Chapter Nine
Bridger hadn’t texted her back.
Kit had checked her phone thirty times at least over that shift.
She’d pulled in good pay for the night, over three-hundred dollars, and that was good for a random Sunday night.
This town was growing on her, and not just for its location far away from the McIver Pack, but the people here were different than in her hometown.
They were generous, and friendly with werewolves for the most part.
At least what she’d seen at The Mark. She liked her boss there, and truth be told, she liked the idea of running into Bridger from time to time in town.
Clearly, they weren’t anything.
He’d left her on read.
All. Night.
She was done. She’d stayed awake all night, again, and taken stock of how much this entire situation had affected her.
She’d gone into the matchmaking with the best intentions.
She’d done everything just as her matchmaker, Lauren, had advised.
She’d gone all in. She’d moved her entire life around for the chance at happiness, and it hadn’t panned out.
She felt so stupid. So silly.
She had called Lauren and explained her side of things and how it had felt.
Lauren had already talked to the Real Bridger, so she was understanding of the situation immediately.
She was already putting together a plan to keep this from happening to anyone else in the future.
There would be more hoops to jump through for the couples in order to enter into an arranged pairing contract.
She’d apologized so many times, but it wasn’t Lauren’s fault. It wasn’t Bridger’s either. It was Kit’s for putting her faith in anything. Nothing had ever just worked out for her. What on earth had made her think this would be any different?
Back to the drawing board.
She zipped up her duffel bag and looked around the hotel room.
Her mistake had been in losing herself with Bridger.
She’d lost her mind and let him touch not only her body, but her soul.
She could feel it. The wolf could feel it.
He was special, and that would make it harder to separate her heart from him.
If he’d just remained the asshole she’d met at his house, she could’ve already been back in Alabama and chocking this all up to a mistake.
But now her heart was involved. Her body would probably always crave his.
This sucked.
She pushed open the hotel door and pulled off the ‘privacy please’ sign she’d left hanging on the door handle, so housekeeping would know she had checked out of here.
She let the door click closed behind her and made her way to the elevator.
The ding of each floor as she traveled down that elevator shaft was such an echoing, lonely sound. She really liked Coeur d’Alene. Her feelings about this place would always be so mixed when she remembered it. She felt like there would always be a sense of longing, and unfinished business here.
Ding. The elevator landed on the bottom floor and the doors opened. She smiled at a mom and young child combo that were getting in. They were chattering away, both dressed in swimsuits. They must’ve been headed back to their room after some fun at the pool. Idaho sure was beautiful in the summer.
She adjusted her duffel bag on her shoulder and aimed for her car.
A familiar truck was parked there. Kit froze.
Bridger stood leaning against his tailgate, gold eyes on her. Beside him was an official looking woman in a pantsuit, holding a folder. The notary, she would guess.
Kit inhaled deeply, trying to work her way through the rush of emotions that consumed her. Anger, hurt, acceptance. Understanding.
Bridger wasn’t hers. He was never going to be hers. That man wasn’t meant for her, and they had both been sucked into a trick. She understood needing to tie up the loose ends and sign the paperwork before she left town.
That man was still mated to a ghost, and she couldn’t compete with that.
She nodded. “Okay,” she murmured.
She approached them slowly, eyes on the notary, who introduced herself as Maryanne Hayward.
Kit set her duffle bag down on the ground and avoided looking at Bridger.
He smelled like cologne and wolf this morning.
His tailgate was down, and there were two coffees sitting on it.
One looked like the iced coffee he’d brought her yesterday.
“I’m sorry,” he said low as Maryanne pulled the paperwork from the folder and organized them on the tailgate.
“Don’t be,” Kit clipped out. “This is right.”
“No,” he said quietly, sidling up beside her. “I mean for not messaging last night.”
“Bridger, it’s fine. This is what it is. You’re hot and cold, and this is right. We should go our separate ways.”
“I brought you coff—”
“I don’t want it,” she interrupted, finally looking up at him.
He wore his hat backwards. His gold eyes were sparking with intensity, and something more that she couldn’t understand. His beard was getting thicker already.
He was, hands down, the most handsome man she’d ever laid eyes on. But he was a dead end, and her life had to move forward. She had to grow. She had to improve. She had to make sound decisions and dig her way out of the hole she’d buried herself in.
Bridger was an anchor, not a shovel.
“I can’t do the hot and cold,” she whispered. “I can’t.”
He inhaled deeply and nodded.
She forced a smile and bumped his shoulder. “I had fun there for a little while, and I’m thankful for parts of this.”
“What parts?” he asked, his voice gritty.
“I know better what I want now.”
“What do you want?” he asked.
Maryanne told them, “Okay, I’m all ready for you to sign.”
Kit offered Bridger a polite smile and stepped around him, took the pen from Maryanne’s hand, and leaned over the tailgate to sign where she was supposed to.
“What do you want?” he asked again, standing beside her as she signed in three places.
“Your turn,” Maryanne said, offering Bridger a pen.
He took Kit’s place in front of the paperwork, but he seemed distracted. “Kit,” he said.
“Please,” she whispered. “Just end it. I don’t want to suffer.”
“What do you want?” he asked in a whisper. There was a desperation in his eyes she didn’t understand.
“I want someone with chemistry like we have, but I want to be the only one he sees. I want someone who will make me better, not drag me into a bad pattern. I’ve done that before.
I want steady now. I want to know my place beside a man.
I don’t want to compete with someone I know is better than me in every way—”
“Kit—”
“No, Bridger. You had all day yesterday to text me back and talk about whatever you want to talk about. All day and all night. I’ve barely slept since I’ve been in Coeur d’Alene, and it’s because you are putting my head on a rollercoaster I can’t maintain long term. Does that make sense?”
Bridger pursed his lips.
“Look, I came here with clear intentions, and you weren’t the person I thought you were.
It’s not your fault. I was manipulated, and you were blindsided, and this was never going to work.
I understand that now. But fuck, Bridger, I had fun in moments with you.
I truly did. It was this white-hot flash in a pan of emotion when I was with you, but then it was painful when I wasn’t with you.
I can’t imagine maintaining that push and pull long term.
You will ruin me. You aren’t ready yet.”
“Kit, I’ve been thinking—”
“Bridger, you aren’t ready. You said so yourself.
I feel it. My animal feels it. You show me affection and then you hate yourself for it, and it is only a matter of time before you hate me for it too.
Amelia has you still, and maybe she always will.
And you know what? That’s okay. No one has a right to rush you through mourning a loss like that.
She was the one for you. You were the one for her.
I want that too. I want to be the one someday for someone too.
Not just the leftover option to make you forget your problems for an hour or two at a time.
I want to be more. Sign the paperwork and we can both be free. ”
He got quiet, searching her eyes for a few seconds before he leaned over the paperwork and signed where he was supposed to sign. The notary signed quickly after that and stamped it, and Kit uploaded each page into the document scanner portion of her notes app on her phone. She sent them to Lauren.
And it was done.
She forced a smile and said goodbye to Maryanne and offered her hand for a shake to Bridger.
He looked at it. His eyes were glowing so brightly right now. Slowly, he grasped her hand and shook it.
“You shook up a lot inside of me,” he rumbled.
“We feisty ones will do that.”
He huffed a laugh and pulled her in, hugged her tightly against his chest. She could feel his heart beating against her cheek.
Bridger rested his cheek on top of her head and sighed. “I haven’t felt this alive since…you know…”
“You’ve barely even seen the tip of the iceberg with me, mister.”
“Mister?” he said in that sexy gritty voice of his.
Feeling that unavoidable tug of his body to hers, she forced herself to ease out of his hug. “You are messing with my wolf.”
“Am I now?” he asked, head cocked as he stared at her.
“You know you are.” She picked up her duffel bag and opened the back door to her car. “You will always be my favorite fuck.”
A single laugh belted out from him. “Oh yeah?”
“Yep. You’re an animal in the sack. It’s been a wild ride.”
“Are you going back on the matchmaking site.”
“Yep. I already told Lauren to reactivate my file. It’ll go live as soon as the paperwork is recorded. I’m off to find a mate,” she clipped out, trying to hide the hurt in her tone. Her throat was getting thick, so she knew it was time to leave. She wanted to do this strong.
“You know you could just find a mate the old-fashioned way, right? Meet someone nice. Go out on dates…”