Chapter 21
Emmy
“Right, spill. Immediately.”
Sloane doesn’t even wait for me to shut the front door before launching into interrogation mode.
She’s curled up on the sofa under a blanket, canned cocktail in hand, half-watching a re-run of The Great British Bake Off.
The second I step inside, she sits bolt upright and jabs an accusatory finger in my direction.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I say sweetly, shrugging my coat off and hanging it up.
“Ha! You don’t walk in here at 11pm with freshly washed hair unless there’s a story, so spill. Right now.” She raises her eyebrows and looks pointedly at me, waiting.
“Ok, fine. I may… have just had the best sex of my life.” I reply, a grin splitting my face.
“YES! YES GIRL! YOU QUEEN!” Sloane leaps off the sofa and runs at me, nearly knocking me over with the force of her hug. “Tell me everything.”
“Well, it all started with a kiss, then we went back to his place and he basically made me see God with his tongue.” Sloane swoons as I say it, faking a full faint that lands her on the floor as I laugh.
“Then we had sex and I came again, then we had a shower together and I came home. End of story!”
She’s absolutely beaming at me as she gets back up and tugs me over to the sofa. I drop down in the other corner and lean back into the cushions. I’m exhausted but I’m also wired. I feel like I could simultaneously climb a mountain and sleep for a week.
“And who’s this mystery man? Someone from Salt?”
I smirk. “You could say that.”
“Oh, he DIDN’T. After shutting you out in the cold, Luke came grovelling at your feet?”
“I’m not sure I’d call it grovelling but it was like something snapped inside him.
He’s breaking all his rules, Sloane. I am sure he’s probably freaking out about Nick as we speak.
But it’s just sex and my sex life is none of my brother’s business so I don’t see the problem.
We’re both adults. Consenting adults who have fucking incredible chemistry in bed together. ” I can’t stop grinning.
“Well, here’s to great sex and multiple orgasms. It’s about damn time.”
“Amen to that,” I reply.
“So, what happens next? Was tonight a one-off or is he on board with The List?” She raises her eyebrows at me and cocks her head expectantly.
“I think he’s on board with The List,” I reply, my mouth twisting into a smile I can’t hold back.
“Well, if I know anything about that man, you’re in for a real treat. He’s performed on the stage a couple of times, you know?”
“The stage? At Salt?” I laugh, but it comes out thin.
“Yep. He’s a big daddy dom at heart. The man’s an artist with ropes. His Shibari skills are off the charts.” She gives a slightly dreamy sigh as my stomach flips over. I blink and try to hide my sudden discomfort.
A knot of unease twists in my stomach. Ropes? Performances? Stunning, confident women who know exactly what they’re doing? I swallow.
“Wow,” I manage, meekly, hoping Sloane doesn’t notice how quickly I’ve deflated.
“He’s the owner of a sex club babe, of course he’s going to have a very specific set of skills and experiences,” she says, spotting my minor internal meltdown.
“Of course,” I reply, but the high I was riding mere moments ago is being washed out by the insidious creep of doubt.
“He’ll be great for you, darling. He’ll fuck Colin right out of your system. And he famously doesn’t do relationships so you don’t need to worry – he’ll be at your beck and call whenever you want to tick something off the list.”
I manage a weak smile and a nod. This is exactly what I signed up for, so why does my stomach feel like it’s been filled with stones?
“I’m going to head to bed,” I say with a yawn and she blows me a kiss as she puts Bake Off back on.
“I’m really happy for you babe,” she says as I walk to my room. I blow a kiss back and she snatches it out of the air and presses it to her mouth with a grin.
It’s only later, once I’m alone in bed, that the fear settles under my skin. What if I’m too vanilla for him? What if he loses interest in me? And why does the idea of him performing on stage with stunning sex goddesses make me feel like I want to hurl?
Just as I close my eyes, my phone vibrates on the bedside table. It’s a message from Luke.
Luke
Did you get home safely?
Yes, all tucked up in bed now. Thanks for a great night!
Luke
Great. Glad you’re safe. Speak soon, ok? Night.
There’s a pause, then:
Luke
xx
xx
I lay my head back on the pillow. Am I being an idiot?
Nick needs Luke in his life. He’s his anchor.
Am I playing a dangerous game by demanding a piece of him for myself?
I blow out a breath, the worries flittering around my brain now that the afterglow of our evening has dissipated.
In the harsh light of day, is this really a good idea?
The self-doubt swirls around me but as I take myself back to the moment where Luke just held me in the shower, I fall asleep with a smile on my face. I’ll deal with the guilt tomorrow.