probably a bad move, right about now. “It’s beautiful.”
Unripe fruit hung from the trees, their branches flecked with pastel flowers. Neatly trimmed grass grew around staggered stone pathways, circling fountains made of natural piled stones. I tucked my hands between my legs, resisting the urge to pluck the lilies growing around the bench.
They might be holy, after all.
“So,” I gripped the edge of the bench and leaned forward. “You’re the Grand Cleric’s son?”
“Adopted son .” He corrected. “I was left at the temple steps.”
“Oh.” I breathed. The Guild always left noble bastards on temple doorsteps. Doctrine required them to take in the child and raise it as a nameless disciple.
“My sister was his blood daughter.” Eleos continued, closing his eyes as the breeze swept over us.
“You’re still hiding a lot from me,” I said.
“I know. There’s a lot in my past. I’ve never shared it with anyone before.” His eyes snapped open, and he quickly took my hand and released it. When he next spoke, it was within the safety of my thoughts. “I can find a chance to speak with the others tonight. But it might be my only chance.”
“You want to plan an escape?” I asked.
“I know my Father. He’s reeling.” Eleos thought back, pretending to be admiring the scenery. “None of them are prepared for the end. Nobody thinks it will happen in their lifetime. I suspect the Heireia will win out, and you will be driven into the Empty, to ‘prove’ yourself.”
“But I can survive-”
“You can,” He agreed. “But we have a mission, and we’re running out of time. We cannot be tied down here, and,” he glanced at me, “I doubt they’ll be so kind to the others when their identities are discovered.”
I rolled my tongue in my mouth, standing. “A daring escape it is, then.” Knitting my fingers behind my back, I strolled to the fountain and peered into the water. “My talents will be of little help. This might be something better suited for Percy and Seth.”
“You do me a disservice.” Eleos thought, humored. “I can hear all these guards’ thoughts.”
“. . .What are they thinking?”
“They’re terrified. They hope—and pray—you’re false.”
Raising my head, I stared at the shorter of the two guards, a young woman whose face I couldn’t see. She stared back. Even with her face concealed, I could read her distress: her hand danced on the hilt of her blade, she bounced nervously on her heels.
Was she wondering the same thing I was? Had the gods abandoned us?
Were we truly alone in this wretched world?
Turning away, I stared into the water. “Tell Seth not to hurt them.”
“I thought our vigilante didn’t hurt innocents?” Eleos rose and joined me by the pond, switching to speaking aloud. “My sister used to drag me from that very bench, close my books, and force me to train with her.”
“Really?” I asked, smiling.
“She wanted to be a temple knight, not a priestess.” He confirmed, smiling at her memory.
“And you’ve always been a bookworm?
“I prefer to call myself an academic.”
I chuckled, dropping my arms. Our hands brushed. He reached back, running a finger across the back of my hand before retracting his arm.
Nerves fluttered in my heart as I remembered Percy’s words: Eleos would want to be asked to court in a beloved spot. The setting sun dipped behind the trees, spilling evening light across the fountain, and dousing the garden in romantic light.
I’d miss my chance if I didn’t leap at it now, good timing be damned.
“Um,” My voice cracked, and I snapped my mouth closed.
Raising an eyebrow, Eleos turned to look at me. “Yes?”
Swallowing, I tried to summon my courage. What if he said no? What if everything I wanted to say came out all wrong? Lost in his soft green eyes, I rehearsed the words I wanted to say, but couldn’t voice them.
“Can’t you,” I croaked, “read my mind?”
“I try not to, Lady Aethra.” He reminded me, stepping back. “We were only allowed a moment’s respite. The guards are getting restless.” He touched my wrist. “We should go.”
The moment flew over my head and landed in the dirt behind me, squandered. Nodding my head absently, I followed him down the stone path back to the Temple’s doors. Maybe that hadn’t been the best time, anyway, what with guards staring daggers at our backs.
Lowering my gaze, I returned to the guest quarters I’d been assigned, though perhaps ‘confined to’ was a more apt description. Eleos held the door open for me while the guards took up station on either side of the hall.
I furrowed my brow when Eleos entered and closed the door behind him. “Are you supposed to be in here with me?”
“Yes.” He said, approaching the bed, “I’m to serve you, remember? That includes preparing your chambers and ensuring your comfort.”
Chortling, I followed him to the edge of the bed, watching him fold down the quilt. “So I can ask anything of you?”
He sighed heavily. “Yes. What would you have of me, Lady Aethra?”
Bouncing on my heels, I glanced around the room, thinking. “Can you put a kettle on the stove?”
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” He dutifully grabbed the kettle from the mantle and hung it over the fire. “What did I do to deserve that?”
“Kept secrets from me,” I said, turning. “Can you unbind my hair? It takes forever when I do it myself.”
“Anything for you, Lady Aethra,” he said politely.
Grinning, I exhaled as he gently ran his fingers through my hair, carefully loosening the braids and pulling out their pins. Shivers ran through my spine with every touch.
When my hair fell loose around my shoulders, I spun around, my face a breath from his. “Do you want to stay the night?”
“I wouldn’t be allowed.” He said quietly, glancing at the door.
“Not even for a little while?” I asked, tilting my head up, bringing our lips a whisper apart.
Eleos stiffened and stepped back.
“Sorry,” I blurted out, “I meant to, in the garden. . .”
“Meant to what?”
“I. . .” turning red, I swept my hair behind my ear and looked down.
“I’ve never had anyone I could really trust, and you said you’ve been alone, and.
. .” Gathering myself, I raised my head.
“I want to know you. To trust you. And I figured maybe you wanted it done formally, so. . . I’m trying to court you. ”
None of it came out right. As the jumble of words fell from my mouth, Eleos’ smile faded. Casting his eyes away, he said two simple words.
Two words that shattered my heart.
“I’m not.”
Stunned, I froze, staring at the ground as he closed the curtains and placed a hand on the doorknob.
“Do you need anything else, Lady Aethra?” Eleos asked.
“No,” I muttered.
His voice chimed in my thoughts. “Stay awake tonight. I’m going to inform the others.”
Nodding, I kept my gaze on the floor, listening to him exit and walk down the hall. Wringing my hands together, I lifted my head and approached the fire, watching the water in the kettle slowly rise to a boil.
Pouring myself a mug of tea, I sat on the edge of the bed and watched the swirling herbs.
Gods, I felt like an idiot. Pain thrashed in my chest as I choked back the tea.
Why had Eleos been so kind to me? Why had he held me that night if not because. . .
I bit my lip and looked away. Ainwir had taken in a girl of eleven and raised her for seven years. Seven long years. And for what? To toss her by the wayside, his troubles dumped on my head.
I’d been betrayed once before, and had learned nothing from Ainwir’s final lesson.
I was truly alone in this world.
An unlovable, wretched girl.