Chapter 23
Knights had chased us into Serifos, and now out of Therapne. If the two groups met up, we’d have a veritable army at our heels. Should they corner us in Cynthus before we could depart for Duath Nun?
No plan existed that could save us from the gallows.
Straying away from our camp, I stood on the edge of a bluff, overlooking the sea.
I’d never seen the sea before. Most people feared it.
The still water resting at the bottom of the Empty colored our nightmares.
Our cities were built upon channels, a reminder of how the Maiden carried us to safety across the still sea, a reminder we had the power to conquer it.
The setting sun sparkled on the waters, coloring them a gorgeous shade of deep orange. Endless waves crashed against the rocks below, ever moving. I was fascinated by the surges, wondering what propelled them and from where they came.
Seraphim touched my shoulder, drawing me from my thoughts. “We can’t stop for long. Take a breather, grab something to eat. Once the horses have had time to rest, we’re moving on.”
I nodded blearily. Hunger didn’t trouble me, though I hadn’t eaten today. I could hear Percy and Eleos talking behind me, distant murmurs I couldn’t make out. Footsteps approached, and I looked up to see Seth standing at my side, dagger pressed into his palm.
Blood welled on his skin. “We have time to train,” he said. “And considering the circumstances, you need to learn. Quickly.”
Training sounded like a fantastic way to take my mind off everything.
Off Eleos.
Straining not to glance at the scholar, I drew my side sword from its scabbard and followed Seth to an empty field a few paces from the shore.
Mind blank, I listened to his instructions and followed his orders, copying his movements as I practiced swings and thrusts. I focused only on the man and his blade, pretending they were soldiers come to execute me for heresy.
Seth’s blade clashed against mine, and he attempted to disarm me. I managed to keep my grip on the hilt and stepped back, anticipating his next attack.
But he lowered his blade. “Are you alright, princess?” He asked quietly.
“Yes,” I said stiffly.
“You’re focusing for once. A little too intently.” He stepped closer. “Did something happen? You seemed fine before our . . . unceremonious capture.”
“How would you know?” I spat, more harshly than intended. “You were avoiding me.”
“I wasn’t—”
“Yes, you were. Even Percy noticed.” Lowering my sword, I exhaled. “Then you almost get yourself killed trying to save me, and then you yell at me during our escape. Do you have a problem with me, or not?”
Seth glanced away. “I’m just trying to give you space. I can tell something is brewing between you and Eleos.”
The irony of his words forced a short chuckle from my lips. Was it relief I felt, to know others had been under the same delusions as I?
“Oh,” Seth muttered, glancing behind me, where Eleos and Percy fed the horses. “I’m . . . quite wrong, aren’t I?”
“I asked him to court. He said no,” I said, sheathing my blade. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Did I not tell you romance was a fool’s game?” He said.
Lowering my head, I reluctantly agreed. I’d caught glimpses of real love that others shared, whether romantic or familial. But it would never be mine.
“Don’t beat yourself up over it,” Seth said softly. “The kid clearly cares about you. Some of us have known loss, and are . . . reluctant to lose anything again. Maybe that’s true for him.”
“Maybe,” I said, turning and walking away. Following the sea breeze, I returned to the bluff.
Whisper followed me, tail thumping against my leg as he peered up at me. Unable to resist his big brown eyes, I reached down and ran my hand over his fur.
Someone marched toward me. I whirled around, intending to tell Seth to go away, but instead found Seraphim standing behind me, a frown etched on her face.
“I hope you’ll forgive me,” she said. “I listened in.”
Embarrassed, I looked down, but Seraphim gently tilted my chin back up.
“It’s true. Love is a fool’s game.” She said, staring into the sea. “Some think it makes you whole, but it doesn’t. It creates a new warmth, nestled deep in your breast. And losing it rips a hole of its own. Death and parting are inevitable. Who but fools would pursue it nonetheless?”
“Are you saying it’s not worth it?” I asked.
“No, dear. The opposite.” Seraphim lowered her hand and kneeled, plucking a dandelion from the bluff. “What do you want to see, when you look back, at the end?”
I blinked, watching the waves. In my dreams, I saw a house, a family. But it was a dream, faded, foggy. What did I want to see with my waking eyes?
“I don’t know,” I admitted.
“Not this, I’d imagine.” Seraphim turned, twirling the flower between her fingers.
“Not a life enslaved to the Guild. Not one full of regrets, of emptiness.” She raised the flower to her lips, blowing its petals across the water.
“There will always be pain along the path. But I would not trade my time with her for anything. Nor would I undo my regrets, or forge a different course. This is my life. What, when all fades to naught, I can claim made me Seraphim.”
Touching the flower, I repeated her words in my head, deciding if I felt the same.
She touched my cheek. “The pain of today will not define tomorrow. It will still come.” Dropping her hand, she tilted her head. “C’mon. You should get something to eat before we move on.”
Nodding, I watched her walk away, stealing a few more moments by the shore. What did I want to see, when I looked back, at the end?
My life had been meaningless, but it needn’t remain that way. We walked toward oblivion, wielding magic that seemed to cost my very life. My end was inevitable, and it was coming soon.
But I could go out with purpose. I could, at the very least, help Eleos find the cure for this world’s decay, even if I could not stop it myself.
A shadow fell over me, and I looked up to see Seth standing at my side. Burying his hands in his pockets, he pulled out the strange little knife he’d bought at Red Bluff Outpost.
I no longer wanted him gone. Seraphim’s words had blanketed me in a sense of finality. Of solace.
“You spend a great deal of time worrying,” Seth said, fishing a stick from his other pocket. “What you need is a hobby. We can’t fill all the idle hours with training.”
“I never had time for hobbies,” I said, watching him with interest.
“Well, now you do. Hours of camp,” He studied the stick and scraped the little knife along it. “Night watches. Long rides.” The knife dragged down the wood again, peeling off the bark. “It’ll help calm you on days like these.”
“You carve wood?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I whittle,” he corrected, shrugging. “It gives the hands something to do.”
Folding my arms tightly, I watched the waves. “I have no idea what I like. As a child, my every moment was focused on surviving, and as an adult, I spent all day working.”
“Hm.” Lowering his knife, Seth studied my face. “I should get you a book, next time I get a chance.”
“A book?”
“A story, an epic. A knight and his princess falling in love. You could use an escape from your dreary life.”
Cocking my head, I considered his suggestion. Would I enjoy slipping into a dream?
Every night in my tiny hovel, I’d drift off, imagining the house by the lake and the loving husband I’d never have.
Maybe he was right.
“I’d like that,” I said.
“Your wish is my command,” Seth said with a smile.
“Will you show me what you’re whittling when it’s done?”
“Mhm. I have big plans for this little stick,” he nudged me. “We should get ready to leave.”
Swallowing my pain, I turned from the shore and returned to the others.
Percy hovered behind Eleos as he prepared the mounts, flinching every time Eleos yanked a strap in anger.
Watching them curiously, I grabbed Athena’s reins and fished through my bags for a hunk of dried meat.
Tossing it onto the ground, I smiled as Whisper happily snapped it up.
Eleos tightened his saddle and stepped away, jaw tightly set. “That’s so typical. Of course, they’d rather keep the status quo than lift a finger and do something.”
“Are you at least glad?” Percy asked. “That he wanted you to escape?”
Realizing they were talking about the Grand Cleric, I listened in.
“No.” Eleos ran a hand through his hair. “He was going to kill Aethra. He’s as much of a coward as I remember.”
Seth tossed Percy a fresh waterskin. “Do you think dear old dad will spare you?”
“No.” Percy angrily shook out his hat. “My father despised everything you stood for, remember? He’s loyal to a fault, and thinks peace means no one’s stirring the pot.”
Seraphim’s head sharply whipped around, and I followed her gaze. A few silhouettes flecked the distant shore—men on horseback.
“Time to go,” Seraphim announced, driving her heels into her horse and riding south.
Mounting Athena, I directed her to follow. A tiny hint of pride warmed my breast; I’d climbed into the saddle and found my balance without aid. Perhaps I could learn to be of use, after all.
I kept pace with Seraphim as we diverted from the shore and dove into the trees. “You mentioned using the Guild to enter the city.”
Seraphim nodded. “Every city has smuggling routes. We can enter using one, and remain unseen until my brother shelters us.”
“And,” Percy called, leaning forward in the saddle, “What then? The Therapnens will follow us to Cynthus. Are we not to step foot outside?”
“Maybe not,” Seraphim said. “We’ll have to play it by ear, once we arrive.”
I pursed my lips, thinking. “The Guild worked with that masked nobleman. They abandoned the tunnel so we could leave unfettered and walk right into his trap. What if the Cynthus Guild are enemies, too?”
“We play it by ear,” Seraphim repeated.
“I’ll approach them, then,” I said. “The rest of you remain out of sight. Once I broker a deal for safe passage into the city, I’ll come get you.”
“What?” Seth barked. “You’re not going alone. I’m coming with you.”
“Don’t they know your face?”
“Maybe? I’m a beloved client, if anything. They fed me most of my information.”
Seraphim leaned toward me. “Take him. You’re not going alone.”
“Alright, mother,” I muttered, and she smiled.
Twisting in the saddle, I watched the trees behind us, searching for signs the search party had seen us. My gaze swept over Eleos, and I noticed him pull out his journal and flip through the pages, occasionally glancing up to guide his horse.
Swallowing, I looked down. He was acting perfectly normal, like nothing was wrong. The knife in my heart twisted deeper.
“Hey,” Seth pulled his horse along mine. “I got something for you.”
“Where?” I asked. “In Therapne?”
“Mhm.” He leaned over, rifling through his saddlebags. “Well, I stole it.” Flipping the bags closed, he offered me a bundle of cloth.
Keeping one hand firmly on the saddle, I took the strange bundle of brown fabric. “Why does this worry me?”
“It’s pants.”
Flicking my wrist, I shook out the fabric. Sure enough, it was pants: plain leggings someone might wear under robes.
Realization dawned on me. “Did you steal a priest’s pants?”
“Yes,” Seth admitted. “I took it from his wardrobe. They detained us in someone’s quarters.”
Percy rode up to Seth’s other side. “Is that what you were rifling around for?”
“She needed pants.” Seth shrugged. “I found some.”
Laughing, I rolled them back up and stuffed them into my bags. “How fitting, for my first pair to be filched from a priest.”
Seth grinned at me with a radiant, mischievous smile. Rubbing his nose, Percy chuckled with me. For the first time, I felt a sense of camaraderie, like I was among people I could trust.
With friends, if not anything more.
“Thanks, Seth.” I shook my head.
“Anything for you, princess.” Taking my hand, he gingerly kissed it and winked at me.
His hand lingered on mine, thumb caressing my palm. I glanced down, reminding myself I knew nothing. If I had mistaken Eleos’ intentions, I couldn’t imagine how wrong I was about Seth.
Dropping my hand, Seth turned to Percy. Focusing on the path ahead, I dragged in a long breath.
We were nearly at the end.