6. Eshe #3
We both walked through the quiet tavern and sat at one of the corner tables where no one could hear our squabble.
“How are you?” I asked, peering over the coffee that the innkeeper had brought over.
Salazar sighed. “Worried. Worried and tired.”
My lips twitched. “I didn’t ask you to follow me here. I knew there was a fifty-fifty chance, but how could you not go back to little Tarrie and Bea?”
“How could you leave me—us?” Salazar threw the question back at me.
My jaw tightened. “Because I needed to do this for my family.”
“Tarrie has Bea, unfortunately, she’s used to me not being around for work, you know that,” he said with a deep sigh.
“What did I tell you about starting a new family? A family that loves and cares for you? Revenge is never the answer. I thought I taught you better than this. Learn from history. Learn from others. Don’t do whatever it is you’re thinking, Eshe. ”
“Mara,” I corrected him, refraining from rolling my eyes at how petty I was being.
Salazar gave me a blank stare.
I gave him one back.
“What?”
“Did you hear what I said?” he asked.
“I did, and I will not listen to you. It’s my choice. I’m not doing any of this for myself, to make myself feel better or to feel like I’m righting my family—no. I’m doing this because it must be done. For them. Not for me. They deserve that.”
Salazar’s throat moved.
“Come on, Salazar. You couldn’t possibly have thought I would change my mind after all this time, did you?”
He shrugged and stared emptily at the table. “I hoped.”
“There is no hope for me. I signed my death with God eight years ago. When they died…I died.”
Salazar slid his soft brown eyes to me. “I know how this ends… Revenge… It’s never what it seems. And how do you know it’s they who killed your family? It could’ve been the man currently ruling your kingdom right now.”
My body winced. “Everyone knows they killed my family.” I tried to brush away the feeling of shame and guilt that washed over my body.
I knew I didn’t feel the allegiance that I should feel toward my people.
The thing was, I wasn’t raised to feel an attachment to my family’s people—to my people.
I was raised to expect that ‘my kingdom’ would be my husband’s…
The kingdom of Tehara. The country I was in.
My eyes flitted over the crowd of people in the tavern.
Salazar shook his head, and his shoulders caved in for a moment. “I want to help you, Eshe…but this isn’t the way.”
An idea slowly wove itself into my mind, and the rest of his words vanished. “Are you not going to let this go, Salazar?”
He met my eyes. “No, I’ll do what I can to make sure you come home with me safely.”
Nothing sounded as good as being home with his family, eating noodles, and laughing over card games.
I took a deep breath. “Then help me.”
The tavern went quiet while Salazar’s brows twitched low. “How can I?”
“I’ll take care of my end, but why don’t you go to Zyriah and find information on this new ruler. I want to know what he is doing to my country, if I need to step in—
“I will do no such thing,” Salazar exclaimed. “I’m too old—”
“Salazar, don’t give me that bullshit. You still run ten-mile mornings, and your stomach looks as if it belongs on a statue. You’re perfectly capable of doing anything, and you’ve always reminded me of that growing up. It’s all in the mind, isn’t it?”
He let out a deep sigh and shook his head. “This would be dangerous.”
“Hold on, I’m not asking you to do anything that would be dangerous.
I wouldn’t do that to little Tarrie. Just information.
Information isn’t dangerous! It’s not like I’m asking you to kill—listen, I want to know: are the people safe?
Who is ruling? Where did he come from?” I could tell it was working.
He was thinking. “When you do go…” I treaded carefully.
“Salazar, I need you to be really honest with me. Swear to—”
“I swear I will tell you the truth about this new ruler.” Salazar rolled his eyes, and for his old age, it still made my heart giggle a little. “But what if he’s the—”
“He’s not.” I leaned back in the chair and crossed my arms. “The Navons were part of this, not the rulers of Zyriah. I heard what I heard that night.” Taking a deep breath, I continued, “I can’t be in two places.
Will you help me and find out what you can?
” I tried to mentally force him to accept my proposal, like he taught me about manifestation.
I imagined in a few seconds him agreeing and letting me go.
“Then I can have confidence in knowing that I’ve done everything I can for my family. ”
Salazar leaned forward, forearms crossed. He bared his palms. “I can’t tell you no, Eshe. If this is what you really want… I will do as you ask.”
I flung my arms around him, and I could tell even he was surprised by my physical affection.
But I didn’t tell him goodbye last time, and it didn’t feel right to pass up on it again when he was here right now for me, calling me by my old name.